Three and a half hours. That’s how long she’s been staring at their picture. She flipped the photo and smiled wistfully upon reading the caption he wrote. Who knew they’d end up this way? She closed her eyes and tried to bring herself back to that day. A smile crept unto her face but the moment she opened her eyes once more, her gaze landed on that lavender envelope. Her expression turned solemn. She slowly reached out to that beautifully embossed card, but just when it was an inch away from her grasp, she heard a soft knock on her door.

She was startled for a second before she realized she had to fix herself in order to look more presentable. With one quick glimpse at the mirror and deciding she looked decent enough, she cleared as she said,

“Come in.”

She watched as she saw the knob turn slightly and she felt that twinge in her heart the moment she laid eyes on the person who stepped inside the room. Him. Of all the people, he was the least she expected at the moment. Not a word was exchanged during the first two minutes of their meeting. The tension hung so thick in the air that she felt it was sharp enough to slice through her perfectly built façade. She thought that this feeling was exclusive only to him, but time and he proved otherwise. Or maybe she’s still just as confused as any girl out there.

“So…” they said at the same time, making them look up and smile.

She felt that teeny bit of a somersault within her upon the reappearance of that boyish dimpled smile. After all, it was once a smile that made her heart skip a beat. Once. Fortunately.

He nervously shuffled his foot, scratched his head, his gaze unsettled as he slid down a medium sized pink box across her desk.

“I just thought…I mean, it’s only right that you have these..it’s yours anyway..I uh..” he stuttered.

She knew the contents of that box and it only made it hard for her to open the lid. To save herself from bawling her eyes out, she too, carefully pushed it back to his direction.

“I don’t want it back.” he said.

“Neither do I.” she replied.

He sighed as he looked at her sadly. She nodded and he took that as a cue to open the box. Inside it was a mini-keyboard/piano and two matching silver bracelets. The two of them had to look away in order to blink back the tears.

That mini-piano. The one you could buy in Toy Kingdom for a preschool kid to play with. That was the first thing they bought together for a project way back in junior high. They got paired up in music class and the rest, as they say, is history.

The silver bracelets were a gift from him to her during their senior prom. It’s something like a promise ring but since she was so adamant on not wanting anything that suggests some commitment, he bought a bracelet in place of a ring.

They were the best of friends. They’ve been with each other through ups and downs, thick and thin, best and worst. Though they were never really together, they did date other people or had a couple of flings or so. But never with each other. It was the perfect cliché for a standard romcom. Best friends falling for one another but refusing to make a move for fear of ruining the friendship. Classic.

Deep down, everyone (including them), always thought that it was just a matter of time and circumstance before they finally get together. It was the picture perfect love story a girl could dream of, but sadly, it took a dramatic twist and ended up as a tragedy. Minus the part wherein someone literally dies. It all came crashing down just because of one mistake. One.

The silence made a comeback and this time, they both knew they were recalling that last conversation they had after the fiasco.

“I just want to ask you one thing: WHY? Include every other sentence you could add up that word.” she cried.

“I’m sorry.” That was all he said.

“Would your “sorry” undo all the pain you’ve caused me?  I don’t think so. So let’s just save ourselves from that drama and go straight to the point. Was it you who gave it to her?” she asked through gritted teeth.

“Yes.”  he bowed his head in shame. How does one explain that he got blinded by greed and lust? Is there really any excuse to betray the one person you never should’ve?

“How could you? How long have you been conspiring with her? Since when? Was it all just a joke? And to top it off, you tell me that you knocked her up? Wow. Bravo! Jeongmal. You’re jjang. Jinjja daebak!.” She laughed bitterly.

“Seohyun-ah..” he pleaded. He doesn’t know what else to do.

“Don’t. Just don’t. I can’t. I’m sorry. But this is it. This is the end. It’s a good thing you were never more than just a friend, otherwise, I don’t know if I could survive this catastrophe you put me into.”  She hated goodbyes and so, just walked out the door and left.

She pushed all those memories aside as she took out the items on that box and pretended to inspect it.

“You know, an object only means something when we give it that much importance in our lives. See this?” she said as she lifted up her favorite fountain pen. He nodded.

“To most people, it’s nothing more than just a fancy fountain pen. Just some instrument you use to write down something. But to me, it’s more than just that. This was given to me by my harabeoji on graduation day. That was the last time I spoke to him before he had a cardiac arrest a week later. Every time I use this, it feels like my harabeoji is holding my hand, telling me that I’m a person he’s proud of with every word that is put into paper because of this.

And this cup…” she said as she put the pen down and lifted an orange coffee cup.

He nodded, still unsure of where the conversation was headed.

“This was given to me by my very first assistant. The person who I worked with when I was just a struggling fresh grad getting a grip on her first real job. The one who encouraged me that I could make my way up if I had enough determination and confidence. And that calendar over there…yes, that bright and colorful Simpson calendar. It was given by some “annoying prick” on New Year’s Eve just to remind me that my days as a senior VP are numbered since he’s up to take my spot. Whenever I look at it, I feel challenged to do better. Especially now that the both of us are vying for the same promotion.”

His expression didn’t betray his confusion and so, she spoke once more.

“What I’m trying to say is, it all boils down to something we like to call as  “sentimental value.” These things only mean something because of the memories attached to it. The memories we ourselves hold on so dearly because with change being a constant thing, it serves as a reminder of who we once were and so on and so forth. Other than the so-called “sentimental value,” everything else is nothing more than an inanimate object or accessory.”

He bit back his tongue as he desperately fought the tears. He turned around for a second to wipe any traces of it, but as soon as he faced her, he knew that he failed.

“I really am sorry, Seohyun-ah. For everything.” he cried as he got on his knees.

She stood up and helped him to get back on his own feet. She held his face in her hands and while the two of them looked at each other in the eye, she smiled sadly and said,

“I forgive you. For everything.”

He could no longer hold it back as he cried and wrapped his arms around her. She tried to console him, but she too, needed to be comforted. She broke the hug immediately as she wiped her own tears. He put the bracelet back into the box and was about to do the same with the small piano but just to try his luck, he braved himself for a final request.

“Can you at least, sing a song for me? Just one last request.  Before I give these things away…” he asked.

She nodded as she wordlessly took the piano from him and began to play the first notes of the song that used to be her favorite back in high school. Almost. Talk about irony taking a jab at you in real life.

Can you tell me

How can one miss what she's never had

How could I reminisce when there is no past

How could I have memories of being happy with you boy

Could someone tell me how can this be

How could my mind pull up incidents

Recall dates and times that never happened

How could we celebrate a love that's too late

And how could I really mean the words I'm ‘bout to say…

She had to pause before she willed herself to continue. After all, this was the last time she’d do this for him.

I missed the times that we almost shared

I miss the love that was almost there

I miss the times that we use to kiss

At least in my dreams

Just let me take my time and reminisce

I miss the times that we never had

What happened to us we were almost there

Whoever said its impossible to miss when you never had

Never, never almost had you

There was no denying the fact that he was her almost, and she too, was his. Sad how something beautiful ended up this way. Before their emotions could get the best (or worst) of them, he forced a smile as he said,

“I hope you could come. It’ll really mean a lot to me if you’re there.”

She laughed softly as she shook her head.

“Yeah. I wish I could say I’d love to go, but honestly, you’re marrying the girl who didn’t exactly hesitate to play the villain in my life, so, I can’t. I can’t go. It’s too soon. But I’ll try. I’ll try to forgive her. I mean, I already have, but it’ll take some time before I could forget about everything that has happened.”

“Can we, at least, be friends?” he asked nervously.

“Sure.” She replied immediately. His face beamed but fell again once she said,

“But not right now…”

He looked so dejected and she didn’t want everything to end on a bad note so she said,

“Maybe tomorrow. Give me 24 hours to sort things out. Or at least, my feelings.”

The two of them laughed. She walked closer to him, held his chin and smiled for the last time.

“I sincerely hope you’ll be happy. You deserve to be.”

Another tear escaped his eye as he smiled for the last time and replied,

“I wish I could’ve been your happiness, but I know you deserve someone who’d never break you like I did.”

The theatrics could go on, but before anything else was said once more, someone entered the picture, and said,

“Dude, even if you break her into a million little pieces, I’d pick all that up and make her whole again. Even with all the cracks, imperfections, and flaws, I’ll accept her for who she is. And you’re right. Unlike you, I’ll never ever break her. If there’s going to be any breaking, that would be my fists smashing your ing face.” He bragged and cussed.

She glared at him as he put an arm around her possessively. She tried to push him away because his close proximity was driving her insane. Any minute and she might really go crazy. Just a moment ago she was being all dramatic with letting go of her best friend (her “almost”) and now the namja who wouldn’t get out of her mind and heart for the past eleven months was making her feel all sorts of things.

She was going to say something to alleviate the tension, but he just had to pick this moment to hold her tighter while sneakily stealing a quick kiss on her cheek. She used to say that she hated it whenever he does that, but secretly, the two of them knew that was a lie.

“Now that you’ve said your piece, oh and by the way inviting her to your wedding was a really dumb thing to do, I think you have no business in here anymore. See that rectangular thing?” he said as he pointed towards the door.

“Now that, is what you call, a door. Once again, A DOOR. D-O-O-R. DOOR. A door is a movable barrier used to open and close the entrance to a building, room, closet, or vehicle. I think you’re old enough to find the exit. Just in case you need help figuring it out, tell me so I can ring the security.”

A battle of testosterone was about to occur, so before her office could turn into a slaughterhouse, she intervened and asked her guest to leave. Once it was all clear, she turned back to the guy who ruined the scene, a.k.a. the one who gave her that Simpson calendar.

“R-U-D-E. Rude. Here.” she said as she harshly threw a dictionary at him. She regretted it immediately because the dictionary she threw was a gift from their boss’s wife. She might as well hide it in her house lest her superiors would think she’s an ungrateful employee.

Before worry could completely settle in her mind, she looked at him and tried to shift her mixed emotions by focusing on anger.

“You might want to expand your vocabulary because you definitely fit into that word. Oh, and add in the “jerk” too. Perfect definition of you.” she rolled her eyes and left angrily.

He cursed as he slapped his hand across his forehead recognizing the mistake he made.

“Hyung, I warned you. That was such a pabo thing to do.  You knew they needed that closure but you just had to barge in there and do that…” his assistant got into position as he mimicked the way he spoke.

“Dude, even if you break her into a million little pieces, I’d pick all that up and make her whole again. Even with all the cracks, imperfections, and flaws, I’ll accept her for who she is. And you’re right. Unlike you, I’ll never ever break her. If there’s going to be any breaking, that would be my fists smashing your ing face.

Hyung, jinjja! I never knew you were that cheesy. Love really makes one do things beyond our comprehension. You’re a proof of that.” His assistant laughed heartily.

“ off. I was stupid and careless, I get it..but she was crying and I hate seeing her that way.” he defended. He wanted to think of something else to say but his mind is in a jumble that he couldn’t even bring himself to construct a much more believable sentence.

“You should’ve just told her everything when you had the chance. The chance that you keep wasting since your university days. That you changed your career for her. That she’s the reason you turned down that once in a lifetime offer to work in France. That she’s the girl who won your heart and made every other woman pale in comparison. That she’s the one who made you stop partying so you could drop her at home safely even if you had to carry her to your car forcibly. That she’s the reason why you lost interest in the dating scene and began that eerie talk about settling down, having your own family and whatever. Your facial expression whenever marriage is brought up is seriously creepy, hyung. No offense!

That it took you years before you got the balls to talk to her and when you finally did, you couldn’t even say anything comprehensible to mankind. I’ve never seen you that tongue tied hyung. It’s one of my greatest regrets that I wasn’t able to capture that moment on video.

That you argue and debate her proposals during every conference just because you wanted her to remember your name. That you study and get involved with all the paperwork just to impress her. Jinjja hyung, your suave playboy businessman image is of no use when it comes to a girl named Seo Joohyun. The one who made the mighty dragon fall to his knees and be dragged around like a lovesick puppy.”

“Don’t you have to edit those reports I gave you and manage the schedules? Be useful and go your own way.” he tried to divert the topic because he knew there’s no use trying to deny any of it.

His assistant tried to hold in his laughter as he gave a salute and walked towards his office. Before he was out of sight, he called out to his boss and said,

“And hyung! Don’t you have a girl you should be running after? Be useful and go your own way. Just a tip: Senior VP Seo loves to roam around the rooftop garden or the playground. I saw you writing it in your journal for her! Goodluck!”

He knew the rest of their co-workers heard what his assistant said. It didn’t help either that they were all aware of his feelings towards Senior VP Seo. He gritted his teeth as he walked out the door (not oblivious to the giggles and murmurs) and muttered his complaints under his breath.

“Lee Jonghyun you pabo. I’ll make you pay for this. Aish! Now where did Hyun go? Jeongmal. Aish jinjja!”

He kept walking around until he spotted her on the couple swing in the nearby playground. He didn’t say a word as he sat beside her and patted his shoulder.

“Yah.” He said as he once again, patted his shoulder. She arched an eyebrow and God knows how hard it took him to control himself from falling head over heels in love with this stubborn yeoja all over again.

”C’mon. I know you need this. A shoulder to cry on. This is a limited offer, but for you, I might just want to extend it.” he said smugly.

“And who said anything about me needing to cry? Go away.”  she replied, though deep down, she’s just one smirk (that smirk that he does which drives her insane…insanely in love if that’s what it is)from giving in to him.

He sighed as he gently took her head and let her lean on him while wrapping his other arm on her waist.

“It’s okay. It’s okay to cry, Hyun. I don’t mind.”

With that, she broke down in tears until his shirt was drenched.

“I’m not crying for him just so you know. I’m crying for me. For being such a fool and trusting him. For believing that he’ll never turn his back on me. For losing someone I dearly loved…AS A FRIEND.”

He didn’t miss the emphasis she put on the word “friend.” Somehow, he felt relieved.

He pulled her towards him and held her closer. He kissed the top of her head as he half-heartedly joked,

“That’s why I told you countless times, it should’ve been me.”

She laughed as she looked up at him and replied,

“Don’t worry, Yong. I promise. It is you. Maybe not always but from now and until then.”

He wanted to believe in her so badly that his forlorn expression didn’t escape her eye as he asked,

“To be honest, Joohyuy, I’m every cliché you’ve been looking for…the bad boy and the good girl. The chaebol and the ordinary girl. The rival. I think I only missed out on the best friend tag. If we set aside our differences, you’d see that we fit each other’s ideal type…” he enumerated. He could feel his heart hammering inside his chest as he looked at her and softly asked,

“….so… I’m just wondering…uh..w-why haven’t you still fallen in love with me?”

He was nervous as hell. On the other hand, she felt like she was on cloud nine. This man must really love her that much for him to shed off his pride and image before her to ask that question. For him to be brave enough to show her his vulnerable side.

“Who said I haven’t?”  she .

“You called me an annoying prick.” He accused her, but regretted it because that meant that he was eavesdropping on her conversation a while ago.

“A handsome, arrogant one at that.” she laughed.

He pouted and she found that sight so adorable. She was going to mock him or throw in the usual dose of insult, but before she could speak, he took her hand, placed it in his heart, as he held her face while looking into her eyes and said,

“Don’t worry, Hyun. He was just your “almost.” The almost boyfriend. The almost lover. But there’s no need for you to cry over him or dwell on the past. You know why? Because I’m here. He’s just your "almost," while I, I’m your FOREVER.” He smiled.

There was no other explanation for what she felt because deep down, from her bones to the depths of her soul, she knew that he was right. Jung Yonghwa IS her forever, and starting now, she’d make certain that every other girl knew that. There’s no more time or chances to be put to waste.

She smiled as he leaned closer to her. Before that long awaited kiss, he said,

“You know, this is the part where we’re supposed to say we love each other.”

“So? Say it first.” She whined.

“YAH! Why me? Ladies first.” He complained.

“Andwae! You coward namja!” she yelled.

Before she could protest, he held her nape and shut her up with a kiss. A kiss that knocked all her senses out and her heart beating like crazy.

“Sorry, couldn’t help myself. You look so hot when you’re all argumentative and we’ve got all the cliché covered. I know you wouldn’t mind me changing up the events. But yeah. I still want to say it and since you insist…” he babbled.

“Just say it Yong.” she .

“I LOVE YOU!!! There! I said it!” he blushed profusely and he felt so shy that he had to stand up and face the wall.

She laughed as she watched the choding she’s in love with stay true to his hidden alter ego (the choding, not the typical suave Jung Yonghwa everyone is aware of).

She turned him to face her as she pecked his lips and said,

“And I love you too. There. Quits?”

“Hell yeah.” He said as he tugged her closer and again, shared another kiss. The hoots and catcalls were loud enough to remind them that they are still in a public area. They broke apart only to see their colleagues holding pompoms and banners.

They all laughed as the mild drizzle poured in. Sometimes, we meet and become attached to a person until we thought that he/she could be it. Life happened and we realized that they’re not the ones we hoped them to be. Before regret could take hold of the emotions, remember that with every “almost” that came in and went out from your life, your “forever” could be just around the corner.

~The End.~

Author’s Note:

It might’ve been confusing at some parts but I purposely left out naming the other guy, aka Seohyun’s “almost” in this story just so you could picture whoever you want him to be. I don’t want to use another actor or idol’s name for imaginary purposes for some reasons. :D I thought of elaborating more on their story but this is a Yongseo one so no thanks. Also, I’m not up for the added effort of writing that.

I don’t know how this turned out to be with so many details left out, but feedbacks are always appreciated. Thanks for dropping by. Have a great weekend. 

^^