At two in the morning, Luhan’s phone vibrated and lit up, illuminating a corner of his room. It was a text message from one his close friends Sehun.

                Luhan?

Luhan paused for a while. All his movements were slow, as if he were a zombie. In reality, he was reluctant to reply since he had just experienced a week of demanding school projects and backbreaking exams, and all he really wanted to do for the rest of the week was to press his face against his warm pillow while being wrapped in his favorite soft cotton sheets for as long as possible. But no, it was 2AM, which could only lead to two possibilities: Sehun’s in trouble or he’s drunk. And if he truly was drunk, Luhan promised himself that he would kick Sehun’s for waking him up the second he saw him. After a minute of staring into the darkness that filled his room, Luhan rolled to the left side of his bed and reached for his phone sitting on a small brown table.

Still half asleep, he slowly typed back a reply:

                Yeah?

Sehun quickly shot him a reply:

                Good, you’re awake. Can I come spend the night? Please.

Luhan’s mind was then flooded with heaps of questions, but since he was sure he couldn’t muster up enough energy for a phone call or a long text, he typed in a simple answer:

                OK.

               Don’t forget to do the knock on my window, Luhan added, immediately following up his message.

For a few minutes, Luhan sat in silence. He tried to keep himself busy and awake by tapping on the end table softly as he tried to mimic a tune that was stuck in his head. He wasn’t getting impatient though, because Sehun lived about five minutes away, so he could get why Sehun would want to come over to his place compared to all his other friends’ houses. This occasion of Sehun asking to come in the middle of the night was nowhere near new, and it was mostly due to a bad break up. But for Luhan, he has long been able to live with Sehun’s rather impulsive attitude. So, expecting that there would be many more late night impromptu sleep overs, Luhan and Sehun formulated a special knock in order for Luhan to know that it was Sehun waiting outside his glass window covered in curtains, and not some creepy murderer with a bloody axe.

As Luhan’s eyelids were beginning to uncontrollably drop, he heard two taps, followed by a pause, followed by a rhythmical beat that Luhan had come up with repeated two times. Luhan groaned, knowing that he had to get up and lift his considerably large window, which was a few feet off the ground, open.

Luhan walked like a traumatized turtle, and upon unlocking his window and letting the moonlight quietly set in his room, he said with words half slurred: “I should just give you a spare key or something…”

This would’ve been the perfect time for a snobby, sarcastic reply from his friend, but there was only silence, followed by irregular breathing and silent whimpering.

Luhan’s eyes widened at the sight of Sehun’s ruffled curly hair, teardrops that fell like a storm, and cheeks that looked as if they were on fire. Sehun didn’t say a word, proceeded to awkwardly climb in the window with his short legs, failed, and crashed on Luhan’s carpet floor.

“, Luhan,” Sehun said in between his short breaths, still lying on the floor.

“Hey, what happened?” Luhan pulled his friend up and let him sit on his bed.

“So, my parents got into a huge fight, again. Because of my sister’s sickness. They were blaming each other and I just exploded and they started yelling at me so I locked myself in my room and I texted you and now I’m here,” Sehun said as his weight crashed on Luhan’s bed. “You saved my life again,” he said while staring blankly at the ceiling filled with old glow-in-the-dark stars and planets, managing to only radiate faintly.

Luhan had never seen his friend so fazed; and he didn’t know anyone else who loved his little sister as much as Sehun did.

Unsure of what to do, Luhan lied down next to Sehun, fixing his eyes on him longingly. He could see that Sehun’s eyes fighting for a reason he wasn’t sure of, and that the unnatural amount of sweat made his curls uncomfortably stick to his face. And even though Sehun wasn’t crying anymore, Luhan could see the dried tracks on his cheeks.

“Sehun,” Luhan said softly, his voice almost breaking. “It’s going to be okay,” Luhan reassured Sehun, who was still looking up at the ceiling, barely even blinking.

“I know, Luhan. I know it’s going to be okay. I know that, when time passes, life will be all right. But that’s the thing. Sometimes you find yourself wishing for things to be okay right now, at this very moment. But life doesn’t work that way, and I know this all too well. And it hurts so much, Luhan. Tomorrow might not hurt anymore but tomorrow isn’t here yet. I only have right now, and right now I only have pain and regrets and a dry throat.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Luhan said, his head still turned towards Sehun.

Sehun smirked bitterly and switched his gaze to meet Luhan’s eyes. “You don’t have to.”

Luhan looked at his best friend in a way that he hasn’t looked at him before. Unbeknownst to him, his eyes started to trail down on Sehun. He looked at Sehun’s eyes and saw that they were get moist again. He looked at Sehun’s mouth which was slightly open; his fingers that were bumping against his own. He looked at the way Sehun looked at him. He thought about what must be going through Sehun’s mind right now. He switches over to look at Sehun’s hand again, and he thought about how he’d like his fingers to intertwine with Sehun’s; and then he thought about how weird that would be. However, at the same time, he found himself wanting Sehun’s touch so bad. He was going insane, constantly contradicting himself; but in the end, all he could do was stare at his friend and have their meaningful, wordless conversations.

“Luhan?” Sehun says, voice quivering.

“Hmm?”

“Thanks,” Sehun smiled, his eyes slowly closing. It was 3AM, and they both needed to sleep.

As tired as he was, Luhan observed Sehun fall into a deep slumber next to him. He couldn’t understand what he was feeling now. He’d never wanted to look at his friend this way, but he couldn’t stop. His heart was racing. Slowly, Luhan reached for the other’s hand, and finally knots his fingers with Sehun’s. Sehun didn’t seem to wake up, so Luhan decided to push his luck. He softly pulls both their arms up; their fists now level with their chins. Luhan exhales, and soaks up each second. He liked what was happening right now, as much as he didn’t want to admit it. He liked how he can feel Sehun’s warmth because it made him feel safe.

After almost half an hour, Sehun rustled to turn the other side, but couldn’t since they were still holding hands. Luhan, being the light sleeper he is, immediately woke up to the half-asleep, Sehun. Luhan quickly started to pull a way, trying to give his friend convenience; but Sehun clasped his hand tight.

“Would it be weird to say that I like holding your hand?” Sehun said bashfully.

“Nope,” Luhan smiled.

They found it hard to sleep for a while after that. They were too busy looking at each other, trying to sort their feelings out, which felt very unfamiliar for the both of them.

“I guess being ‘okay’ is on its way now,” Sehun remarks, resting his head on Luhan’s arm.