It was so hard trying to listen to them over a live radio. But you couldn’t help it. After all, it was their showcase and a lot of people really waited for this special event. Your mother is bugging you to sleep for you have a rehearsal the next day, and after that, you have an interview to attend. You couldn’t stay awake for long, but you really want to listen through the whole show, then surf the net for all the possible fan-taken videos of their performance.

You miss him so much that you’ve taken it this far.

You heard a lot of people cheering them on, as Rising Sun commenced. How you wish you would be able to watch this epic too, be there among the thousands and cheer them too.

You laugh at the silliness of your thought. You know that that can never happen, now that you are Jang Riin, and he is Xiah Junsu. It all seemed impossible. Yes, you can cheer him on, but you’ll be at the back stage, and not be like all those fans who cheer their hearts out. You can only smile, and clap –all with sophistication, for you are Jang Riin.

It moved you to tears, for you’ll not be able to see him in the next coming month. You miss him already.

****

“Junsu, we’ll sing your song next,” Jaejoong patted him on the back and gave him the thumbs up. He wanted to call Riin and make sure that she’ll be listening to this song. He had written it for her. He had written it to tell the world that he wanted to protect her. He knew that Cassiopeia would understand, he knew that even though not all of them would be pleased, they would all be happy for him, and that they’d also protect his love.

****

Your phone suddenly rang, and you were tempted to throw it out the window, but seeing who the caller was, your heart burst, and tears fell freely on your cheeks.

“Hello…?”

You let out a small laugh as you hear his voice.

“Junsu oppa,” you started, knowing that he won’t say a thing unless you call his name first.

“Riinie, we’re going to sing now… the song I wrote…”

“I’m listening to it, oppa. Someone’s airing you on a live radio,” you can’t help but smile. He called you all the way from Korea just so he could tell you that they’re about to sing it next.

“Then… then don’t hang-up,” he heaved. “I want you to listen to it through this call.”

“But, oppa! You can’t possibly do that! You know the static will ruin your performance!”

“No it won’t,” you heard a couple of ‘Junsu’s’ across the line. “You’ve got to promise me you won’t hang up, okay, Riin? Promise me that you’ll listen to our song. Our song.”

You heard Yunho call over the line. And you feel as if you were with him. Walking at the backstage, you here all the commotion. You hear all the technical directors shouting at the staff to hurry on with their job. You hear Jaejoong telling Junsu to relax. You hear Yoochun asking him what’s in his ear, and Changmin lamely answering that it’s an earpiece, but then Yoochun’s voice suddenly grew loud as he confirmed it as a phone Bluetooth.

“Yah, Kim Junsu, are you talking to Riin now? Annyeong Riinie!” you laugh at how silly your oppas behave behind the cameras.

“YAH, PARK YOOCHUN! Shut up, Riin can hear you loud and clear!” and you feel giddy as thoughts of Junsu’s greediness wraps you.



“No, I only want Riin in my car; you guys can take Jaejoong Hyung’s car!”

“But we’re four, hyung! And Jaejoong hyung’s car can only sit two people! We won’t fit!” Changmin complained.

“That’s your problem!” and without another word, Junsu drove off, leaving Changmin with his pleading face.

“Junsu oppa, that’s not nice,” you .

“But I want you all to myself, is that wrong? I’ve waited for two years, to finally spend the evening with only you. I won’t let those four ruin it.”

He turns to you and gave out the smile that you fell in love with, so innocent, so pure, so Junsu.

With his free hand, he held yours and he continued to drive through the night.




You wake up from your trance as Junsu called out from the other line. “We’re onstage now –can you still hear me? Please listen to this song Riin.”

You did. As you listen to the song, you can’t help but let your tears fall freely down your cheeks. You try to hold them back, but as Junsu’s voice rang through your ear, there’s just no way you can keep them from falling.



“Although we are not able to see the end,
No matter how bumpy our road is,
I'll promise you, please be mine”
Credits: ginaaax3 @soompi


As the song concluded, you found yourself saying thank you for who knows how many times. Your tears were for joy, joy of being able to meet him. Your tears were for bliss, bliss of falling in love with him. Your tears were for contentment, contentment for having him feel the same way, and much more.

“Riin ah, saranghae.”

****

It’s the 28th of September, and you flew secretly to Korea. You called in your manager saying that you’re sick. You asked your Mom to cover up for you, and you made a promise that you’ll tell her everything when you come back. Nobody on earth knew you flew to Korea alone.

With a hat on, dark sunglasses, and a big coat wrap-around, you ventured the streets of Korea knowing exactly where to go.

You didn’t call anybody about your arrival, not even Junsu. Your sole purpose was set, and that’s about the only thing you’ll do before catching the first plane going back to China the next day. The burden of travelling didn’t bother you. It was a greedy want, and you want it even after two days of the release.

You went into the biggest record store in the city, looked around before going into the ‘New Releases’ section. You grabbed a copy of ‘Mirotic’ and went straight to the cashier. But as luck would have it, you bumped into a lean frame, dressed exactly as you. You said sorry in Mandarin, and bowed a couple of times before realizing that you actually knew the person.

“Jaejoong oppa! I mean, Youngwoong Jaejoong!”

He covered your mouth and dragged you to a corner of the record store.

“Shh!” he ordered. “I’ll sign your copy, but please don’t tell the world I’m here! I’m trying to shop undercover.”

You giggled at him, and actually thought of making him sign your copy. But another thought held you back. Slowly, you tipped you glasses down and winked at him.

“Ri-!”

It was your turn to shush him. Of course, you didn’t want to cause a commotion, not to mention a scandal.

“What are you doing here?” he asked in a whisper. “I thought you’d be in China for another month and a half!”

You put your glasses back in place and moved casually around the store. Jaejoong followed you, as you tried to explain in a whisper.

“I wanted to buy a copy of your new album. I was afraid it’d get sold-out before I come back; but I’m actually surprised they still have a copy around here.”

“They re-stocked,” Jaejoong said pointing to the sign over the counter. “I’ve been coming here since last week. It’s actually the second time they brought in new copies. Two days and two re-stocks, not bad.”

“Really fresh and cocky,” you snickered. But you knew he was right. Every online store you visit says they’re re-stocking and it’ll take another month. Impatient, you went directly to the store who’s fastest in getting the copies, only because it’s also handled by SM Entertainment.

This time around it was you who was following Jaejoong. He was busy browsing the posters in the other side of the shop. You were surprised at how he moved easily around a group of girls drooling at their new poster. You smile as you remember what Junsu told you regarding the poster.



“I didn’t like them in the first place,” Junsu started.”I wonder why they’re going to publish those.”

“Why? Aren’t they beautiful?” You were talking the matter over the phone, while he was sending you the photos from the photo shoot via the internet.”The camera man caught your S-Line.”

“Stop making fun of me, Riin! Anyway, I thought you’d sympathize with me, guess I was wrong.”

You stopped saving the pictures and stood up to lie on your bed. You just love teasing him; he’s such a baby.

“I really like them Oppa, I’m being honest.”

You waited for him to answer, as shuffling from the other end was heard. A door opened and closed. “Well, you better be! I was thinking of you when I did those! You know why? The camera man told me to think of something that’d make me serious, happy, and all sorts of emotion. He said that was the concept. So I thought of you… you’re everything to me, Riin. Everything.”

You fell silent after he said those. You stare at your ceiling, and the wrecked glow-in-the-dark stars that made up your very own Cassiopeia were never as beautiful as that moment.

“YAH, RIIN! Say something; you’re making me nervous!”

“I’m here, oppa. I’m here.”

“YAH KIM JUNSU HYUNG! OPEN THE DOOR! I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM! YOU CAN TALK TO RIIN OUT HERE! Sheesh, I think I also want to have a girlfriend. Hyung gets away with that excuse!”


“Riinie, are you there? Hey, I’m talking to you,” you fell out of your trance as you continue to look at the poster. You broke away only when Jaejoong dragged you to the cahier. “He misses you a lot, you know. He can’t get rid of his phone thinking that you might call any moment and that he’d miss it. So, when are you going to see him?”


“Oh, I’m not planning to,” you answered confidently. “I’m flying back to China tomorrow morning. I’m just going to do a little shopping here, then check in a hotel, or stay over at Yeonhee’s.”

“I see,” he looked disheartened. “Have you been reading the news?”

“Oh, not lately,” you said absentmindedly as you paid for the CD. “I’ve been busy with work.”

“So the news hasn’t reached China yet,” he mumbled, just as the cashier was saying something.

“You might want to come back later this afternoon, Miss,” the girl behind the counter said. “It was rumored that Dong Bang Shin Gi will drop by to do some autograph signing. You might get lucky.”

You thanked the girl and said that you’ll try. You excused yourself and ran up to Jaejoong. He had just finished a conversation in his phone. “What were you saying back there?”

He looked utterly clueless before regaining his composure. “What do you mean? Oh yeah, right, Riin. I have to go back to the company. And if you don’t want me to tell Junsu, you can just say it. I mean for real. ‘Cause well, ahh. Anyway, he really misses you. By the way, I called Yeonhee and told her to come pick you up here. That okay with you?”

You surveyed him cautiously as if not believing anything he said. The worst thing that Jaejoong can do was lie. He was never good at it. “You shouldn’t have! I didn’t want to bother her.”

“She said it’s okay, and she’s actually nearby. Anyway, I really have to go. Bye then!” he closed in and held you into a bear hug, before pinching your cheeks and running though the door.

You went around the store once more, before going out. You receive a message from Yeonhee saying that she’ll be at the café in front of the record shop in ten minutes.


****

“So,” Yeonhee said as you paid for the cap you picked. “Are you going to meet him this afternoon or not? By the way, are you going to wear that cap?”

“I’m thinking about it,” you answered. “I’d really love to surprise him, but then I think it’ll cause some stir-up or what-not. And no, I’m not going to wear this.”

Yeonhee looked at you with interest, and shifted her attention to the cap. It was black, with a golden R in front, inscribed in Old English Style.

“Ehh, giving it to your boyfriend? Anyway, Cassiopeia already knows. No need to hide anymore. Actually, the whole world knows!”

You give her a curious look, “What do you mean?”

The two of you made your way out of the mall, into the afternoon breeze. It has been quite cold as the sun began to set.

“You mean you haven’t heard?” this time it was Yeonhee who looked shocked. “You bought a copy if their new album, right?”

“Yeah, I’m planning to open it when I go back to China.”

“I see,” she finished. “Come on; let’s get back to the record store! Now I’m convinced that you really want and need to see him!”

You let her drag you into her car, and without any complaint you let her drive you back to the record store. Surprisingly, there’s already a big number of fans outside.

“It’s just a rumor, and they’re all here! Anyway, no regrets,” Yeonhee laughed. 

She parked her car just around the corner, and dragged you to a different direction. A few minutes later, you found yourself somewhere near the front, already inside the store. You wonder how on earth Yeonhee managed to cut in the line.

“You have to put your hair up, and tuck it inside your hat,” she ordered. She suddenly turns her head to the girl behind you. “Uhm, excuse me, I promise I’ll get you a signed picture of Junsu, anyway can you please save us this spot? We’ll just run to the restroom.”

The girl looked like she didn’t believe Yeonhee but nodded anyways. 

The two of you literally ran to the lady’s room. Once there, Yeonhee began to tug your hat, made you crouch a little, tie your hair, and finally tuck it inside your hat. She took your glasses and “cleaned” it, before putting it back on you. She fixed your coat before finally giving you the instructions. “Now, Riin, you did bring that cap, right? You have to give that to him some time later though. Anyway, just give him your copy, but look first for his message. But before he signs, tip your glasses, and then –make sure he’s looking at you –before finally letting loose your hair. Hahahaha! He’ll be so surprised I just know he’ll drop his jaw!”

“Alright, Yeonhee, stop day dreaming. Tell me again why I have to do this? It’s not even his birthday!”

“Stop acting like such an insert-curses-here girlfriend, and try to please your man once in a while even if it’s not his birthday! You’ve got to at least show your love, you know.”

“I am! I bought their CD! I flew all the way from China to get a copy! I AM showing my love!”

“Yeah, and then going back without even saying hi, when he has practically told the world a-”

A shriek from outside stopped Yeonhee from saying what she was blabbing about. “Oh, they must be here! Come on!”

****
Yeonhee told you to get in line while she gets a copy herself, but more than fifteen minutes had passed and she isn’t there yet. The lines had divided the moment the boys sat behind a long table in front of the store. You found yourself at the farthest line to the left, Xiah Junsu’s line. You nearly cried when you saw him. Such a long time, and now you’re actually just one of the fans, experiencing how to line up, experiencing the butterflies in your stomach like how a fan girl does when she nears her idol.

You remembered clearly what Yeonhee told you to do.

An assistant shouted next; it was your turn.

“Annyounghaseyo!” Junsu greeted as cheerfully as he can, but you caught the uneasiness in it. He was tired, and sadness engulfed his eyes.

You handed him the album, opened exactly to the place Yeonhee instructed you; you made sure you caught his attention.

“Junsu oppa,” you said just loud enough for him to hear. As if he recognized the voice, he looked at you and you noticed the longing. You tipped you glasses down, and smiled at him.

“Riin ah,” he answered in the softest voice. He signed the album and handed it to you, as he made sure he touched even the tip of your finger. His touch electrifies you. “Please read it here.”

You looked at the part he indicated, and immediately after reading the words, your eyes brimmed with hot tears.

“…and to Jang Riin, who gave me the inspiration to write the song AfterGlow. Thank you for making me feel that I am loved, thank you for being there when I need you, thank you for being the girl I’ve always dreamed to meet… I may not be always beside you physically, but I promise that I will protect you forever…”

And written in his messy Chinese handwriting, “Will you marry me, Zhang Li Yin?” 

A tear fell from your eyes, you hastily tried to wipe them. But when you looked down at your feet, everybody gasped. 

Kim Junsu, with one knee bent, held a ring in front of you.

****

Five years.

Five years passed after that fateful event. You were patiently waiting for Yeonhee to arrive with the note you asked her to get. You left it in your dresser in the hotel room, and while you were insisting to get it, Yeonhee had already run out of the room.

You look at yourself in the mirror, and you see no longer the Jang Riin that cried due to all the critical hate messages that fans gave. No, they weren’t his fans; that’s what Yunho told you. 

Cassiopeia gave you the all out support through their messages, gifts and through supporting the two albums that you released. The others told you that those were Cassiopeia, those were the real Junsu fans.

In the mirror is a stronger Jang Riin, someone who stood through the worst, until finally becoming someone who received the best. 

You smile, as you fight the tears that brimmed in your eyes. You hastily grabbed a tissue as you heard a soft knock.

“Yeonhee?” you called out.

The door opened and in came Yeonhee in a most beautiful dress. She gave you a piece of paper, and you read through it one more time. You got the notes in your head, and even though butterflies were flying in your stomach, you just felt that today would be perfect.

“Are you…?”

You smiled at Yeonhee but before you could answer, another knock was heard and your Mother’s head peaked in.

“Honey,” she said in Mandarin. “Are you ready? The ceremony starts in a minute.”

You nodded your head and she closed the door behind her. As you stood up, you heard Yeonhee gasp.

“You’re the most beautiful bride I’ve ever seen, Riin!”

****

“You are my all my everything
You are the light when the dark closes in
When I reach for you then you are there
To lift me up when I'm down
Never have I had so much faith
Now I feel like my life begins I can hardly wait
Till I see you standing next to me
Then I know that you'll be there…”
Credits: lyricsbox.com

You sang your vow to the surprise of many. A few days before the wedding, you asked Lina if you can sing their song, My Everything for your vow. She clapped her hands and hugged you tight saying that it would be a perfect idea. She called in the others, and they all agreed. Stephanie asked you to her place so that you can practice without anyone interfering. The five of you were the only souls who knew of your surprise.

“Junsu oppa, you are my all, you are my everything. Thank you for being that one person I’ve waited all my life…”

The ceremony concluded, with tears and laughter. As you made your way down the altar, someone took your arm gently and spun you around. In his arms, you could see clearly what was written in his eyes.

“Riin, I’m so happy that I asked you to marry me that day. Now I feel like the luckiest man in the world. Thank you. God only knows how much I love you.”

He searched your eyes for a whole minute, until his lips finally touch yours, in a deep, passionate kiss.

-----

a/n:

Just want to share this story in this community. i wrote it a few years back and revised it a little. Just a little. HAHA. Hope you guys like it! Let me know your thoughts!