I hear your unwritten songs almost every day, your voice coming from all directions.  I don’t think anyone else hears them. I seem to be the only one who’s paying attention to you. All your songs about love and loss I hear them, because they speak to me. The others don’t hear them because they have not lost anyone yet. But we’re the same, in love with someone who’ll never love us back. For you it’s Baekhyun and for me it’s you.  I remember how you two used to be best friends but then he got a girlfriend and you found out that you had absolutely no chance of making him yours. It’s sad really to watch you smile like everything’s okay but I see that you miss him. You miss him so much and it breaks my heart whenever I’m in the library and I find you crying behind a bookshelf. I’m so sorry that you have to go through that but then I remember that I’m a lot like you. The only difference is that I never had you near me. You’ve always been so far away, so unattainable.

               The year that we finally have a class together is the year that I get to sit behind you. I get to look at you up close and I get to hear you speak as the teacher asks you questions or when we have free time I listen to you talking to those around you but you never seem to take enough interest to talk to me. I understand why though. I’m almost two years older than everyone in this class and I’m a foreigner. Most people in this class haven’t even heard me talk because the teacher never picks on me to answer questions even when I volunteer.

               I remember that when the teacher assigned partners for our project and she said we could pick our own partners you automatically had people looking at you for confirmation to be their partner but I just sat there looking down at my desk because I’d eventually have to do it on my own because I wasn’t picked to be anyone’s partner. You obviously chose, Jongdae to be your partner since he was sitting right next to you and was your friend. I laid my head down waiting for everyone else to settle down and for the project descriptions to be passed out. We had half the period to work on the project but like I had predicted I was by myself but I was fine with it. The teacher left the class and everyone began to talk and forgot all about the project.  She’d given us almost an entire month for the project when I looked at it I saw that it could be done within a week.  That day was the first day you turned around and began talking to me.

“Hey, you wanna pair up with us?”

                I so badly wanted to but I said no. I knew that you only asked me so that you wouldn’t have to do it yourself and would pass all the work to me. You looked at me with distaste afterwards and then went up to someone else that was alone and was smart. They agreed to be in your group and then I heard you explaining to him how you’d pay him to do all the work and just to put their names on the project.  I saw him nod at the amount that you offered. I didn’t feel like looking at you do things like that so I put all of my things away and walked out of class. I went up to the roof top, a bunch of old desks and chairs loitered around but I ignored them and went to sit on the ledge. My feet dangled down and I tilted my head back looking up at the sky. The temperature was still slightly cold but the clouds no longer held dark clouds and the rain had stopped about a week ago.

                I heard footsteps coming up but I didn’t really care. Most of the time it was other students ditching class and sometimes even teachers came up here to smoke. They always told me not to tell I would just nod and turn the other way. I heard my name being called but I didn’t look back. It was your voice I knew it, I could recognize it any day at any time. I heard your footsteps grow closer but then a heard a second pair following behind you. Instead of looking back to you I laid down on the ledge as I continued to look up at the sky. You stopped right next to me and called out my name again. I didn’t move my head I just moved my eyes to look at you. The sun behind you seemed to add an unnatural glow that seems too nice as your backdrop like you deserved to have to sun following you at all times so you’d receive it’s warmth.

“Hey, didn’t you hear me calling you?”

“I did.”

“Well why didn’t you answer me?”

“Because I don’t have to.”

                You looked at me with anger but then Jongdae spoke. His voice pitchy but soothing in a way.

“Why didn’t you want to do the project with us? We were trying to be nice you know. You being a loner and not having any friends.”

“Paying me money to do the project wouldn’t of made you my friends. Besides I don’t want to be friends with you.”

                You two looked at me with anger.  What I said was true though. I didn’t want you to be my friend, I wanted more from you. I wanted to belong to you. I didn’t care much for Jongdae though. You turned and left with Jongdae trailing behind you. Not much later I heard the bell ring and I got up to go to my next class. What I didn’t expect was to find you in the stairwell waiting for me. I walked past you not wanting to talk to you but you grabbed my arm stopping me halfway down.

“Hey, what up?”

“What?”

“I… I know you look at me during class. But today you weren’t. I was expecting you to look towards me to be partners.”

“People usually only look towards their friends for things like that. You’re not my friend, we’ve established that.”

“You could’ve at least tried; I would’ve been your partner if you’d asked.”

“What’s the point I would’ve ended up having to do it on my own anyways?”

“We don’t usually do stuff like that it’s just that neither of us are actually any good at math. That’s why we asked you first. But you said no. So we found someone else.”

“You don’t have to explain to me why you did what you did, again we’re not friends.”

“But we can be.”

“No, we can’t”

“Why not? I don’t see any problem with us being friends.”

“Because I don’t want to be friends with you.”

“Why not?”

“Because I want you to be more than a friend and I know that’s not going to happen so it’s better to not get to comfortable when in the end I’ll just end up hurt.”

                Luhan just walked away as he heard the bell ring signaling that class was starting. He didn’t look back. He just continued to walk into class excusing himself from being late. Chanyeol just looked after him as he walked away. He stayed at the stairwell thinking of what Luhan had meant. Luhan wanted to be more than friends; he didn’t exactly understand what he meant until he was gone. Luhan had a crush on him but he’d never done anything to show it, the only blatant thing that he’d done was look at him from behind in class.  In reality Chanyeol had never even seen Luhan up until the first day of class. He didn’t know that he existed.

                He skipped that class and thought about it. About Luhan. Had Luhan always been there but he just hadn’t noticed or was Luhan completely new. The school was pretty big and new people were constantly coming and going so it wasn’t a big deal when someone new showed up.  He knew the boy wasn’t Korean since his name wasn’t Korean and when he spoke his voice sounded slightly accented. He walked to the library like he did a lot of the time, most of the time it was when his emotions got the best of him and he’d go in there to cry because no one really went to the library throughout the week and the third floor was pretty vacant of people at all times.  He found his own little corner in between the shelves of old yearbooks and old textbooks that were no longer used.  He sat on the floor and looked towards the yearbooks. He took the one from the previous year and began to look through it. He found Luhans picture multiple times throughout, he was part of the soccer team, and was in the national honors society so in all of his pictures he was holding a trophy, a ribbon, or a certificate of some kind.

                He heard some footsteps coming towards him but he didn’t mind them the only people that ever really went up there never bothered him and his friends didn’t know of his spot.  He heard the footsteps stop on the other side of the textbooks shelf. He heard a bag drop to the floor and someone sliding down the wall until he reached a sitting position on the floor. 

“Digging up on me huh?”

                Luhan’s voice was only whisper but it was clear. Chanyeol shut the yearbook quickly before shoving it back onto the shelf.

“No, I always look through the yearbooks.”

“No you don’t. You come here to cry over Baekhyun and then leave.”

“I don’t cry because of Baekhyun. I’m over him. I accepted the fact that he doesn’t like me.”

“Sure.”

“Wait, how do you know that I come here to cry?”

“This isn’t only your hiding spot. But for me I like it here because no matter the weather outside I have a really good view of the sky.”

“What’s up with you and looking at the sky?”

“I saw a movie a couple years back. It was in Japanese and it didn’t have subtitles but both of the characters loved the sky. I don’t know the exact reason because I didn’t understand what they were saying but just watching it you could tell that in a way the sky was their thing, they shared it and it made them happy. After watching the movie the sky seems so different, in a way I’m waiting for someone to appreciate it as much as I do, like in the movie. Except for the ending part, I don’t want either of us to die. Not this young at least.”

“Did you think of me as someone who’d appreciate the sky with you then?”

“No. Because I know you don’t. You don’t care about stupid things like the sky. All you care about is your friends and being with them all the time and having fun. You’re not the type of person to just sit back and soak up the sun; you have to do something under the sun in order for it to be a moment worth remembering.”

                Chanyeol got up from his spot and walked around to find Luhan looking above him through the sky light up into the sky. He sat right in front of him and didn’t say anything he just did the same as Luhan to see if it meant anything. He didn’t see anything aside from the sky, the same boring old sky that had always been there.  His neck started to hurt so he looked at Luhan who was still looking up. His neck exposing itself to Chanyeol, the expanse of pale skin inviting him.  As if by reflex he leaned forward and planted a kiss onto Luhans neck. He felt him tense up but didn’t push him away. So he did it again. This time his lips lingered a little bit longer before he kissed another part of Luhan’s neck.  Luhan looked down from the sky and to Chanyeol’s face. He let out a small sigh and looked down at their position. Luhan leaning against the wall sitting with his legs crossed and Chanyeol hovering over him only a few inches away.

“See, you can’t just appreciate the sky, you have to do something in order for it to be memorable in the slightest.”

“I guess you’re right. “

“I better go.”

“Wait before I get off can I ask you something?”

“What?”

“Why haven’t you ever said anything… about your feelings I mean. Most people confess, and it’s not like you didn’t know I was into guys or not.”

“You still had feelings for Baekhyun. You still do, no matter how much you try and mask them deep down you still hold onto your feelings.”

                Chanyeol looked down with a sad look in his eyes.

“Maybe I do.”

                He then leaned in even more pressing his lips against Luhan’s. He expected to be pushed away but he wasn’t, he just didn’t get any response. When he pulled away he saw that Luhan had his eyes closed. Instead of backing away like he normally would he went back in to take another kiss, this time a little bit more forceful, this time Luhan responded by kissing him back. He felt Luhans arms travel around his neck and pull him closer while tilting his head to the side for better access.  Chanyeol decided to be adventurous and Luhans lips asking for entrance. He didn’t have to wait long before Luhan opened up and let him explore.  When he was running out of breathe he pulled away and just looked at Luhan, his face was flushed and his chest moving up and down rapidly as he tried to catch his breathe.

“I can make room for you, you know.”

“It’s not if you can or not, it’s if you’re willing to or not.”

“Well I don’t know about you but I don’t necessarily kiss people like that if they don’t already have some part of my heart. Do you?”

“No, I don’t. But you already know where you stand with me.”

“Then let’s do this. Let’s give this relationship a go. I still need to know so much about you. Like what’s your favorite color, or your favorite food, or what kind of movies you like and what you like to do in your free time.”

                Luhan just looked at Chanyeol with a smile displayed on his face. With his arms still wrapped around his neck he just pulled Chanyeol close again but right before their lips touched again he spoke.

“We have plenty of time for that later. Right now I just want to feel your lips again.”

“You can have them anytime you want.”

                And they kissed again until they jumped away from each other when they heard Chanyeol’s name being called from right behind them.  When Luhan looked up he saw Jongdae standing at the end of the bookcase with a smirk playing on his lips.

“So this is where you run to every time you disappear. Damn Yeol why didn’t you just tell us that you had a boyfriend. Maybe you didn’t tell us because we’d try and steal him away. “

                Chanyeol looked down in embarrassment as his ears turned pink. He sat back and looked over at Jongdae while grabbing Luhan’s hand and raising it to him.

“Yes, he’s mine. Now you can’t do anything got it. Mine, don’t even try and steal him away.”

“But he’s so cute Yeol, and he’s in soccer, come on you know how I like soccer players.”

“Mine. Find your own soccer player.”

“Fine.”

“I can introduce Minseok to you if you want.”

“Really, oh my god Luhan you’re already becoming my favorite person ever.”

“Yea, I’m sure he’d like to get to know you. Maybe we can do a double date?”

                Luhan looked over at Chanyeol as if needing approval before he saw him nod. He smiled at him and then looked up to Jongdae and smiled at him.

Maybe all of Chanyeol’s unwritten songs could be forgotten and he and Chanyeol could make up their own.  Sure he was two years older than Chanyeol and he was a foreigner but that didn’t really seem to matter. 

this doesn't even reach 3000 words and thats kinda disapointing for me. 

well i hope you liked it.

i've been trying to write happier fics but most of the time they turn out to be really short like this.