It’s the middle of the night when Donghae jolts awake, flailing wildly. A yell tears from his throat as he chokes for breath. It takes him a few seconds of absolute panic for him to realize he isn’t in the pool anymore; he’s in his own bed and he’s totally able to breathe.

 He shudders as he remembers his dream: back in the pool, with that damn fish tank over his head. Struggling to breathe as he slowly runs out of oxygen, his head feeling light and full of cotton; and then desperately trying to push his way to the surface as the others just push him back down. He knows that in reality, they hadn’t done it on purpose, but in his dream they had been laughing as they pushed him back under, laughing as they watched him suffocate. Donghae starts to shiver violently at the memory, and he curls himself into a ball, his hands in his hair, breath coming in uneven pants.

Calm down, calm down, it’s not real, calm down, he’s chanting desperately to himself in his head, but it’s not working, and he can feel the shivers growing more violent, and tears starting to prickle at the corner of his eyes. He’s helpless to stop himself, as he works up into more of a panic. The tears start to fall then, rolling down his face to drip to his pillow, but he hardly notices, too busy fighting his body for control of his emotions. He can’t help the soft sob that falls from his lips.

“Donghae?” a sleepy, but concerned voice comes from the other side of the bedroom, and Donghae whimpers at the voice, trying desperately to curl himself tighter.

There’s a rustle of movement, as Leeteuk gingerly rolls out of bed and walks over to his side of the room.

“Donghae?” Leeteuk is closer now. Donghae tries to make himself as small as possible in his bed.

“Hae,” Leeteuk speaks to him softly and slowly, “Hae, what’s wrong?”

Donghae can’t answer; the only thing coming from his mouth is broken sobs. Leeteuk hovers anxiously, unsure of what to do, as he kneels beside the bed and stares at his terrified dongsaeng. He slowly reaches out a hand to rest it on Donghae’s exposed shoulder. Donghae yelps and flinches at the contact, scaring both of them. But Leeteuk doesn’t withdraw his hand; he leaves it there, the weight and warmth of his palm making Donghae panic more.

“Hae, it’s just me, it’s your Teukkie,” Leeteuk’s voice is slow and reassuring, “Can you tell me what’s wrong?” Donghae shakes his head violently, still squirming away from the contact.

“Okay, that’s okay,” Leeteuk tells him, finally withdrawing his hand, and Donghae would cry in relief except that he’s already crying.

“I’m gonna go grab somebody, hold on,” Leeteuk tells him. Donghae only partially hears him, but he doesn’t even feel the tiniest bit calmer as Leeteuk backs away from him and leaves the room. He doesn’t want to be alone with himself. Why is Leeteuk leaving him?

Donghae doesn’t know how long he’s lying there, heart racing, whole body shaking, and totally unable to stop crying. It feels like an eternity before he hears the door creak open again.

“Hae?” this time it’s Eunhyuk’s sleepy voice. Donghae feels something inside his chest loosen at the familiar voice.

Eunhyuk crosses to his side quickly, sitting down quietly beside him.

“Hae, are you okay?” Eunhyuk asks him gently, and Donghae shakes his head in response, a fresh wave of tears spilling over. Eunhyuk hushes him, reaching out to brush his sweaty hair off his forehead.

Somehow, the contact this time isn’t as bad; or maybe it’s just because it’s Eunhyuk, who Donghae would literally trust with his life, that’s making all the difference. Donghae doesn’t care either way, as Eunhyuk continues to pet his hair soothingly. Eunhyuk’s fingers feel amazing carding through Donghae’s sweaty locks, and he feels the tears and the tremors slowly start to recede as Eunhyuk sits with him.

“You’re doing so well, Hae. I’m really proud of you. You can get through this,” Eunhyuk continues to talk to him, a steady stream of comfort.

It feels like it takes forever, but Donghae’s breathing and heartbeat gradually slow, almost returning to normal levels. He gingerly starts to unroll himself, one inch at a time, as Eunhyuk reassures him that he’s safe and doing so well. Eunhyuk never stops his hair.

Finally, Donghae feels most of his panic slip away, and he relaxes, boneless on his mattress, eyes closed in exhaustion. He feels wrung-out and battered. He reaches up a shaky hand to tangle his fingers with the hand that Eunhyuk has in his hair.

“You with me now, Hae?” Eunhyuk asks him. Donghae nods slowly, still not opening his eyes, and Eunhyuk leans over to brush a soft kiss against his forehead.

Donghae’s eyes flutter open at the contact, and he sees Eunhyuk’s concerned face swimming before his eyes. The tears start to well up again. He rolls onto his stomach, his arms reaching out to drag Eunhyuk closer to him, and buries his head in one of Eunhyuk’s thighs.

The tears soak into the soft material of Eunhyuk’s pajama pants, and Eunhyuk runs a soothing hand up and down his back as Donghae cries himself out.

When the tears finally stop, Donghae feels a little more in control of himself. He raises his head, locking eyes with Eunhyuk, and Eunhyuk gently ruffles his hair before he repositions both of them on the bed properly. He slides down to line himself up with Donghae, wrapping an arm around Donghae’s shoulders and drawing him against his torso.

Donghae rests his head on Eunhyuk’s chest, tangling their legs together. Eunhyuk is humming something slow and sweet, the sound moving in vibrations through his chest, and Donghae soon finds himself slipping back into an exhausted, dreamless sleep, lulled by Eunhyuk’s strong heartbeat.