As I scroll down on my Facebook newsfeed. I saw something    that made my heart cringe.

  Or even break a little.


  That picture of him and her. They look so happy together. They  were looking in each others eyes full of love. They look so  amazingly beautiful together or even perfect to be precise. And  then there's me.

 

As a tear slowly stream down my cheek, many thoughts came rushing to my mind.

As if it was running 1,000,000 miles per seconds.


I stared at that picture longer than I should have.
 

.. That could have been me. I could have been the one whose smiling. And laughing. I could have been happy. I could have been.. I could have been...
 

 The pain overcame me once again.
 As if a cloud of shadow casted over me.
 I clenched my heart.
I bit my bottom lip. /
         

I roughly open the drawers. I unscrew the top of my bottle. I told myself to stop, but I couldn't. I just can't. I couldn't bring myself up to do it.

I shake the bottle.
     One pill.
     Two pills.
     Three pills.
      Four pills.
     Five pills.

I counted each one of them until I lost count. I hover my hand over my mouth. I swallow all the pills in my hand.

They slide down my throat harshly leaving a dry scratch, but I was completely used to it. I actually loved that feeling. It made me feel the weight on my shoulder lifted a bit. Like on Cloud 9.
 safe and secure.
 

Finally, the pain is numb. Subside. I smile. Slowly my head and heart stop throbbing. My breathing is coming to a point of steadiness. My eye lids are becoming heavy. Closing in on me. I lay on my bed, calmly straightening my back. Relaxing my tired self.

                   The tears stop flowing.
                            At last.
                  I ultimately felt nothing.
   '

Once again. I dreamt of his face.

His beautiful features. His charming eyes. His femmine nose.

His kissable lips.

Those lips that comfort me with lies and venom.

His poisonous venom that kill me.

Even when I'm dreaming, his presence wouldn't leave me alone.
 He was smiling at me, with his full of charisma-self. So much feeling and passion can be seen.
 

But was it really true?<