"Grrrrr....grrrrr..."My phone vibrated. I picked out my phone from my pocket and my eyes widen and my lips started to curl up at the edge when I saw the words on the screen.

From: Sungminnie Oppa ^^v
"Annyeong my favourite dongsaeng~
Have you been doing well recently?
It had been so long since we had met!
Are you free tonight? Let's go eat together~! :D"

Without hesitation, I immediately replied him.

To: Sungminnie Oppa ^^v
"OPPA! You're finally back! ^^
Annyeong~ Yup, I've been good as usual~ ㅋㅋㅋ
Sure thing! Let's meet tonight at the usual place?"

Vibration was felt again after a minute.

From: Sungminnie Oppa ^^v
"Sure! Seeyou tonight~! ^^"

It had been really long since I've last met him.
Sungmin was one year older than me. He was my senior in high school. Our meeting was like one of those cliché plot in manga or anime.

It was during year one when i first saw him. As I was late for my school, I ran as fast as I could to school but tripped and fell flat onto the ground. "Ouchhhh!" It was so painful. I tried using my hands as support to lift my body up, but failed to do so as i had sprained my arm. "Are you okay?" a sudden voice was heard. Searching for the owner of the voice, I looked up and saw a boy wearing the same uniform as me. He had a pair of doe shaped eyes, black and short hair and a very warm smile. He stretched out his hand to offer his help. After making sure that I was able to stand properly, he helped me gathered all the textbooks that was scattered all on the floor and passed them to me. "Thank you very much" I thanked him as I took the books from his hand, gave a bow and limped off to lighten the pain on my slightly scratched knee. "Erm, if you don't mind sharing a bike with me, i can give you a lift to school." he asked after noticing that I have difficulty walking. I hesitated for a while as I felt that it was not very nice to trouble other, moreover twice in a row. "Don't worry, it's free!" he joked, "and if you take so long to decide, we will both be late for school!" And so, I hopped onto his bike and reached school just on time. I thanked him for another time and dashed to meet my friends. And I realised i forgot to ask him what his name was. Nevermind, don't think I'll have the chance to meet him too, will I?

His face kept appearing in my head throughout the periods of lessons. I could not stop thinking about him, was curious and wanted to find out everything about him. It was the first time I have such an encounter with someone and it was indeed one which made my heart fluttered.     

"Ding dong ding dong~" the school bell sounded. School finally ended and students are all heading towards the main gate. So did I. The time to go home was always the thing I look forward to everyday in school. As i passed the main gate, someone unexpected tapped my shoulder. It was him. My heart skipped a beat upon seeing him. "Hello, I think you've dropped this this morning" he said as he held up a handmade pink rabbit keychain. Then I realised I had dropped it this morning without realising it wasn't hanging on my bag as I was too preoccupied thinking about other stuffs. "Ah, yes! This was a keychain that I had made... Thank you for returning it back to me after finding it.." "You made it? Really?" he asked with his eyes brightened and I nodded in response. "If you like it... then you can have it!" I said as I smiled at him. I can tell from his expression that he wanted to take it but felt bad for taking it, and it was really obvious that he like it a lot. "As a gift to thank you for helping me this morning" I added and shoved the keychain into his hand. "Thank you so much!! I will treasure it a lot!" He said with the brightest smile that I had ever seen.

Ever since that day, I got closer with him each day. His name is Sungmin, Lee Sung Min. He lives in my area too and so we often meet up to go to school together on his bicycle and will go home together too. We often have lunch at a nearby food stall before heading home as both of us love the kimchi ramyeon there very much. The price was affordable and the ajumma there always give us extra chicken. He was the band leader of a band he formed in school with his classmates too. He have a really good voice and can also play the guitar and piano very well. I had seen him perform once in the one of the school's celebration and he looked really charming. When I am down, he will be there to help wipe my tears away, always. There was once when I was wronged and scolded harshly by my group mate, he helped me to fight back, reprimanded them and consoled me.  He will always teach me values of life and had always been my role model who i will never get tired to stick around with. He was good in his studies too. I could always approach him for help whenever I had difficulties in my homework. He would teach me patiently and make sure that I understand the topic. He was always so warm and caring that I start to fall for him. He is just so perfect to me.

I don't know how it started but when I'm moving from one class to another, I would deliberately walk the long way so that I could walk past his classroom. Unknowingly, my eyes will immediately search for his figure and feel super happy and energised when I get to see him but depressed and disappointed when he's not in sight. His smile would always make me feel better when I'm sad and my heart flutter. Just a simple pat on my head from him can make my day. I begun wanting to know him more, about his everything.

Once, i overheard his conversation with his band mates when I was about to enter their room which they usually held their band practice. "Sungmin ah, it's your turn to say! So what is your ideal type?" My ears widen, trying to hear what he was saying. "Hmmm, someone who I can hug in my arms, kind hearted and is cute. It's good if she can cook and sing well too." "Then what about your dongsaeng? The one who is always with you. Are you together?" "Ah, I just treat her as my dongsaeng, my favourite dongsaeng." he replied and my heart broke into a million pieces. In his eyes I'm just a little sister and nothing else. It hurts so much to hear these words coming out from his mouth. My heart had never felt this way before and it feels like I'm being rejected even before I had confessed. That night, I've isolated myself from everyone and just spent the whole day hiding under my blanket, and tears just flowed like they will never stop. It just felt so pain.

However, I'm not going to give up. Oppa don't like people who give up easily. Although he don't love me but I will still treat him as the most precious person in my heart forever. I just want to love him. From that day onwards, I begun to learn to cook all sorts of dishes from recipes, especially pumpkin related dishes because sungmin loves pumpkin very much. Time files really fast and soon, it was the day Sungmin graduated from school. I had spent the whole morning on that day to prepare pumpkin soup which I had finally mastered after so long and some cookies to congratulate him on his convocation. Excitedly, I kept them into pink containers, placed them into my bag and went to attend his graduation ceremony.

When I reached school, my eyes immediately searched for that familiar figure. He was standing and talking with his friends when I approached him. "Sungmin oppa, congratulations for graduating! Here are some things I've made for you and.." before I could complete my sentence, he interupted, "Gomawoyo.." he said as he pulled me to the side. "I feel that I should tell you this. Oppa is going overseas tomorrow to further my studies, I know it's quite sudden but it was also partly because of my father's job that my whole family will be moving to New Zealand. I don't know when I will be able to come back too. Mianhae." all his words were like needles that were pricking my heart. He was going to leave tomorrow and I just got to know the news a day before. It was too sudden. I could not even have the time to digest everything. I felt angry that he had not told me earlier but the sadness of not having him by my side had dominated. Not wanting to make him feel sad, I forced a smile, handed him the gift and said "take care!" before excusing myself from him to hide in the toilet. I could not send him off as he was taking a midnight flight and my parents forbid me from going. But i really need to confess to him now, or i will never have the chance to do so. After rounds of pleading and begging, my parents finally agreed to let me go. But it was too late as the flight had already departed when I reached the airport. Tears of regret and sadness filled my eyes and I just stood there. Why didn't you wait for me? And so we had lost connection with each other since then.

It had been one and a half years since I have got any news from him.

After changing into my favourite dress, I put on some simple make up and wore my watch. My heart could not stop beating faster each minute as the time of the meet up was drawing near. When i arrived at the food stall which we used to hang out, he was already there. He looked more mature now, his chubby cheeks are still seen and so is his precious smile. But he looked taller and more well built now. He wore a black shirt with a "S" printed on it, his favourite jeans and a denim jacket. His fashion sense had become better, I thought, remembering how a he used to be a fashion terrorist. He waved to me and I did the same back. We ordered our usual kimchi ramyeon and had so much fun reminiscing the past. After dinner, both of us went to the nearby park for a walk.

The park was so quiet at night. There is only a few couples around which made me feel like I'm one of them. Although time has passed but my love for sungmin had never changed. Not at all. Looking at his side profile, the perfect jawline, the small yet sharp nose, the pretty long eyelashes and the pouty lips. My heart just beats faster than usual. Both of us walked without talking but the silence with sungmin is always comfortable. But he broke the silence.

"Are you still alone now?’ he asked, "There is someone that I would like you to see, if you're still.." This came too abrupt  Looking at his worried face, I just laughed in response, hiding the sudden pain on my chest that was felt. "Oppa, I am loving someone, I have someone to love." I cut of his sentence, not letting him complete his words. " I continued, "Do you know that I do also have a great lover? Someone that I cherish so much that I had to hide? That person, only I can see him. He is only visible to my eyes and I will keep him locked in my heart forever." As I said these words to him, tears started to form and fill my eyes. I turned around, back facing him, not wanting him to see the tears that was rolling down my cheeks. "That person is you" I whispered and ran off. My legs just move involuntarily. I was completely clueless of where I will be going, but at the point of time, I just want to keep myself as far as possible from him. I don’t want to have him, I don’t want to be greedy, I just want to love him. I cannot let him see myself in this state. Am I a burden to him? He don't want me anymore? Negative thoughts and endless questions started to fill me head.

"BEEEEEEPPP" a sudden loud horn was heard and it came from a lorry which was moving at a fast speed towards me. It was then that I realised I was on the road. Not knowing how to react, i shut my eyes tightly and used my arms to shield my head, hoping that the lorry will stop. At that moment when I thought I will be knocked down by the lorry, I felt a strong grip on my arms that pulled me away. It was Sungmin. "Why are you running away? Do you know how difficult it was for me to chase you? And you almost got knocked down by a lorry! Are you a Babo?!" he scolded me, looking very worried. "I'm... sorry..." I cried, covering my face with both of my hands. Upon seeing me cry, he changed his tone immediately. " Ahhh, sorry, I didn't meant to scold you but I was too worried. Are you okay?" he asked with a smile on his face. His voice was so gentle which made me tear even more knowing that it will never belong to me. His smile was so sweet and precious. Even though I wanted to believe that this smile was just for me but it probably isn't right? But still... just maybe.. 

Looking straight into his eyes, i gathered all my courage. i could not hold back my feelings anymore.  "Oppa, can you see I am not alone? So don’t worry about me so much. I’ll promise i will introduce him to you someday." Tears filled up in my eyes again. "That person is you.."  I finally said it out. I finally confessed. "It's okay, I don't need you to love me back but please don't ask me to see someone else.. please". I said, knowing that he will never feel the same way as i did. I cannot put him be in a difficult spot. I'm suppose to bring happiness to him but now I am adding on to his troubles. When I was about to leave, he pulled me back and held me in his embrace. "Babo, don't cry. I didn't meant to hurt you. I had always loved you and wanted to protect you. But i'm scared that you will never feel the same way so i decided to hide this feeling in my heart. But I'm afraid that you're unable to find someone you like because I seemed to be obstructing you from knowing other guys so i asked you those question. I'm sorry." he said as he wiped my tears with his delicate fingers. "You see, this keychain is still with me till now" he said those words as he took out his phone from his bag with the pink rabbit keychain hanging. "It always made me feel that you are with me when we are apart" he added as he held my head softly and pressed his lips over mine, so careful yet gentle and sweet. I burst out into tears again. But this time, it was tears of happiness.

"I love you" he said.

"I love you too" I replied as I hugged him tightly.

Then he let go of the hug and  flicked his finger on my forehead.
"Next time don't dash across the road okay! It's dangerous!" he scolded imitating the tone and expression of my mum.

I nodded and smiled back at him. "But I won't be afraid anymore because you will always be by my side. You will never leave me again right?"

"Yes, I promised." he said as he kissed my forehead.