Baekhyun was standing in front of the mirror, adjusting his crooked black tie to its rightful place. His face was gloomy, even more gloom than the darkness of the night. He slowly out on his black blazer, contradicting to his white dress shirt. He took his iPhone 6 and wallet into his pocket before walking to the front door. He put on his black leather shoes, his sad looks still there on his face.

His friends were already outside, waiting for him patiently for 30 minutes.

They knew he had a rough time at the moment.

“Hey, ready to go?”, Junmyeon asked with a small smile on his face. Baekhyun just nodded his head and followed all of them into the car.

The car drifted away to a destination.

The destination where it would take Baekhyun’s heart away.

Park Chanyeol’s funeral.

Baekhyun arrived at the memorial hall. He could see some familiar faces and unfamiliar ones, paying their last respects to the deceased Park Chanyeol. Chanyeol was well-known for his friendliness, which caused the endless of people coming in and out of the hall to meet him for the last time.

“Hyung .. You’re here ..”, Byunghun greeted him as he exited the hall. He gave Baekhyun a warm hug, knowing that the lad needed it the most at the moment. Baekhyun hugged him back before quickly pulled out as he had many others to greet.

Byunghun bid him goodbye and Baekhyun went to the other side of the hall, avoiding the memorial part as many as he could as he was not ready to say goodbye to him.

“How long are you going to avoid it??It’s almost over, Baek ..”, Suho said to him. Baekhyun let out a heavy sigh before making his way to the memorial hall.

The hall was almost empty, only left with Chanyeol’s mother and sister. Baekhyun politely bowed to them. Chanyeol’s mother gave him a hug before quickly retorted away and left the hall with her daughter.

She knew Baekhyun needed some time alone with her son.

They were a couple for 4 years after all.

Baekhyun’s eyes fell on the picture in front of him. His façade finally crumbled down as his tears fell down his cheeks. He knelt in front of the lifeless portrait, apologizing over and over again.

I’m sorry, Chanyeol ..

I should’ve said yes ..

I really should’ve said yes ..

I’m sorry, Chanyeol ..

I love you ..

Baekhyun was laying on his bed. It’s been a dreadful day to him. He was exhausted, but he couldn’t sleep. He missed the warmth beside him. The warmth that always accompanied him for four years had gone, leaving him in coldness for the rest of his life.

He suddenly thought of his life before Park Chanyeol happened.

Baekhyun still remember the first time he met Chanyeol. It was autumn 4 years ago, where the coldness and emptiness in his heart felt even worse. He was calmly enjoying his time in the jazz club while sipping his tropical drink slowly. He looked around, eyeing all kinds of human there. Some were having a date and some were just alone like him.

Then, a person came on the stage. It was the club’s owner a.k.a bartender that Baekhyun knew very well. He knew Kyungsoo during their school days. Both of them loved music as much as Kyungsoo loved his Kim Jongin and Baekhyun loved his pretty fingers.

Kyungsoo decided to open a jazz club with some help from his father instead of continuing his studies in university. As he said, he wasn’t born to sit in a big hall, listening to those boring lectures that he knew his brain wouldn’t be able to inhale them.

“We have a special performance tonight ..”, he simply said. Then, he got off the stage after he put a chair at the middle of the small stage. Baekhyun drifted his sight away for a while, until a deep voice echoed across the club, making his eyes fell on the stage once again.

“H-Hi everyone .. I hope you all will enjoy this song ..”, he nervously said as he picked up the guitar next to him. He cleared his throat for a while and Baekhyun swore that he saw the male glanced at him for a brief moment.

He looked at me, right??

Baekhyun decided to brush he thought away and started to focus on the male on stage.

Party time – there’s no one I know

It’s boring, I’m just here sitting

Bartender, what should I drink?

Yeah, give me that cause it’s red

The music changed, up tempo

But I’m still at a down tempo

No, I’m not going to drink alcohol

I just picked this because I liked the color

Baekhyun was mindblown. His deep voice was already a complete contrast with his cute face, and now his singing really amazed Baekhyun to the core.

It’s like you’re there but you’re not

With a disappointed heart, I just looked at you

I see through U See through U

I see through U See through U

Baekhyun couldn’t help but to let his gaze fell on the singer. His eyes sometimes met the male’s, but Baekhyun was too busy fanboying over his deep, y voice in his head to notice the piercing gaze the boy gave him.

His pearl white sets were shining under the spotlight, making him looked alluring even more to Baekhyun. Somehow, he was interested to know him more.

One step to the left (not there)

Back four steps again (not there)

Two steps to the right but you’re not there

Three steps again to the front

I can’t see you, my head is hurting

It’s like rush hour at a busy intersection at the club

So crowded, so busy around her

Oh man!This is totally minded!

Baekhyun’s heart literally gone wild when the guy rapped skilfully. His eyes met the guy’s once again and to his surprise, the guys actually winked at him.

He freakin’ winked at me!

Baekhyun squealed internally, even though his face showed the complete opposite.

It’s a strange feeling

My body feels light

No, I’m not drunk

Whoa, who’s that?

I’m just curious

She’s so fine

I’ll regret it if I lose her

Right then, Baekhyun was disappointed. He assumed that the guy was into girls. His excited eyes died instantly. He wanted to leave right away when he was stopped by a waiter. He handed him a folded paper and left. Feeling curious, he quickly unfolded the paper.

I see through U

Park Chanyeol

His eyes bulged in shock. He quickly glanced at the stage, only to find the singer was walking like a model to him. He smiled widely until he reached Baekhyun’s table and took a seat, not even asking Baekhyun’s permission.

“I guess you got my note?”, he said softly and Baekhyun’s heart palpitated abnormally once again. His mind was completely blank, his lips was completely numb. He couldn’t find any words to say to the boy. He just nodded his head and showed him the paper in his hand.

“I’m Park Chanyeol ..”, he said, eyes still twinkling in excitement. Baekhyun smiled to him and that night, Baekhyun wasn’t feel cold or lonely or empty at all for the first time in his life.

Six months later, Chanyeol finally had the guts to propose Baekhyun to be his boyfriend. Baekhyun still remembered the day vividly. His tears started to form as his mind played the scene like an old movie.

It was just another day of hanging out, as Baekhyun thought it would be. As usual, they would be going to Kyungsoo’s jazz bar since it’s Friday night. Baekhyun was in his favourite blue sweatshirt and worn-out jeans, waiting for Chanyeol at the seat where they first looked into each other’s eyes.

Without Baekhyun ordering it first, his favourite tropical drink was served, along with a folded paper. He looked up, only to find a suspiciously grinning Do Kyungsoo. He raised his eyebrow, asking him about the mysterious paper. Kyungsoo just put his index finger on his heart-shaped lips before playfully winked at him and walked away to serve other customers.

Baekhyun opened the folded paper.

Listen well ..

Chanyeol

“This is for you, Byun Baekhyun ..”, the deep voice that made Baekhyun’s heart palpitated crazily echoed inside the club. The sound of the audience clapping woke Baekhyun up from his little daydream.

Chanyeol cleared his throat and his started to pluck his guitar, serenading a song that Baekhyun liked a lot. He had once told him that he liked the song so much.

He must have worked hard practicing this song ..

Chanyeol’s voice was actually too deep to sing the song, but Baekhyun couldn’t care less. At that moment, the world was stuck in time to Baekhyun. He could only see Chanyeol and only his voice was audible to him.

It always appeared before me

Your face, I remember

My heart that stopped short

You spitefully took my disfunctional heart

And with your bright smile

That's how you easily opened my heart

Baekhyun was melting at his seat. His eyes never left the boy, who he had loved from the first time they met. Chanyeol looked at him with his emotion-filled eyes. Baekhyun knew, the younger also felt the same to him. He smiled at him, signing that he knew his intention serenading the song to him.

And now like breathing,

if you were to always rest by my side

if you were to always remain this way

nothing better nothing better than you

nothing better nothing better than you

You’re the best for me, Park Chanyeol ..

From afar, he could see Chanyeol’s eyes. He mouthed ‘I love you’ to him. Chanyeol was shaken for a bit, but still managed to sing coolly to the end. Baekhyun chuckled at his cuteness. He continued listening to him, singing along with him in his heart.

And now like a dream, My heart

in your embrace, is held still

Without awakening for a single moment,

I dream an endless dream

Chanyeol sang until the end. Then, a thunder of claps echoed, ending Baekhyun’s happy dream. Baekhyun looked around and saw everyone was clapping loudly and whistling. And then, he realized that Chanyeol was walking his way to him, looking ever so handsome like a model.

It was like a déjà vu.

Except for that moment, there’s no more folded paper with cheesy notes scribbled on it. Instead, Chanyeol crashed his lips on Baekhyun’s, making him gasped in shock. Soon, he also fell into the sea of Chanyeol’s love and responded to his kiss.

“Will you be my boyfriend?”, he proposed as he broke the kiss. With a slight tears in his eyes, Baekhyun nodded his head and crashed his lips on the taller once again. He circled his arms on Chanyeol’s neck, pulling him closer, deepening their kiss. The loud cheering was ignored as once again, Baekhyun felt like the world was stuck in time.

On their fourth year together, Baekhyun was shocked with another surprise.

Chanyeol proposed to him.

At a place with such a picturesque view of Seoul's nightlife under the moonlight with a playlist of Baekhyun's favourite songs, Chanyeol asked him to be his forever.

It was exactly how Baekhyun wanted to be proposed. It was kind of surprising since he had never talked about marriage with Chanyeol. The proposal was a shock to him.

Baekhyun was shocked, very shocked.

Yes, he loved Chanyeol so much. More than anything.

But he wasn’t ready. He felt like Chanyeol was rushing in their relationship. It’s not like he didn’t want to be with Chanyeol.

He could never imagine himself being with someone other than Chanyeol.

He loved that boy more than he thought he would ever be.

But marriage at the age of 25?

It definitely wasn’t on Baekhyun’s bucketlist.

He was sorry to break Chanyeol’s heart. He apologized and kissed the boy dearly, hoping that the boy wouldn’t think that Baekhyun didn’t love him.

I need more time, Chanyeol ..

He said ‘no’ and Chanyeol said he was okay with it. Even though he didn’t show it, Baekhyun knew he wasn’t okay with it.

“I will say ‘yes’ .. but not now, okay?”, Baekhyun pleaded. Chanyeol just nodded his head and flashed his happy virus smile.

Baekhyun smiled in relief and pulled Chanyeol into his embrace. That night, they made love to each other, forgetting the heartbreaking scene that Baekhyun would never thought it would hunt him to his last breath.

A month later, Baekhyun was awakened with a phone call. Without waiting for the anxious voice on the phone, he quickly his television.

It was 9 o’clock news.

Usually, it was only bad news on 9 o’clock news.

‘Flight KE 115 from Incheon was reported crashed on 3.46 pm this evening. It is said that there were no survivors from the crash. We will bring you the updates regarding the news later. Our deep condolences to the family of the deceased passengers ……’

Baekhyun went numb. The remote control was lying helplessly on