Loneliness.

That's what I have been feeling ever since our first concert.

Let me correct that.

Ever since he left us.

It had been very hard for us, even until now. Of course it's fading, 

But the emptiness is still there.

We have been too busy with our concert tour that we cannot catch up to our thoughts.

But every time we formed the tree of life choreo for Wolf, or everytime we sing Baby Don't Cry together as eleven, I can feel the loneliness seeping from the crowd, filling the entire stadium with an undescribable tension.

Some sort of aura that we all try to ignore.

It was just never complete without him here.

I stood up from my bed lazily to drink freshen up.

I need to get rid of this feeling.

I am the happy virus of the team. I am supposed to move on from this.

And heck, the management is doing a half-crappy, half-good job of pushing us to move on.

As I shuffled slowly outside my room, a box from the corner certainly caught my attention.

I rubbed my eyes as I made my way to the box and opened it.

My eyes widened and my breath hitched a little at its contents.

"What..."

Inside the box are clothes, shoes, stuffed toys, and other possessions from our one and only Kris hyung.

Supposedly all of his stuff were either dumped in China or thrown away. But it looks like some were still left here in our dorm.

So... They will also dump these?

No way.

I grabbed a familiar looking red and black checkered jacket, one that hyung comfortably wears when he's not in the mood for swag black fashion.

Pffft.

Kris hyung and his fashion.

Hahaha...

Damn.

I miss him.

I know I'm moving on and all that, but keeping some memories will not hurt, right?

So I grabbed some articles of clothing and stuffed toys and closed the box the way it is when I found it. 

The last thing I want is them finding out my feelings for hyung.

I ran back quietly to my room with my arms full and plopped to my bed.

With some fresh tears b in my eyes.

Damn.

I really can't help it so I laid down and hugged those toys and clothes as if I'm cuddling with him.

Usually, I actually forget these thoughts and be the usual smiley Chanyeol I knew and they have known.

But then, when these rare moments rise up, they really rise up from the dead and choke my feelings to tears.

It's like they suddenly return tenfold.

Damn. I hate reminiscing.

And overthinking.

I don't want to think at all.

Loneliness.

That's what I feel when I stand with them on stage and you're not in your usual spot next to me.

That's what I realize when I suddenly remember a joke with you in it.

I suddenly felt like a tall, lone tower trying to reach for the sky. Trying to hold himself up,

Because his twin tower crashed down.

I suddenly miss you, Kris hyung.

AN: he wore kris' jacket which is kinda big on him and the other one.

Huh so that's why it looks familiar.