helplessly hoping

Description

Because sometimes everything is hard and nothing is easy and Hanbin isn't really sure what he's doing anymore. 

Foreword

Hi! This is my first time writing a story like this, but I just got inspired by all the beautiful work I see on here and finally got the guts to post something... This will be multiple chapters I already have a lot of it written so updates should be pretty frequent. Please feel free to point out any errors or mistakes! I hope everybody enjoys reading this and that it doesn't get to monotonously depressing... Thanks!

Also for some context this is taking place during the duration of Hanbin's stint on show me the money 3 and references a lot of events that occured on the show. 

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Comments

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dukkuu #1
hey, don't know if you'll ever see this but i made a poster for your story years ago, but the image site i used crashed so it disappeared. If you still want it, I've left a new link in the replies.
naxxerie #2
Chapter 10: I think Hanbin doing his suicide pill in the practice room where anyone could see him shows that he isn't really fully convinced that he should die. Those who are 100% certain that they should tend to commit it in a way that there's little to no chance of surviving, say taking the sleeping pills and then jumping in the Han river. Your body would struggle but then it'll go limp because of the pills. Then you'll drown.
hazecraze 930 streak #3
Chapter 24: Almost been a year since I found this but this is one of the fics that I keep rereading. The descriptions, the balance of perspectives, the emotional development...it's all beautiful. Definitely one of my favorites here on AFF.
Helloimevelyn #4
Chapter 24: Can't believe I took so long to find you story. This really has been one emotional roller coaster. I'm really thankful you took so much time writing this beautiful story especially cos it's so relatable. Too relatable since I understand every single thing hanbin was feeling and expressing from the start. Hopefully more ikonics get to read this story too :"D This really is a masterpiece. Thank you.
hazecraze 930 streak #5
This had the perfect amount of angst. Loved it <3 I've reread this so many times that I can't count lol XD
jodieklien #6
Chapter 24: I read the whole story and was moved a lot. The way Hanbin suffered, how his life after the event was described as "grey", the pain of realizing our insignificance to the world, all of them can relate to myself. Thank you so much for writing such a good story like this. And I really want to translate it into Vietnamese for other iKONICs in Vietnam to know about it. Can I have your permission? I surely will take it with full link and credit to you.
Silhoutte #7
I really love it and i love you :') thank you for this beautiful fanfic its perfect. Please dont stop writing more fanfic because i will surely read it. ily :') <3
theloveyouknew #8
Chapter 24: This is so beautiful I can't believe its over ... :( I cried at some chapters and oh gosh is this story just perfect or perfect.
shinwoops #9
Chapter 1: I've read this three or four times now from start to finish and honestly I've never read something so emotionally compelling before. It really makes me feel connected to everyone in the story and I feel like it's a good introspective view of the mind of someone suffering from depression and how they might not even really understand it themselves.
Thank you for writing this, I hope you continue on making good stories!
superspecialawesomes #10
Chapter 23: I have no words for how amazing this is omg well done and thank you for writing this! Especially seeing as there are hardly any good iKON fics out there yet let alone such a great one like this!
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