Days, weeks, months passed by. You thought that you’d be in pain and constantly crying but you didn’t. Instead you just kind of turned numb. You became even more wary of guys. You felt no real emotion. Everything just turned bleak and grey.

You thought of Yongguk often. Half of the time you missed him and the other half you cursed him into the fieriest depths of hell. But you couldn’t bring yourself to hate him No matter how much you cursed him and wished you never met him, your heart still beat a little faster at the thought of him.

Jae saw the change in you and broke his heart. He regretted his actions every day. He missed the old you who would greet him at home with a high five or by jumping on his back. After the incident, all you did was give a bleak ‘hello’ and retreat into your room. He wanted to just come out with the truth: Yongguk never said anything to him and he fabricated that lie because he didn’t trust Yongguk. But Jae couldn’t bring himself to confess. Every time he tried, the vision of anger and hatred directed at him from you was too much. So instead Jae tried his best to make you feel better but there was only so much he could do.

Neither Jae nor you heard from Yongguk that day on. Jae tried looking for Yongguk the first month since the ‘breakup’ in hope that Yongguk could make his sister happy again but it was like he disappeared from thin air. He tried calling Yongguk and Yongnam but neither answered his calls.

Yongguk had entered TS entertainment. He trained there and began to learn how to produce music from the producers already established there. Training was successful and he debuted in a group called BAP with five other guys. And every day he thought of you.

Even though trainee life was difficult and strict, he found solace whenever he thought of you. Of your smile. Your laughter. He’d look at pictures he had stolen of you during your daily meetings. He took one of you every time, never missing a single day. His favorite was one of you leaning against the wall, one foot crossed behind the other, while twirling a record between your hands and smiling at him because he called you “birdie”, his nickname for you.

It would be a lie if he said he thought only of you after the ‘breakup’. He tried to get over you, even dating his labelmate Song Jieun but it didn’t work out in the end. He found himself comparing Jieun to you. He found himself comparing every girl he met to you.

In truth, Yongguk drunk dialed you a couple times (even though he swore he wouldn’t bother you as long as you wanted it that way) but apparently your line wasn’t in service. That’s when he knew he really lost all contact with you. It was proof that you wanted nothing to do with him, even changing your phone number. Instead, Yongguk busied himself with producing music and pushing the company and his fellow members to keep promoting, even if it was taxing, so he could get his mind off of you. He was willing to do anything.

Worried about his health, the members of BAP tried to convince Yongguk to rest, take a couple months off but each time he refused, claiming he needed to work on another track or he needed to perfect this dance. Yongguk had found the perfect balance, he busied himself late into the night until he was so exhausted he fell asleep the second his head hit his pillow then repeated this cycle again that way he had no time to think about you. It worked for him. One member in particular had a vague idea why his hyung acted the way he did.

Moon Jongup had been the longest trainee along with Yongguk before their debut. During late night practices, Jongup would see the older male look at some pictures of a girl. He never saw her face clearly and never asked Yongguk about it because he believed in personal privacy. He’d hate it if someone asked him about a girl in his life and he wasn’t prepared to share the news which is why he never interfered in the personal lives of his band mates, hoping they’d reciprocate the gesture. Which they did and for that he was grateful. Especially because he had met a girl and have been meeting her for six months now.

He met her at a café he went to, in disguise, and sat at a table facing where she was sitting. She seemed very preoccupied, biting her lip as she typed away on her laptop. He didn’t pay much attention to her in the beginning, he was more focused on his drink and the thought of meeting a friend he hadn’t seen in a long time. The girl sighed loudly, leaning back into her chair and folding her hands behind her head while looking at her laptop in contempt. He watched her furrow her eyebrows before standing up and walking outside, stretching. His eyes followed her as she took out a cigarette and a lighter, puffing away at the cancer stick.

He raised his eyebrows, surprised to see a female smoking. It was common in Korea for males to be smoking but females smoking was a bit of a taboo. Yet there she stood, unflinching against the glares she received from males and females alike passing by. A small grin formed on his face, admiring such a confident girl like that. She took one last puff before stubbing out the fire and throwing the cigarette into the garbage can. Jongup turned his eyes away as she entered the café again, sitting down and glaring at her laptop once more.

His phone vibrated, an incoming text from his friend apologizing that he couldn’t make it out because of his parents who had given him an errand he couldn’t refuse. Jongup replied back saying that it was fine and that they could meet up another time. He knew he could just leave but decided to stay and watch the mysterious girl who continued to furiously type away at her laptop. He stayed there for a couple hours before standing up to leave when coincidentally the girl also stood up, packing her things. The both of them left at the same time, Jongup holding the door for her.

She looked at him warily but thanked him anyways before walking to the right. Jongup followed, not on purpose but because his dorm happened to be the same way. He stayed behind her a few blocks before she turned around, staring at him with cold, lifeless eyes.

“Are you following me?” She asked plainly in a monotone voice. Jongup looked at her, stunned.

“No, I live in this direction.”

“Really? Because we’ve been going the same way for a few blocks now.” She said skeptically. Jongup gave her one of his famous smiles and shook his head.

“Yes, sorry if it seems that way. If you like, I could go a different way.” She looked at him suspiciously.

“You would do that?”

“Yes.”

“Just because I asked you to.”

“Well, yes.”

“Why?” Jongup pondered a few seconds. Why indeed.

“If it makes you uncomfortable then I shouldn’t be doing it. I don’t mind walking a different way either.” She watched him for a few seconds before nodding her head. She turned around and continued walking forward. Jongup watched her, unsure of what to do. “Do you want me to walk a different way?” He called out after her. She stopped and turned around to face him.

“No. That’s fine.” She waited until Jongup had caught up to her before walking again. They walked in silence. Jongup thought about the possibility that she might know him but ruled against it. She seemed to think he was just some random guy on the street and he was immensely grateful for that.

“Do you mind if I take a cigarette?” She said, looking at the male next to her. He shook his head while she proceeded to take it out and took a drag. Jongup watched her, still fascinated by her confidence.

“Do you care that people glare at you?” He asked, genuinely curious as to what she thought.

“No. I have no reason to. What they think is up to them, who am I to judge them?” She said before inhaling once more. She looked over to him to see a smile gracing his face. She looked at him funnily. “Why are you smiling?” She questioned, finding this male peculiar.

“I admire you for thinking that way. That kind of thinking will get you far in life.” He replied before smiling wider. She looked at him, before smiling herself. Jongup liked the way her smile looked on her, it was beautiful.

“What’s your name?” She asked, extending the hand that didn’t hold the cigarette out towards him.

“Moon Jongup. And you?” He replied, taking her hand in his. She was soft but had a firm grip. His heart beat a little faster than usual.

“Cho Sae Hee. It’s nice to meet you.”

Jongup *sighs* They finally meet!! We'll see Sae Hee's persepective in the next chapter but what did you guys think? Sorry for the late update but I wanted to put this chapter up, even if it's late. Let me know what you think in the comments!