Chapter 1: The Tree that Holds Bittersweet Memories

Flash Back

“She’s a mute.”

“Yeah, she’s a loner.”

“Look at her thick glasses-is she an old lady?”

“I don’t get why she even bothers coming to school.”

These voices I used to hear all the time. They were the voices of students-my own peers. They all dissected me just because I didn’t look like them. I didn’t talk about people behind their backs like them. I didn’t fit in. I remembered I broke down one day after school, on the side of the road. That was when I first met my new neighbor, childhood friend and also…my first love.

“You’re better than them.” He said back then. I remember he left me speechless. His dark eyes glittered in the light of the sun set, the warm tones highlighting his smile. In comparison, his smile outshined the scenery. His warm palm on my head, I never forgot about it. It was at that moment I didn’t mind being bullied at school, because deep down I knew he’d always cherish me. That’s how our friendship started. It was just Dong Young Bae and me-simple Kim Mi Young. I liked it that way.

“Hey Mi Young”, I heard a familiar voice call from behind me followed by warm, firm arms wrapping around me. I looked up to find him smiling at me. He changed a lot in looks from when I first met him during my last year of elementary school. He made me blush no matter what he did or said.

“Young Bae”, I acknowledged him as he chuckled and let go. Now, walking side by side on our usual route home we held a comfortable silence.

“How was your first day of middle school”, he asked idly walking by the weeds on the side of the road.

“It was okay. How was training?” I asked trying to avoid the subject of school.

“I learned a new choreography! I was even complimented on my delivery. Hyung, told me that he would recommend me to some dance companies!” He exclaimed happily. Young Bae, was five years older than me, but sometimes he would joke I was much more mature than him. He was working to become Seoul’s new top idol. I was happy for him. He had a goal and dream to work to while I was still insecure and oblivious of myself. I was just sad, that in time he would have to move away from this small town we lived in now. He would leave and become famous….ultimately, he wouldn’t chose to come back for little socially awkward me. Before, we used to walk together to school but he quit high school to focus on honing his talents. Fortunately, his training and the time I got off of school were the same so we still walked home together. I shouldn’t be too greedy and be ungrateful our time together was cut in half.

“That’s great Young Bae.” I said at the time looking into the sun hiding the tears that had fallen.

“Yah, I can’t believe you still can’t call me Oppa!” He said jokingly oblivious to my true feelings.

“I’ll call you Oppa when pigs fly!” I screamed as I began running forcing myself to laugh. Gladly, Young Bae didn’t notice and thought it was a game. We ran the rest of the way home. We parted ways as I walked into my house while he walked in his home next door.

The next day, I remember how my world shattered. He easily out the color from my world with a smile he said to me, “Mi Young, you wouldn’t believe what happened to me today! My choreographer turned out to be best friends with Yang Hyun Suk of YG ENTERTAINMENT! The president of YG ENTERTAINMENT came here to see me! After I auditioned, he smiled and said we were leaving for Seoul tomorrow! I’m going to become famous!”

I forced a smile as tears fell like raindrops. “I’m really happy for you, Oppa” I said. His face of happiness changed into one of pure shock as I ran away. I remember that day, I never went home. I called mom to let her know I was sleeping over at a friend’s house but really I spent the night in one of my favorite trees in the park. It was there where I cried myself to sleep, Young Bae’s picture withering in my hand’s grip.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

“What’s the matter Mi Young? You look really out of it.” I heard my best friend Ha Young say as I snapped out of my dazed state.

“Mianhe, Ha Young. I’m just tired.” I lied as I returned to eating my chips. Although, she was my best friend since middle school I just didn’t have the heart to tell her about my painful first love.

“Are you sure?” She asked unconvinced but I simply nodded. Dropping the subject, we started to talk about how Ha Young’s four year old brother drew all over her English homework and got scolded. We laughed under the very same tree I cried on two years ago. I got used to the fact how my afterschool activities involved sitting underneath the same tree after school eating snacks and talking.

“I love Big Bang! I listened to their new hit single-‘Lies’-and I am now a fan girl.” She gushed as I nodded emptily. It’s been a while since I last thought of Young Bae. “Oh. I forgot you don’t really listen to Kpop. Am I boring you? Mianhe.” I heard she stop and say causing me to blush. I must seem like a bad friend right now.

“No no. I should be sorry. I tried getting around to listen to some Kpop so we could talk about it some more but I’ve been really busy cooking and cleaning around the house.” I said as I tried to make it up to Ha Young. She was a blessing to me. She was the only other person who accepted me for me and we met shortly after Young Bae left. She helped me out of my slump although she didn’t know exactly what had happened to me…but knowing her sharp nature I knew she knew a vague idea of what really happened.

“Do you want me to come over sometime to help you out?” She asked in a clearly more cheery mood.

“No, it’s okay. I got it. Thank you though.” I said as I finished my chips.

“Oh. It’s getting late, we should get going.” She said as we both glanced at the darkening sky. We parted ways but I didn’t feel the need to get home just quite yet. Today was a Friday after all. There wasn’t a rush since mom and dad didn’t get home until late because the family restaurant closes late today. I started walking back to the tree we sat at earlier and placed my stuff beside its trunk. I remembered what I said earlier to Ha Young and felt a pang of guilt. I lied twice to her. I loved Kpop music. I knew of Big Bang. I also knew Young Bae was in it. I watched all kinds of music programs on TV and researched the latest bands in the hopes of finding Young Bae among them. I wished for his happiness and success even if I would never meet him again and he broke my heart I didn’t regret any moment I shared with him. I stretched out my arms as I danced to no beat but the beat of my heart. I sang Big Bang’s ‘Lies’ in a more R& B tone as each note squeezed my heart a little bit tighter. I danced and sang in front of my favorite tree oblivious to the reality that bound me to this world. Only after the song had ended, I sighed and finally opened my eyes to find a stranger smiling at me widely tears in his eyes. Instinctively I turned around gathered my stuff and tried to make a run for it but a hand inhibited me from doing so.

“Please don’t go.” His voice croaked as I looked back to find the handsome stranger looking at me with pain in his eyes. My body didn’t seem to move at all for I was lost in his eyes. Here a breathtaking guy begging me to stay. Somehow I sympathized with his feelings of hurt. I wondered if this was what I looked like when Young Bae left. Instantly, I unconsciously pulled the stranger into my arms comforting him by patting him on the back. Sobbing filled the air as we stood there under my favorite tree-the tree that held bitter sweet memories. After a while the sobbing completely stopped, a great weight fell on my body as my back fell onto the trunk of the tree and we slid to the ground. I sat there in panic. What do I do now? His head’s on my lap! I thought to myself but forced myself to calm down. I looked down to see the stranger’s sleeping face and smiled. He had a pale, smooth complexion and his features seemed very sharp despite its slight puffiness from crying. He was like an angel… his black hair accented his angular face and yet again, I did something unexpected. I sang a lullaby in a hush tone and his silky hair. It was as if I became a different person around this stranger. His magnetic aura was inevitable. The spring air caressed me tempting me to sleep after a long day of school and soon I did. In the morning, I could say this tree has a new memory.

“Mi Young?” I heard an awful familiar voice call to me as I slowly blinked my eyes open. The sun light filtering brightly into my view, with it the face I always yearned for came into view.

“Is this is a dream?” I mumbled drowsily as I rubbed my eyes. Each time Young Bae’s image didn’t disappear. I looked at him and noted that I never saw him in those clothes. How could I dream of something I never even seen before? I became frustrated as I rubbed my eyes harder.

“Yah! You’re going to claw out your eyes!” He said pulling my hands away from my eyes. I gasped as I looked around. I was under my favorite tree. I thought I went home yesterday? I blinked trying to remember what happened yesterday. I gasped as I remembered I had comforted a stranger last night. I must have fallen asleep. But wait, why is Young Bae here? Isn’t he in Seoul? What kind of dream is this? WAIT WHERE’S THE STRANGER?!  I thought to myself as the weird Young Bae in front of me laughed.

“You haven’t changed a bit Mi Young.” He said as he smiled. His smile still outshined the sun’s light. I smiled unconsciously in response. He quickly reached out and pinched me feeling a sting.

“Yah! That hurt!” I said rubbing the side of my arm. I quickly froze in place, realizing I was really awake.

“See, now you’re awake!” He said as my eyes widened.

“Young Bae, what are you doing here?” I whispered as I felt a cold chill surge through my body. His glittering eyes changed and became serious.

“I came back to see my mom and I thought I come visit the park we passed back in the days,” he said with a weird expression.  My eyes casted down to my shoes, “Don’t get your hopes up. He didn’t come back for you, Mi Young.” I thought to myself.

“Oh that’s nice.” I said as I got up by myself and gathered my things.

“Yeah.” He said as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Sorry, I have to go now.” I said as I began to walk away. I can’t fall for him again… I would only get hurt…he is after all on the high road to fame now-a whole different league.  

“Wait! Do you still live at the same house?” He asked as I stopped and turned around. I nodded and continued walking away. My heart was as heavy as the earth.. this was a feeling I hated the most. I hated it because it gave me false hope of what I could never have. I already knew the consequences all too well.

Taeyang’s POV

I turned around and sighed. After two years of being apart that’s all we could talk about…whoever said time heals wounds is a liar. It’s still awkward as ever. Whatever…I need to find the rest of Big Bang. He thought as he walked to the Inn where he and Big Bang were staying at. I’m grateful they came with me to see my mother although they already knew that from now on we would get less and less vacation days.

“Welcome back, Young Bae” My best friend Ji Yong said from the kitchen as I glanced at the three corpse like bodies lying on the floor of the living room. I snickered before entering the kitchen to find Ji Yong getting our breakfast ready.

“Morning Ji Yong” I said as I got a bottle of water from the fridge.

“You look kind of out of it man. Did you see her?” He asked as I looked down thinking back to my encounter with Mi Young.

“Yeah… it was really awkward and short.” I confessed to my best friend from long ago when I first came to Seoul.

“Ah, mianhe. You said she was your child hood friend, right?” He asked as I nodded.

“Do you like her or something?” He asked again more hesitantly waiting for my answer.

“No, I don’t think I will ever see her more as a friend. It just hurts me that we’ve known each other for more than 6 years now and our friendship seems to be crumbling. ” I said as I rubbed the back of my neck.

“Just give it more push, and don’t give up. You have been really busy the last two years trying to be famous. Now it’s your turn to put your energy into saving your friendship.” He said as I smiled. Ji Yong’s advice was always helpful to anyone. I am glad to have a friend like him.

“Kamsamnida old friend.” I said as I set the table.

“Oh did you hear DBSK was here in town too?” He dabbled as I shook my head. “Manager Lee said he saw DBSK’s manager at the grocery store yesterday and they talked. Apparently, they’re here to support Kim Jaejoong’s new foundation to help the old orphanage where he was brought up.” He informed as I froze. I remembered there was an orphanage not too far off from where I used to live. Who knew another idol came from this small town? I thought to myself as I smiled and resumed setting the table.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________