You opened your eyes and tried to slide off the bed as quietly as possible. However, the two arms around your waist tugged you back. Again you attempted to inch away but this time the group was tighter and you sighed softly. Shaking your head on the inside, you turned to your boyfriend, whose eyes were fully closed, but you knew from the curved smile on his face that he was awake to some degree.

But Yongguk in the morning was Yongguk in lazy mode and you knew that he was feeling extra lazy today to include you in his antics. If you really thought about it, it was quite comfortable to be in his arms, lying on the soft mattress, with the fluffy blankets all around you. It was tempting.

            The sun’s rays were peeking through the blinds, with only a few dazzling rays fully making it through. There was a warmth in the room and you suddenly found yourself unable to make through with your plans. You tried, though.

“Gukkie, rise and shine! It’s time to seize the new day of the New Year!”

“Shh,” he said, still not letting you go. “There are other ways to celebrate the first day. Like enjoying the finer things in life, for one. Just close your eyes and go back to sleep with me.”

            You rolled over and stared at him. Even with his eyes closed, Yongguk was the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. His full lips were etched in a gentle smile and you his lashes, giggling a little when he wrinkled his nose. You traced a heart on his cheek and leaned in to kiss it.

            “You’re so energetic,” he complained as he adjusted his arms and this time, reaching one hand up to your hair.

            “Just happy,” you told him and he opened his eyes.

            “Good,” he said simply. “I like it when you’re happy.”

            Yongguk wasn’t a man of many words, but you knew each one he said was meaningful. He had somehow mastered the art of packing a million emotions and one into just one single phrase or word. He didn’t need to say ‘I love you’ for you to know that he did, and that one line he said meant it all.

            “Do you have a New Year’s resolution?”

            He sank his head further into the pillow and looked at you thoughtfully. “One, I think.”

            That was a surprise. Normally, he just set his goals and worked to complete them. “What is it?”

            The hand that had been in your hair moved to your face and he ran his knuckle down your jaw, not saying anything. “I’m not sure how to phrase it,” he confessed.

            The sun beamed on top of you and the shadows etched themselves on Yongguk’s face so that his eyes were unreadable for a moment. There was a calm but also an injected anticipation. “Well, there are three actually,” he amended.

            You waited patiently. “The first is to stay true to who I am, and to keep growing. I think that’s the selfish one. The second is to do more things for other people.”

            “And the third?” you prompted him.

            Yongguk didn’t say anything but tangle your legs together and stare at you. “We should get up soon,” completely avoiding the topic.

            You pouted. “Hey, no fair. You need to tell me!”

            He gave a shy cough and looked at the ceiling. You placed two hands on his face and tilted it so that he was looking you in the eyes. “Does it have something to do with yours truly?” you .

            “Perhaps,” he said softly. There was something new to his voice now and you bit your lip, watching him.

            “Can I know?” You didn’t want to push him anymore. You just wanted him to tell you when he was ready.

            “Yes. But I want to say it in a meaningful way.”

            “You don’t have to. I’ll know it.”

            Yongguk bit his lip and opened his mouth before closing it again. “Hmm,” he thought. “The third resolution is to always do my best to keep this smile on your face, to have these moments where nothing matters but just you, and to not mess anything up.”

            It was beautifully worded because for once, it wasn’t veiled underneath simple statements. You never wanted or needed a declaration from him but this was definitely a nice change. It was a confirmation of things you always knew, and sometimes, this was the most appreciated.

            “I hardly think you can mess up,” you told him.

            His eyebrows furrowed and he looked at you seriously. “I don’t think I’m that good. I sort of am that silent, brooding man. I don’t quite know how you stand it sometimes.”

            “My turn for my resolutions.”

            Yongguk looked at you expectantly, and confusedly. Not only had you ignored what you said, but you were moving onto a new topic. “One, always let you know how perfect you are to me. Because like the cliché goes, perfect imperfections are what is most beautiful. Two, I want to grow with you, to experience more things together. And lastly, I want to be able to reach the goals I set the way you do.”

            He laughed and hugged you tighter. “The way you say it, you’d think I was some exalted being or something.”

            “You’re not, but you’re still perfect.”

            He hummed in satisfaction and there was a pause before he planted a kiss firmly on your head. “I love you.”

            You smiled against his shirt. “Fourth resolution,” Yongguk continued. “To say that to you more often because I really, really do.”

Happy New Year!

I hope everyone in the new year can find something to improve on, find more reasons to smile, and continue learning and prospering. I'm privileged to be able to go with you all into a new year.

this is for aidhwang