Am I dreaming or what?

I've broke up with her a about a month already. But still..I know I can never forget her...ever!

 

Everyday is filled with the hurt that I can't tell...no one...no one can understand me.

 

Everyday is like a dream. Dreaming to be with her again. Dreaming to have her smile for me again. To have her fill my day with her around me...again.

 

No...I know..it won't happen again. 

 

I was deadly in love with her. For me,she's everything. My love for her is overdose. I can't stop loving her. She know very well...how I  do really love her. She knew it. There's no doubt about that.

 

But...I cannot understand. Why? Why she left me? I can't take her reason. She left me for Luhan. I didn't blame him for this because,she who left me and go for him. We both like her. Luhan giving up when we are in a relationship,but now she's running after him.

 

She now couple with him. Leaving me heartbroken.

 

Why is this thing is so hard for me? I wonder..why I have to encounter this hurt?

 

I don't know what have happen to me. Once,I committed suicide. I can't take this hurt. How do I do that? Just by cutting my wrist.

 

I was alone last time at my house. I can't think normally and just do thing mindlessly. Slowly I walk in the bathroom. Standing and staring at my reflection in the mirror.

 

This lonely face. I hate it. Left behind. I keep staring and feeling the hurt overpowering myself, feeling like a dumb controlling my mind. 

 

Automatically without I realize,I smash the mirror with my bare hand. It cracks into pieces. My hand bleed but I sense no hurt...because the hurt she left is stronger. I saw a  small knife on the sink.

 

I reached for it. I sit in front of the tub. I don't know why,I don't know when, I didn't plan this,it just went through the way. I cut my wrist. I don't know what happen next. All things that I know is the surrounding turns quite,blur and my whole body lost It's sense. 

 

I just feel cold,lone,and desperate. But I can feel tears rolling down my cheeks. And then everything slowly turn darker. Soon I'm standing in a dark room without a single light.

 

I can feel the surrounding is warmer. It's quiet but relaxing. It was so comfortable. I don't want to wake up from this relaxing dream but then I try to open my eyes.

 

The light rays hurt my eyes once I open it. I want to cover my eyes with my hand,I raise my left hand. Gosh!!!! It's freaking hurt!!!!

 

Suddenly like just awake from a dream,I feel so tired. My body and head hurt. Really hurt.

 

"Hah?! Min Hyun-ah...you're awake?.... Doctor!!!!",I hear someone calling the doctor. Doctor? For what? Where am I?

 

I still can't digest the situation. I can see a man in white uniform come and checking over me,then he left.

 

"Min Hyun-ah...are you okay? Hurt somewhere?",

 

I look around. I stare at this person and then I discover that it was Minseok. He is sitting beside me. Looks worry.

 

"Where am I?",I asked.

 

"Hospital",

 

"Huh? Hospital? why? For what?",questions from me.

 

"What? You asking me why? Dude,don't you remember,you try suicide...what was on your mind min Hyun?! What were you thinking?! Have you lost your mind?!",Minseok looks mad of me.

 

Now I remember. Suicide? Yes I do. I silent myself. Not saying anything.

 

"Sorry,I shouldn't be mad on you. I know what are you facing now. As a friend I should always stay by your side. I just feel horrible. I kept thinking what if I didn't make it on time? What if I late for another few minutes? I don't know what will happen to you min Hyun. Thank god I went to your house at the right time. And luckily you didn't lock the bathroom door.

 

I know you are down now.  But that's not giving you any reason to do something like this. There's another way to overcome this. I will help you. What the use of having a friend if you keep all this on your own? From now on don't keep this just by yourself okay. You don't need her...we,your friends are here for you.",

 

**********

 

It tough for awhile,but having Minseok,Kyungsoo and Aron around has help me a lot. They done so much thing to bring me get through this,to make her figure out of my mind.

 

And I finally manage to bring back myself and start a new beginning with them...and without her and its even better.

 

There's no longer me who look so down. No longer me who longing for her appearance and no longer me who need her. There just a new me.

 

Everything is just fine. I going through my day like before,chatting,playing and studying. No more loving. 

 

As I've said,everything is fine 

I thought....

But the nightmares comes back.

 

I was sitting with Minseok,Kyungsooand Aron at the library. We were doing some research. I was deeply fall somewhere else when I focus on the book for our research.

 

Suddenly Aron bring some latest news for us...it is even latest for me.

 

"Hey,want to know something hot and spicy?", Aron asks.

 

"What? Tell us.",Kyungsoo responds him. I have no interest. 

 

"You all gonna be surprised by this...I heard that Yu Ra and luhan broke up.",

 

"You kidding me dude?...hah...serve her right!", Minseok get exited. Me? Okay...I'm sorry for her. Their relationship doesn't last so long somehow.

 

"Min Hyun,don't you have any comment about this?",Kyungsoo asks me since I remain silent.

 

"No,I don't have anything to comment about.",

 

"Now I see that cold-hearted Hwang Min Hyun.",Minseok says,patting my back showing his proud on me.

 

Anyway...why did luhan  break up with her. Isn't he like her so much before?

 

**********

I walk by myself to meet those boys at a cafe. It still early,so I don't need to rush. 

 

Walking alone is such a boredom so,I put on headphone and singing along Eyes,Nose,Lips by Tablo and Taeyang.

 

Suddenly,someone blocks my way when I'm not too far from the cafe.

 

It's her.- Han Yu Ra.

 

I ignore her. Trying to move aside but again she blocks me.

 

"What?",I ask looking at her,expressionless.

 

"Min Hyun,I'm sorry for what I have done to you. I was so stupid when I leave you for him. Forgive me...don't leave me..please..let's get back together.",Yu Ra is begging.

 

"Yu Ra,I forgive you,but I don't think that we need to get back together. It is better this way. Let's just go on our own way.",I don't want to be harsh. She is sorry for her mistake,so..that's enough.

 

"But I love you Min Hyun.",

 

"Yu Ra,I think its good enough that I have forgive you. I'm not getting back with you. I like my life now.",

 

"But Min Hyun please....",

 

"Stop it Yu Ra! You getting to much. I said no so it means no! Don't you got me? Urgh!!",I make my way away while she still standing there, begging me.

 

I just ignore her when she shouts..

 

"Min Hyun! I'm not going to loose you!!! Don't you hear me?!", 

 

Whatever..I don't care! I get inside the cafe. They are already there. 

 

"What did she want from you?",Kyungsoo asks. So they saw what have happen.

 

"To get back together..",I tell them. She has spoiled my mood this early morning.

 

"Min Hyun...whatever she said...don't accept her back...no matter what?", Aron suddenly getting serious reminding me.

 

"I'm not going to say yes to her anyway",I replied.

 

"What's wrong with her..she left you and now begging for you back. Who do she think she is?", Minseok says.

 

I laugh.

 

"What so funny huh?",Kyungsoo asks me.

 

"Nothing,just why three of you are taking so serious over this matter? It got nothing to do with you..",

 

"Just that...I think this is not fair",Aron says.

 

"Explanation please...",

 

"Why she keep begging for you when I am here?....don't she alert to my existence?",he says. Yet,for his answers,he got a punch from me.

 

**********

 

Han Yu ra is getting nuisance over me this lately. She keep calling me,sending letters and keep begging. What is wrong with her? She looks different. Something is wrong somewhere.

 

Sometime her drastic attitude changes scared me. Looks like too desperate to have me.

 

Once she text me saying that she don't want to loose me and she will do whatever she can to make sure I will be hers back and not loosing me again. But me also, won't let the same scar to reappear again.

 

I spending my time at school cafeteria alone.

 

I saw luhan. I can see he is making his way towards me. It's alright,we not going to punch each other.

 

He take a seat in front of me. I smiled. 

 

"I hope you are fine with me since what have happen last time..",he says.

 

"Don't worry. It's already past. Nothing to bother about that anymore.",

 

"Good then....",he looks relief. I'm feeling like wonder about something,so I asks him.

 

"Anyway,why did you broke up with her? I thought you like her so much.",

 

"I don't know. It just that...I don't expect her to be like that. She is too controlling me. Everything must go on her way. Nothing I do seems right to her. The longer we were together,the more she's annoying me and the more I'm fade up with her. When situation out of control,we broke up. She blame me.",

 

"Really? She isn't like that before. But now she's keep coming back and begging for me.", luhan laughs for my statement. Yeah it look funny yet weird. 

 

In my conclusion..she left me because she expecting to have more from luhan but her expectations change her and annoyed him. She realize she make a mistake and now coming back and begging for me to have my love back. That's why she looks too   desperate. But I won't care.

 

**********

 

I should be meeting those guys at a restaurant to celebrate Minseok's birthday but in last few minutes I receive a text from unknown number.

 

'Plan change. Go to the cabin at the hill. '

 

Why so sudden? I wonder. But nevermind,he must have reason for this. This unknown number,Minseok must be out of credit.

 

I dressed up in shirt and get ready to the hill. There's a cabin that used for camping and if I still can remember,Yu Ra love that place so much.

 

After 10 minutes I reached there. From far I can see light from the cabin. Minseok's party gonna start soon. I need to be hurry. 

 

I knock the door. No answer. I try to open it,unlock. So I get in but I found no one is there. Where is everyone?

 

"Guys!!!", looks like no one is here. I take a look around the cabin. There is no sign like we will be having a party here.

 

I hear footsteps. I turn back. No one.I continue looking around and again I hear footsteps. I turn back and right on that time someone hit me on head with something hard and I know I immediately faint there-on the spot.

 

I awaken and catch terrible hurt on my head. I try to wake up but I can't. My hand tied up behind. I move my body try to release myself but its useless.

 

Then I hear the footsteps again. Someone is coming towards me. I look around and once I saw who's the person, I lost my words.

 

"Yu...Yu Ra?",

 

"Hi Min Hyun...",

 

"What are you trying to do here? Untied me!",

 

"I'm here trying to make you mine and stop asking to be untied. I told you,I will do whatever to make you mine. Now I will keep you forever with me.",she says.

 

"Where's Minseok?!",

 

"Oh yeah... There is no Minseok here...I'm the one who send you that message. Your friends are waiting for you there...poor them waiting for their friends who will never come. You will be mine...no matter what. Not going to loose you again. Don't ever think to escape yourself sweetheart or else you gonna regret it", she left.

 

She has loose her mind! I need to get out from here. Who thought what she gonna do next. I then hear my phone ringing. It isn't with me. I saw it is put on the small table near the windows. It must be them-calling while waiting for me. I need to ask for their help.

 

I try to move my hand but it give me no result. I look around search for something that can be used to release myself.

 

I see broken glasses on the floor not so far from me.

 

I use my legs to reach the glasses. With a little try I manage to reach for it. I drag it to get near my hands then I use it to cut the rope.

 

My hands is bleeding because of the glass but I put it aside as on this time the most important thing is to release myself.

 

Little by little the rope is cut. A few minutes later ,I'm untied. I look around looking for her figure. Nowhere.

 

It's time!

 

I wake up ,take my phone and slowly make my way to the door. I gonna give Minseok a call when I'm already out from this cabin. Suddenly I hear her footsteps.

 

"I told you,don't try to escape from me,now you have give me no choice",I turn back. There,she's staring at me ,holding a knife.

 

Gosh!! She's totally out of her mind!!

 

Quickly I run out from the cabin as fast as I could. I run away without any direction. Just went through where I think there might be the way out.

 

I run carelessly,I fall on the ground a few times,but but I wake up back and run again. I don't know what the means of tired right now. I need to get away from her anyway.

 

Soon,I think I'm far enough from her.  But I'm in the wood and I don't know where I should go now. I have no direction. Yeah right! Call for help!!!

 

I reach for my phone,argh! The signal is too low here. But still I make my call. I dialed Minseok's number. Waiting...

 

Beep..beep...

"Hello? Min Hyun? Hey,where are you? We are waiting for you here.",

 

"That not important now...Minseok,please help me...let me out of this place!.",

 

"Hey,Min Hyun,where are you? What happen?",

 

"Please,help me...I want to go out from here!!!",

"Okay,okay, first, tell me...where are you now?",

 

"The hill...the cabin area..but now I'm lost....I don't know where I am",

 

"Okay,I'll go now...tell me anything there that can give me some hint",

 

"Here....near here..there is a stream...",

 

"Hey Min Hyun...what happen? I can't hear you...hello? Min Hyun,hello?",

 

"Minseok-ah! Hey...can you......",

 

Beep...beep...beeep....

 

Great! No signal now! What should I do? Where should I go?

 

I walk slowly...suddenly someone calls. I pick it up,exited...because I thought its Minseok and I was wrong...

 

"Hi sweetheart,where are you going?",

 

"What do you want from me Yu Ra?!! Why are you doing this to me?!!",

 

"I told you...I want to make you mine again and I'm not going to loose you ever again.",

 

"Get out of my life Yu Ra!!!",

 

"Where are you going dear? You'll never find the way out from here..it just me who know this place really well...I gonna find you anyway..",

 

Urgh!!!! 

 

I off my phone...and start making my way again...

 

This time...I think I hear her footsteps again..how can she find me?

 

I run. I fall a few times and hit my head on something hard and my head is bleeding. 

 

I hear her footsteps is getting nearer..so I run even faster. I didn't see a small slope in front and again,I fall off the slope. This time I cause my leg twist. I try to stand up. No,I can't...pretty hard with this leg.

 

But still,I force myself to stand up and barely walk away. I walk as fast as I could. I walk while looking at my back...

 

Why I sense like she's near here?

 

I don't know how to describe it when once I face to the front , I feel like something stab me. It's her. Yu Ra stabs me!

 

I can't explain the pain. It was really hurt until I can't feel anything else. I hold her arm tight.My shirt is covered with blood. Why is she dare to do this to me? What did I do wrong?! What?!!

 

"Yu...Ra...wh...why.....?",

 

"You make a mistake and your mistake just one,you make.me.love you and I do this,because I don't want you to leave me.",she whisper to my ear. So slowly,until I can even hear the branches brush against each other.

 

"And sweetheart...I have to do this....so you will never run away from me again. I'm afraid to realize that one day you gonna be with someone else....I can't take that hurt. Sorry sweetheart but you give me no choice. Now,there will be only me know where are you,I'll stay with you here until we meet again in the next life. Goodbye sweetheart,I love you.",she again push the knife,stabbing me even deeper.

 

Someone...please save me...

 

I fall onto the ground. The cold night breeze blew,seems like its trying to help me to endure the pain. I have no more energy to move my body. Suddenly I hear people's voices.

 

 I'm here...please help me...someone please....

 

I feel someone holding me. Smoothly slapping my face while calling my name.

 

"Min Hyun-ah! Wake up! Stay awake.Don't close your eyes!",I know this voice. It's Minseok. He's here. I want to answer him,I wanna say how thankful I am to him for being on the right time. Yu Ra must be caught already. She must have been away from me now. I must be safe from her.

 

"Minseok...Yu...Ra....sh..she....",

 

"Yes I know...you shouldn't speak a lot now..you're injured..I'll go and get some help. Hold on.",

 

**********

 

I'm awake and now I know I am in the hospital after sense the same scene for the second time. I can't move much for my body is seriously hurt everytime I move. 

 

I look around,there I see Minseok, Aron and Kyungsoo standing in front of me. They are smiling so bright. I smiled despite the hurt and tiredness.

 

"You awake finally. It has been about three days since the incident.",Minseok said. He looks relief.

 

"You freaking scared us you know", Aron looks like about to punch me. They said I stay unconscious from the incident for three days. Also with the news that Yu Ra has disappeared for three days too.

 

We talk so long. Anything can be the topics. I'm having fun after a long sleep. They left me alone for awhile to have some lunch and promise to come back.

 

So,I stay alone in the room waiting for them. It has been almost an hour,they should have done their lunch by now.

 

Suddenly the door opened. They are here!

I thought.

I turned,I see the person is coming inside.

 

No! Not again!

 

I stare at her. So she does.

"Yu.....Yu ..Ra?",

 

"Min Hyun...I told you....I'm not going to loose you again. I won't let you go",

 

"NO!!!",

 

                   ~THE END~