It was like any other night, Bom supposed, where she was ambushed by her roommates for a late interview. But she didn't expect it to turn out like this. After she admitted wanting to date Minwoo she felt a horrible twist in her stomach makes its way up to her chest. It gripped on her lungs and sobs long enough for her to make it to the bathroom.  As Sora joined her, she wept silently in her arms as she was embraced. If only they knew.

*Flashback*

"Wait, a bonus trip for people who fall in love?" TOP asked skeptically as his eyes peered at Bom from above the sheet.

"Something like that. I don't know. Anyway, it's not like it'll happen to me!" she exclaimed as she played with the hem of her oversized sweater. "So ...is this okay?" she asked. TOP looked back at her. She didn't feel comfortable doing something like this without talking to him first.

"Noona, you'll be living with strangers and guys. It's... it's indecent!" Bom pouted and wondered if the preservation of her image was truly his concern.

"Please, Tabi? It sounds like a lot fun and I can make new friends! I promise I won't look at anyone..." she trailed off. He closed his eyes and rubbed both temples with one hand. Most days he was patient. Today was not one of them. 

"You're asking me to give you my blessing, so that you can meet other guys under the same roof, while also making yourself completely vulnerable on national television, noona. Can you understand why I'm having trouble with this?" Bom recoiled at his primitive summary of the show. Of course, TOP was the most private man on the planet. She felt the shift in the atmosphere and knew where this was headed. Normally, she'd relent but not this time.

"I guess so if you put it that way... but it's not as bad as it sounds!" she protested. "Please?" TOP let out a sigh.

"Bom, I can't give this to you." She looked away as she felt her insides boil and her cheeks flush.

"That wouldn't be the first time you've told me that." she spat out. As soon as the words left , her eyes flashed to his and he instantly knew she regretted them. He shook his head as his gaze left hers.

"I need a smoke." he muttered. Bom leapt from her seat and stood face to face with him.

"You told me you quit!" she hissed. She could feel moisture stinging her eyes but she bit back the tears. TOP didn't or couldn't face her.

"You know, Chae was right. You're not even my boyfriend, so why should I listen to you? Why does this even matter?" She gestured to them both. "Why does any of this matter?" Bom’s eyes pleaded with his. They searched for a response but he looked away and closed his eyes.

"Don't you want to be happy? I know I do." she almost whispered. TOP clenched his jaw.

"You know it's not that simple, Bom." he said quietly and almost coldly. She opened to say something but shut it immediately. Bom turned her head away from him, hoping her tears wouldn't fall. After a minute of silence, she quickly grabbed her bag and left the room but not before giving him one last look.

As the door slammed shut, TOP crumpled up the paper in his hands and whipped it across the room. His collar felt hot and his hands felt tense. He raked them through his hair as he stared down at the floor between his legs. He was the one who was supposed to make her happy.

He desperately wanted, no, needed to give her his love but he couldn't. His hands were tied. His love for her was bound up seven years ago and the knots remained till this day. He cleared his throat as he got up and took out a cigarette. He held it in his mouth as he walked across the room to the glass cabinet where he pulled out a bottle of whiskey and shut the balcony door behind him.