"It's cold." Sunggyu says under his breath, his breath forming wisps of smoke in the air. It is cold outside; Seoul has never been warm in December, after all. Sunggyu's boots shovel the snowy sidewalks as he trudges forward. He passes display windows lined with tinsel and other festive decorations; most of the shops have been closed for a while now, only illuminated by the dimly lit street lamps.

Even the most remote places in Seoul are usually crowded on Christmas' Eve, but tonight its as if the whole city has gone to sleep early. Sunggyu walks on and on, his hands shoved deep into his coat pockets -- supposedly the purpose of his walk is to clear his mind of all the fog  and haze that's built up over the months-- and his nose burried in his little cotton scarf. The scarf is too short to be wraped around his neck twice, and the cotton is thin, too, bu Woohyun gave it to him last  Christmas, so Woohyun wear it anyway. 

"It's freaking cold." Sunggyu says again; something in his voice spells out desperation and if anyone had heard him they would have heard it, too (but there's no one left to hear him).  It's Christmas' Eve and nobody is left to care. It's moments like these when Sunggyu can't help but feel despair. Not even the empty streets or his empty apartment could make him feel as numb as he does now (and maybe it's the cold but Sunggyu doesn't consider that; the feeling is all too familiar to be only the cold). Sunggyu's still walking, wondering, he trudges through the snow further and further from where he came-- Sunggyu's wandering, he is. A walk without purpose. He comes across a fountain still bubbling with water, even at this ungodly hour. He stops in his tracks, then, and looks up at the stars.

If there were a shooting star, now, he'd wish for a dime (then, maybe Woohyun would come back) but there aren't many visible stars in Seoul to begin with; much less, after Woohyun left. 

Sunggyu shuts his eyes and pictures a time when things were right. A time when Woohyun would still walk beside him during the harsh winters; all seasons for that matter. He'd have to be a child, then, when he and Woohyun first encountered each other. Sunggyu can remember that Woohyun was shorter than he was and even after all the summers they were together Woohyun never grew taller than Sunggyu. 

"It's getting colder." Sunggyu'd say, a week into winter. 

"That's usually how winter works." Woohyun would've remarked shuffling along side Sunggyu, smirking at his friend.

Of course, Sunggyu would've scowled at him for it.

"No one asked you." He'd say.

Would've. Sunggyu muses. There are a thousand things and more he would've done if he had had the chance. He opens his eyes and looks up at the  vast sky again; he searches for a single star and even, though, anyone else could have easily counted ten, Sunggyu finds nothing. The brightest star isn't shining tonight, Sunggyu thinks. He's dead to the world and all the thick blankets of snow covering it.

"Would've." Sunggyu says out loud just to assure himself it is only a possibility. 

Sunggyu would've been walking with Woohyun now if it wasn't for something as trivial as death.

I would've gladly taken your place. Sunggyu thinks and wishes upon a star that it were true.