Seunghoon’s POV

We’re really close to our debut now. Everything is ready—we’ve shot the videos, taken the photos, choreographed the dances (well, that one was all me, heh heh)… everything. We’re all really excited and extremely happy that it’s finally happening. We’re just happy in general these days.

Scratch that—they’re happy in general these days. I’m not.

I mean, I should be… I just explained the biggest reason why. On top of that, I’m healthy, in shape, and my boyfriend is freakin’ hot, for crying out loud. So I should be happy, right?

Well I’m not.

I don’t know what happened. Jinwoo and I were doing so well… We’re the couple with the least amount of drama, what with Taehyun and Seungyoon’s frequent bickering (though they make up soon after) and Minho missing Bobby because he’s always busy, Jinwoo and I look like the perfect couple on the outside. But, being inside the relationship, I’m not so sure.

The spark we had is gone.

He doesn’t blush like he used to whenever I so much as looked at him.

I almost always initiate affection now, and even then sometimes I’m rejected.

I don’t know what to do. Does he not love me anymore…? I’ve been trying to avoid that idea, telling myself that I’m being ridiculous, but it doesn’t work. I’m beyond worried; I’m downright scared. We’ve been through a lot just to get together… I don’t want to throw all of that away! Not when I was just starting to get past my insecurities. Not when my walls were starting to disappear altogether…

I’ve been meaning to say something to him about it, but I don’t know how to approach him about it. He’s worried a lot about our debut, and he doesn’t handle stress well, so I don’t want to add onto it. I just keep it in, like I always do. To be honest, I’m upset Jinwoo hasn’t noticed that things have changed between us. He seems to be going about himself just fine, not realizing that I don’t smile as much as I used to around him, that the cloud of depression that’s never quite left me is coming back ever so slowly.

It’s two o’ clock in the morning. Seungyoon’s fingers are massaging my scalp as I lie pitifully on his stomach. We’re on the bed in his room, Taehyun having fallen asleep in the living room with Minho and Jinwoo in the middle of some movie they were watching. I stare blankly at the fibers of his shirt, just wanting to be silent.

Seungyoon, however, has other plans. “Hyung,” he says quietly.

I don’t move; just continue trying to count the threads of his shirt. “Hm?” I hum tiredly.

“Go to your own bed. I’m gonna go get Taehyun.”

I puff out my cheeks, annoyed because I don’t want to move. “Can’t you just let me lie here a little longer?” I whine.

“You said that two hours ago,” he says matter-of-factly, the smile evident in his voice. Know-it-all little .

I rest my chin on his stomach and glare up at him. “Meanie! Is this how you treat your favorite hyung??”

“No, that’s just how I treat you.” He laughs at me until I pinch him on his side. “Owww!” he howls in pain.

“That’s what you get, Yoon-Yoon.” I plop my head back down, no intentions of moving anytime soon.

He makes an annoyed sound under his breath. “I told you I hate that stupid nickname…” Resigning himself to my demands, he goes back to my hair silently. I plan on falling asleep until he breaks the silence again. I groan.

“Hyung, you really can’t go on like this with Jinwoo-hyung, or else it won’t end up pretty.”

I frown, not wanting to have this conversation with my sometimes-smart leader. “It’ll be fine,” I mutter.

“It will not,” he insists. “Take it from me, the king of stupidity and messing up relationships.” I snort, remembering how drama-filled the months leading up to him and Taehyun getting together were. I wince, not wanting any of that for myself.

I sigh, taking a Snickers bar out and unwrapping it. I hear Seungyoon whisper “The hell did that come from…?” as I start eating it, but I ignore him.

“Yah, you better not get chocolate bits on my shirt.”

Munch munch.

“Yah! You piggy, you did it anyway!”

I chortle, getting even more chocolate on him and he starts whining for me to wipe it off. Deciding to play nice, I do as he wishes and clean it off once I finish. “You’re so funny,” I chuckle as I lay back down. “‘Piggy.’ That’s not nice, Seungyoon-ah.”

“Whatever. Don’t think we’re not talking about this situation you’re in because we are.” He sighs before he continues. “You helped me out a lot before, hyung. I just want to return the favor.”

I nod, understanding his feelings. “What can I even do, though? I’m not good at this sort of thing…”

“I don’t know. You have no ideas?”

I give him a look. Some help he is. “Brat.” He just smiles at me cutely while I bite my lip. “Well…” He raises an eyebrow. “He and I are coming up on our 5 month anniversary… and I wanted to do something special since we weren’t able to do anything the last two months because we’ve been so busy.”

“That’s good!” he chirps encouragingly. “Why don’t you roll with that?”

“I don’t know… I don’t think I can pretend everything is okay for a day in order for us to enjoy it. It’d be hard.” Seungyoon hums, thinking. “And I’m not really the romantic type, so I have no idea what to even do. We never did anything aside from saying ‘Happy month-aversary!’ and cuddling in bed for most of the day, so…”

After a few minutes of silence he talks. “If I agree to help you,” he says slowly, “will you actually do it?”

I chew on the inside of my cheek, thinking. Will this even work? Is it worth it when I feel like I don’t have his love anymore? I don’t know.

Sensing my hesitation, Seungyoon speaks again. “Don’t you want to fix this…?” he asks gently.

I feel my eyes tear up because I really, really do. God, I miss Jinwoo… how he and I were. “Yes,” I choke out, my throat closing up.

“Okay then. So you’ll do it, right?” He pats my head as I nod. “Good. Now get out.” My head snaps up to face him, my eyes wide with slight disbelief. “Please,” he tacks on sweetly.

“You ,” I whine, my bottom lip trembling. I may or may not be exaggerating to make him feel bad but oh well, I’m evil.

Luckily, our anniversary falls on a day we don’t have anything to do, so I’m going to surprise him. I planned our whole day—with Seungyoon’s help, of course—first, I’m going to take him for a late brunch at his favorite place. It’ll be on me; he usually pays since he’s older, but I’m all about pampering him today. Then we’ll walk over to a nearby park and stroll around for a while since he likes to do that. After that, we’ll eat food from random stands and I’ll find one of those cheap claw machines and win him a toy; I did it once before and he loved it, so I’m gonna try to do it again… I’m a natural, though, so I’m not worried about it. Then I’ll buy him aaaaaaanything he wants and we’ll go home and snuggle in our room… maybe I’ll get some, too, seeing as how I haven’t in a long time.

I’ve been looking forward to it, getting a whole day to spend with my cute boyfriend. Even though he sleeps right beside me every night, I feel like… I don’t know, I just miss him. How we used to be. Hopefully we can get back to that today… I know he loves this romantic (it makes me feel awkward, but I’d do anything for him).

When I wake up, everyone’s gone. I frown at the cold space beside me, sitting up in bed and yawning. Since he’s out, I grab my phone off the charger and shoot him a text.

To: JinWoo, You Fine

Bb! I c ur out & about w/out me… ;___; Happy 5 months! Meet me @ our usual place @ 1 prepared for a fun-filled day of luv n romance~!

( ^ 3 ^ )/

I hit send, smiling as I think of his face when he gets it, hoping he’ll smile just like I am. I stretch and look at the clock, noting that I have about two hours to get ready and head to our meeting place. From there, we’ll walk to the restaurant.

“Go go go~!” I say to myself excitedly, pumping my fists in the air. I can’t hide my excitement. I want things to go back to normal today. I’ll finally talk to him about how I’ve been feeling, he’ll reassure me that I’m being silly and say he didn’t mean to make me feel bad, and we’ll go back to normal, my insecurities going away for good.

I take a quick shower and spend a good forty minutes picking out my outfit with care. I want to look so hot that he can’t wait to jump me when we get home. Once I think I look good, I spray myself with the cologne Jinwoo likes on me and head into the living room to watch TV for a few minutes before heading out.

As I’m walking to our spot, I notice a flower stand. I snort and almost pass it by since my boyfriend isn’t a flowers kind of guy, but then I notice the flower crowns for sale and smile. I’ll get it for him to be funny, but also because I secretly think it’ll look really cute on him.

Still smiling, I walk up to the lady, taking out my wallet. “May I have a flower crown please?”

She smiles at me as she asks me which flowers I want. “For a pretty girl?” she asks as she makes it for me.

“Something like that,” I say, thanking her after I pay and walk away.

I play with the crown in my hands, getting way too happy at the thought of him wearing it. Jinwoo is so beautiful. His doe eyes are so round and pretty, his little nose just perfect while his pink lips still give me butterflies when I look at them. He makes me such a sap, but I don’t even care.

It’s 1:30. Jinwoo still hasn’t come. I’m worried about him, messing with my hands nervously. I decide to send him a text.

To: JinWoo, You Fine

Bb? Didja get lost? Kkkk~

2:30. My is numb from this damned bench and the sky has clouded over. Jinwoo needs to hurry up…

3:25. I’m freaking out. Where is he?? Is he hurt???

I have half a mind to get up and look around for him but I don’t budge… I don’t want him to come and have me not be there.

It’s 4:30.

He’s not coming.

I smile sadly, laughing at myself. I’m going to get sick, I’m so soaked. That’s funny, right…?

…Why isn’t he coming…?

Why won’t he come?

It’s our anniversary.

Did he forget?

Doesn’t he love me anymore?

I feel like a fool for doing this. I feel like an idiot for trying. Stupid Seungyoon… I shouldn’t have listened to him.

…No, it’s not his fault. He was only trying to help. I’d still hurt like this even if I’d planned nothing.

My baby forgot about us today. He forgot about me.

I can feel my tears mixing with the rain pouring down my face, ignoring how cold I am and the looks of pity passerby give me.

Seungyoon’s POV

“Yikes, it’s really pouring out there,” Taehyun says softly, staring out of the window of the store. He wanted to come buy some more of that weird, fancy tea mix he’s been into lately, so we came here to get it. We were going to go to some art exhibit he desperately wanted to sneak into (YG for sure wouldn’t want us at such a public event where the press can photograph us), but it’s raining, so we’re just going to watch movies on Netflix instead.

“Mm,” I reply, glad I brought my umbrella.

The bored looking teen behind the register finishes ringing up our purchase and we’re on our way. My arm itches to snake around Taehyun’s waist, but I resist, content with the brushing of our arms as we huddle together under my umbrella. My mind strays to Seunghoon and Jinwoo, worried and hoping everything is going well. I don’t like seeing my hyung so upset.

“Hey, honey?” Taehyun whispers, looking over at me. “You okay?” he asks, his face concerned.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine,” I say, shaking my head.

“They’ll be okay, Seungyoon-ah.” I nod, agreeing with him. They’re probably holed up at home now since the weather’s so—

I pause, causing Taehyun to stop too. “What?” he asks. I don’t answer him, my face gone pale and my blood boiling.

What the hell do Jinwoo and Minho think they’re doing, coming out of the movie theater and goofing around like that?

Taehyun notices my change in demeanor and looks in the direction I am, squinting as he asks, “Is that Jinwoo-hyung and Mino-yah?”

My lips set in a thin, straight line, I glare at Jinwoo with all my might. What the actual . It’s almost storming out. If he’s not with Seunghoon, where the is he? I’m going to wring his neck. What is he doing with Minho on the date of his anniversary??

I stomp over to where the two idiots are currently standing under an awning over a shop, laughing at I-don’t-care-what-because-they’re-both-so-dead, Taehyun hot on my trail. Good, I could really use him and his basket of dirty looks to help make Jinwoo feel like .

Minho sees me first and waves. “Heyyy, Seungyo…” His sentence trails off once he sees how pissed I am. Jinwoo turns to look at me too, confusion marked all over his face.

“Kim Jinwoo, what the hell are you doing?!” I screech, my nostrils flaring.

Jinwoo’s eye twitches at my rude way of addressing him, but he tries to play it off with a smile. “Eh?? What did I do to deserve this tone? Rude—“

“What’s rude is ditching your ing boyfriend on the day of your gotdamn anniversary,” Taehyun hisses.

Minho’s eyes widen comically as Jinwoo pales. “W-What…?”

It takes everything in me not to cause a scene. “Don’t you ever check your phone??? I’m sure he’s tried to contact you a billion times by now!!”

With shaky hands, he reaches into his pocket and retrieves his phone. From the tears that collect in his eyes as he reads every missed text and every missed call he must have gotten, I’m guessing he really hasn’t checked his phone. His hand comes up to rest over his mouth as he tries to keep from sobbing, but I’m not hearing it.

“What on Earth have you been doing all day to have not realized that he’s been trying to reach you for who knows how long?” I say lowly.

Minho’s temper starts to flare up as he comes to stand next to Jinwoo in his defense. “Yah, don’t talk like that to him. He didn’t know and it’s completely ing disrespectful—“

“Be quiet, hyung,” I growl, pinching the bridge of my nose with my free hand. “How would you feel if you’d gone to a whole lot of trouble to plan a whole romantic day for your boyfriend on your anniversary and he forgot about it and instead happily hung out with another guy, who previously expressed romantic interest in him, all damn day and left you waiting alone?!”

That shut him up, and rightfully so. His shoulders deflate and his temper disappears, instead replaced by regret. Everybody is silent now, Taehyun and I seething and Minho and Jinwoo sorry.

Then I remembered the most important person in all of this: Seunghoon. He can’t be okay. I have to go find him and check on him. I shoot him a text but get no reply. I panic.

“Dammit… Come on, we need to find him. We’ll split up.” As I turn around, I stop and look Jinwoo straight in the eyes. “And you better hope I don’t find him first hyung, because if I have to see the look on his face right now, I guarantee you I’m going to be royally pissed at you for a long time, your feelings be damned.”

Seunghoon’s POV

I’m sneezing. My teeth are chattering. I’m probably going to get hypothermia. I don’t care.

Jinwoo forgot. I never thought he would, but he did…

I don’t even know why I’m still sitting here.

I guess a part of me still thinks he’ll remember and come meet me. Aren’t I pathetic…?

I laugh at myself humorlessly, ignoring the buzzing of my phone.

Wait, my phone is buzzing? Jinwoo…? I check it and, to my dismay, it’s just Taehyun calling me. I put my phone back in my wet pocket, staring forlornly at the ruined flower crown and bag of chocolates. I start crying to the point where I can’t see anything anymore… not that I could see much anyways with the rain running into my eyes. This stupid smile won’t leave my face… I’m such an idiot.

I just want to know why. Does Jinwoo really not love me anymore…?

I hear feet sloshing toward me and look up to see a blurry figure in front of me. Or is it two…?

“Hyung…?” I ask, my voice small. I can barely hear myself over the rain. I’m sure I look stupid to him, all wet and smiling like an idiot, but he’s here now.

“Oh, hyung…” I hear Seungyoon moan sadly. Why is he here?

I feel my smile turn into a grimace as I start crying harder. “Where’s Jinwoo-hyung…?” I wail. “Where is he??”

“Shh…” I hear as someone hugs me, and the rain stops falling on me. I think Seungyoon has an umbrella.

Seungyoon and Taehyun brought me back to the dorm and made me take a bath before making me get in pajamas and get in bed. I guess I have a fever or something. I was so stupid to sit out there like that, waiting on someone who wouldn’t come. My worst fear came true. I feel so numb.

Seungyoon had kissed me on the temple before leaving, probably to go hover uselessly over Taehyun while he makes me soup since he can’t cook himself. The thought makes me want to smile, but I can’t. Instead, I close my eyes and try to sleep, because that’s all I feel like doing right now. My eyes are heavy from all the crying I did.

Just as I feel myself start to slip away, I hear feet running to my room and the door opening as someone rushes in and sits on the bed next to me. Whoever it is puts his hand on my cheek before snatching it away; I’m probably burning up. When I hear crying, that’s when I decide I should probably open my eyes, although I struggle with it.

Jinwoo is looking down at me and the look on his face as he sobs into his hands makes my eyes sting too. Where has he been all day…? I want to turn around and ignore him but I also want to sit up and scoop him into my arms. I do neither.

“Where have you been?” I croak.

“I’m so sorry Seunghoon-ah!” he wails. “I’m so sorry, I—“

“I called and texted you… so many times…” The tears start running freely down my face.

“I know, and I’m so so—“

“Yeah, you’re sorry. What were you doing? Who were you with that made you forget about me, ignore my texts, and forget our anniversary…?”

He just looks even guiltier and rushes to hold me as he cries even harder. “Don’t you love me anymore?” I whisper.

He leans back to look at me. “Wh-what? Of course I—“

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed how different you are to me. I can never make you blush like you used to. You don’t initiate anything with me like you used to. You don’t let me hold you anymore at night like you used to. Have you lost interest in me so quickly? …After all I’ve told you and how hard it was for me to accept my feelings for you…?”

Jinwoo just stares at me, speechless as he continues to cry.

Jinwoo takes care of me until I get better, but neither of us says anything. We don’t talk about what happened, and it’s annoying me. Does he not care? That hurts even more. He’s hurt me so bad… this is what I was afraid of before we got together. Now I’m into this relationship so deep that I can’t just forget it all, and it makes me feel cheated because he’s the one who convinced me we’d be okay if we did this.

I feel lied to.

It’s the second day I’ve been feeling completely better and been able to do stuff on my own. I don’t really leave my room much, though. I still opt to lie down and just sleep, I’m so heartbroken. Jinwoo just sits in the desk chair and stares at me all day, remorse and regret in his eyes. I ignore it.

Today is different though. After I’ve set down my breakfast plate and laid back down to go back to sleep, he gets up and takes my dishes to the sink. When he comes back, he shuts the door and crawls in beside me. I flinch when he wraps his arms around me from behind.

“Hoonie…?”

I don’t answer, staring straight at the wall with my jaw set.

“Hoonie, can we talk now?”

“I’ve been ready to talk. Now you are?” I bite out harshly.

He’s quiet for a beat, but then he speaks up again. “I just wanted to wait until you got better,” he answers meekly. I don’t say anything after that, so he continues. “Seunghoon-ah, I’m so sorry.”

“I—“

“Please just let me talk and listen,” he interrupts softly. I do as he says and bite my tongue. “I have no excuse for forgetting our anniversary. With all the things we’ve been doing and how we stopped celebrating it recently, it just slipped my mind. I’m a jerk for that, so I’m sorry and I’ll accept it if you h-hate me now and want to b-break up.” He starts sounding like he’s going to cry so I’m about to in when he continues. “I’m the one who suggested Minho and I hang out that day because I wanted to give you your space.” Give me my space? I think. What the hell? “Of course if I had known you’d planned something I would have happily spent the day with you. I would have rather been with you either way.” He squeezes me tighter. “I’m so sorry for leaving you waiting like that, I didn’t mean to! I was just stupid and didn’t notice anything because I had my phone on silent. Please don’t think I don’t love you because that’s not true!” He finally breaks down and I slowly turn around in his embrace to face him, tears of my own in my eyes.

“But you’ve been so different to me lately…” I whisper.

He sniffles. “I remember… I remember what you said before. I didn’t realize I was making you feel that way and I really wish you would have spoken up sooner so I could tell you you have nothing to worry about.”

“But—“

“But nothing. I love you, you stupid giant. That hasn’t changed. I don’t cuddle with you anymore because really I’ve just been tired. I know it sounds dumb, but I’ve really been having trouble sleeping because I’m worried. I noticed you’ve gotten sadder but I didn’t say anything because I hoped you’d come to me first.” He wipes at his eyes. “Me being less affectionate was me trying to give you space because you looked so sad. I figured you’d want to deal with it on your own or something and I didn’t want to annoy you.”

I look down, my tears drying on my face. Was this all just a misunderstanding…?

“That whole thing about me not responding to you anymore?” he adds. “I’m sorry, and excuse my language, but that’s bull. You still have the same effect over me. Nothing’s changed. You’re still the only one that makes my heart beat faster and lights up my day, and that’s what counts. I always see you…” He my cheek. “This is my fault… I’m not being a good boyfriend if I made you think I don’t love you so easily.” He plants a gentle kiss on my nose. “I’m sorry I’m such a clueless ditz and there’s really no excuse and I’m sorry,” he apologizes again, squeezing himself into the crook of my neck.

I hesitate before I hold him back, crying again out of relief. “I’m sorry too… I guess I let my issues get the better of me again.” I smile bitterly… I’ve never been good at letting the past go, and my last “relationship” hurt me so bad that I’m a ty boyfriend now. “I’ll work harder not to be so insecure, I guess. Don’t ever think you being affectionate with me is annoying.” I sniffle pitifully. “I love all that you do. I’m sorry I at relationships.”

Jinwoo peers up at me with his big eyes, swollen from crying now. “It’s not your fault… I know about your issues and I should have taken better care.” He looks down before looking back up and laughing a little. “We’re such idiots. What a dramatic misunderstanding.”

I laugh a little too. “Yeah… let’s not turn into the maknaes and be bad at communicating.” We laugh more at that and I cuddle him closer. I breathe in his scent and close my eyes. “I missed you.”

“I’m sorry for making you miss me…”

“Stop apologizing,” I groan. “We’re done.”

“Okay,” he giggles before leaning back to look at me again. “Are we okay now…?”

My lips twitch sadly. “No…” It still hurts that Jinwoo could forget something we always tried to celebrate, even though I can kind of understand why. And that he was with Minho, of all people… Seungyoon and I always have to watch him around our boyfriends because he liked them once (well, we don’t know if he ever liked Taehyun, but still, it was suspicious). “But we will be.”

Jinwoo nods. “I can take that,” he says softly. “I’ll do anything you need to make it up to you and for you to trust me again.”

I suddenly smirk. “Anything?” I whisper suggestively.

He blushes prettily and god, I missed that look on his face. “Y-Yeah…”

I roll over on top of him and lean down to claim him as mine, because that’s what he is. Always. It’ll take some time, and we both have things to work on, but I believe in us. We’ll be okay.

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Feels good to have finally written this :D Did you like it? Don't forget to comment and subscribe to the main story for the rest of these, too :'3