My first time going back to LA in almost four years was not a reason I ever expected to go back to. Not once in my life and it is still hard to grasp the reality of it all. I was not expecting to burry my best friend six feet undergroud.  I was not expecting to see her in a casket, pale and beautifully surrounded by wildflowers, her favourite. I wasn't expecting for her to be ripped out of my life suddenly. I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't this.