“Don't you think you should move on?” My friend looked at me, asking the question she has been tip toing around for the last 2 days, well more like the last year.

“I don’t think, I know I should move in. But it’s hard” My voice was so quiet and it cracked by the end of the sentence, giving away how much I have been crying. A year and 2 days ago, my boyfriend of 2 years died in a car crash, living me alone in a foreign country where we just moved. For a year and 2 days, I have been wearing black. For a year and 2 days I have been miserable, sad and alone.

Sure, I kept on living, if by living you mean eating, drinking, washing myself and going to college. Because that is all I ever did. I just couldn’t live without him. He was my sun, without him I was a cold, barren land.

“Sweetie, I miss you. This, whatever the hell this is” She pointed a finger at me, smiling sadly. “is not healthy. This is not you. I think you should talk about it to someone.”

“I can’t. I can’t talk about it.”

“Why not?” She persisted, her blue eyes scorching me.

“Because if I-I say it…it will mean it is actually real. I can’t!” And then I started crying again. Great. God would think I had no more tears left to cry.

“Madelyn Shaw, so help me God, you will talk about it and you will get better! I won’t sit here and look at you living, no reliving, your past. Because, you have to face it, Aidan is a part of your past now.”

“Lisa…” My voice held a warning note, telling her to back away.

“Don’t you Lisa me. You will do it.” She said, her voice stern.

“Oh really?” I couldn’t help myself, and arched my brow.

“Yes really, and I know just the person.” She replied smugly. My face now contorted in rage.

“If you think I will see a shrink you are out of your mind!” I was aware that a shrink would probably help me, but I was too scared that he or she would tell me that I was completely crazy, so I avoided shrinks like they were the plague.

“I never said I wanted you to see a shrink Maddie. Relax, will you?” She said her voice calm.

“Okay, then who?”

“Let me just call him and then I’ll tell you who.”

She took her phone out, and with her perfectly manicured fingers found the contact in her phone. Pulling her long blond hair onto her other shoulder, she pressed the phone to her ear and waited.

After what seemed like 4 rings, I could hear that somebody with a male voice answered. Since I couldn’t understand a word he was saying I concentrated on listening what Lisa was saying.

“Hey. Yeah, yeah. I know it is early.” It was 11 am, what the hell was she talking about?  “Okay, I have something that might interest you. You know how you told me you wanted to write something with a sad topic, something deep? Well, my friend here has a story that might interest you. I think you should hear her out.” Lisa worked in the music industry, and my toes curled from the horror of the knowledge that she wanted me to tell my story to some guy who probably wrote dumb pop songs! Before I could even start yelling at Lisa, she finished the phone call, smiling smugly.

“Lisa, I swear to God, I am so not talking to some moron.” I said angrily.

“Oh shut up. Would I ever let a moron listen to something that was that important to you? No, I wouldn’t. Trust me…he is something different. He helped me when I was having a rough time, and if he truly writes a song out of your experience, you can bet it, it will be beyond awesome. He says he has a hole in his schedule today, apparently he is having a rest day, so he can talk to you today. I think you should do it Maddie.” She gave me a meaningful look, and I had to grip my coffee mug to stop myself from telling her where I thought she should shove her opinion. Let me give you a clue: up her .

And then I realized something. This was the first time in a year and 2 days that I showed this much emotion about something. I wasn’t mopping around, instead I was angry, which was definitely an improvement.

And as my eyes met Lisa’s, I knew she knew that too.

And that was how I ended up saying yes to meeting the mystery stranger.

4 hours later I was standing in front of one of the most expensive “apartment” buildings in Seoul. I say “apartment” when I truly mean apartments that all looked like penthouses. That was when I knew that Lisa’s friend either had a very rich daddy, or got ridiculous amounts of money for his songs. Either way, I was probably screwed.

Nervously pushing my brown hair back, I stepped into the building. I told the guy at the reception who I was, and before I knew it, I was moving to the highest floor in the building.

I fidgeted some more before the doors opened, unsure of what I should expect.

And then the doors opened. Later on, I wondered if I should have thought that the doors opened to a new chapter of my life and all that mush, but at that moment the only sentence I could formulate in my mind was the doors opened.

No, this was not love on first sight, this was Maddie finally getting her drive back on first sight. When Aiden died, I felt like I couldn’t be a woman anymore, like , kissing, hugging, all of that would be just painful reminders of what I had lost, but standing there looking at him, finally I realized that maybe I could create new memories instead of being reminded of the painful ones all my life.

I blinked, and extended my arm to introduce myself to the beautiful stranger.

“I’m Maddie.”

“Ji.” He said with a small smile, it reaching to his brown eyes that reminded me of my favourite chocolate. His dark brown hair was tucked beneath a black beanie, only a few strands escaping. He wore dark rimmed glasses, and a black T-Shirt.

I could see tattoos on his arms, and I blushed bright red. He was so not my type, but still I felt oddly attracted to him. He also looked very familiar, but I pushed that thought away as I entered the apartment.

I tried not to drool too much over the apartment or over the male who was walking next to me, because, let’s face it, drooling is not very attractive.

“You can sit here.” He said pointing to a brown, very comfy looking couch. “Do you want something to drink?” He asked tentatively, nibbling on his lower lip.

“Water would be nice.” I replied quietly, and padded to the couch.

He returned shortly after, and placed the glass of water on the coffee table in front of me. Plopping on the small sofa closest to the couch, he placed gently a notebook and a pencil in his lap and turned his intention to me. I had a sudden urge to lower my eyes and fidget with the hem of my shirt, his gaze making me nervous.

“Lisa told me that you have a story to tell me. People tell me that I listen well, so why don’t we give it a try Maddie?”

I swallowed and started talking, trying not to chicken out.

“Me and Aiden met when I was 17. He was my first…everything. I fell hard, so hard I was ready to move to the other half of the world just for him. H-he was something different. He was compassionate and funny and intelligent, he had this way about him that made people look at him, listen to him. He was the only person who could make me feel alive, truly alive. So when I finished high school, I moved here with him. My parents were livid, but even they could see that I wouldn’t survive being separated from him.” I stopped talking, trying to make my tears go away.

Without me noticing it, Ji moved from the sofa, and was now sitting next to me on the couch, lightly holding my hand. I raised my eyes to him and sadly smiled.

“2 months after we moved here, and I had already enrolled into college, Aiden…died in a car crash. H-he died.” I gulped, and wiped the tears away.

“I was lost. Suddenly everyday tasks became hard…I felt like my reasons to live were gone. T-the pain was excruciating. It suffocated me. Being without him killed me. I-I, oh God…” I trailed off, now fully sobbing.

Ji embraced me, and let my tears soak his shirt. Here I was telling this story to a complete stranger, crying and destroying his shirt. After what seemed like hours, I finally pulled away and smiled in embarrassment.

“Sorry…I never told this story to anyone before…I never wanted to admit myself that he was truly dead…until now.”

“It’s okay Maddie. Take your time.”

“I guess Lisa decided that I had to talk about it, and apparently she found you were the right person.” I finally said, still blushing in embarrassment that I cried on him.

“That sounds like Lisa.” He said, still looking at me with worry in his eyes.

“How do you know Lisa?” I asked, changing the subject.

 “Me and Lisa met….around 2 years ago? We slept together but instead of leaving the next morning, she asked me if I wanted to write a song with her. And we did, and we have been friends ever since. Who would have thought that a one night stand could actually create a long lasting friendship.” He said grinning, making me relax.

“Maddie…sometimes it is hard to let go, I understand that, but you need to realize that letting go does not mean you are forgetting about Aiden, it just means that you are letting past be past. Ask yourself, what would have Aiden wanted?” Ji said, his tone much more serious now.

I looked away and remembered a conversation I had with Aiden, just a few months before he died. Without consciously doing so, I spoke out loud.

“One night, we were lying in bed, and Aiden told me that I could not be in a relationship with a dead person. Ghosts were to be remembered, and missed, but they could not embrace you or kiss you. He told me that if anything ever happened to him…I had to move on. He said that didn’t mean he wouldn’t make sure my new boyfriend’s car broke down, but… he wanted me to love again, to be happy again. Maybe…maybe it’s time to honor his wish.” I finished quietly, suddenly aware that Ji’s arms were still around me.

“Maybe. Come on, let’s get you something to eat.” Ji said, standing up and pulling me up to my feet.

We ordered in, and spent the rest of the night talking. We didn’t just talk about my past, we talked about our favourite books, films, music…everything.

I told him how my family had 3 dogs, and he told me about Gaho and Jolie, and how much he missed them.

Time flew by. I stood up to help him clean the dishes and realized how dark outside it was.

“Oh God! What times is it?”

Ji chuckled, and pointed at the clock which was right across from me. After I hit his shoulder playfully for teasing me, I realized it was past midnight. How did this happen? Usually days seemed to drag for me, but this one flew by.

“I should go-“ I started saying sadly, but Ji surprised me as he gently took my hand into his, and said:

“No, you should stay here. I have a spare bedroom, come on, it would be stupid for you to go back home now when it’s so dark.” The truth was, I didn’t want to go and we both knew it. So I stayed.

I showered and dressed in one of his shirts. He showed me where the spare bedroom was, and after a few seconds I fell asleep, only for the first time in a year I didn’t have nightmares about Aiden.

I was half awake half asleep, but I was aware enough to know that it was still night and that somebody was in my room. Only the presence didn’t bother me…it soothed me.

Soon enough I heard the sound of somebody writing on a piece of paper and I let that sound lull me back to sleep.

I turned around and groaned at the stream of sunlight entering my room. Lazily stretching my arm to make the annoying alarm on my phone shut up, I sighed. Wow, that was what I called sleep.

After I finally managed to open my eyes properly and turn off the alarm, I quickly dressed into last night’s clothes.

I wasn’t sure what was the appropriate protocol so I exited my bedroom, hoping Ji would be outside. But instead of him I found a piece of paper.

Sorry for leaving like this but I had schedule early in the morning and didn’t want to wake you up. I hope you feel better now. I really enjoyed last night and would like to do it again, of course I you want that too.

Love, J.

I felt my heart flutter in my chest, and closed my eyes, feeling like I finally started breathing again, living again. It was like I could finally see colours around me, actually hear music…enjoy a quiet morning.

I smiled and wrote back.

I would love to do it again :) Just call when you’ll have time.

Love Maddie

I sighed and started searching for my bag so I could finally go back home. Finally I found it on the coffee table, only next to it was a sheet of paper. Ignoring all the warnings in my head about snooping around, I looked at it.

I could read only a few lines before I started crying… but somehow the words on the paper healed my broken heart. They were like a balm that assured that it was okay to be sad, but at the same time told me that it was also okay to live my life.

Lisa was right, his songs were amazing.

And finally, after a year and 3 days, I had something to look forward to in life. Ji.

A/N

So, this is a ty one shot that I wrote because I’m having writer’s block with Soulmates. I hope you like it :) Tell me what you think :D If the writer’s block will keep up, or if you guys want it, I might write another chapter just to show more of Ji and Maddie, and that way I could wrap up everything and turn it into a two shot

Oh and, my friend wrote a small poem that I thought would fit nicely with Maddie and Aidan.

You took your last breath

You closed your eyes

And you were taken by death.

I was left behind

Only with you on my mind.

I just stood still

Hoping it wasn’t real

But then I saw

I was here all alone.