Title : (7/10)

Well the 7 points was basically how well the title fitted the story,for appeal,I give 0 out of 3 because out of all the titles,when I see this one,I would simply skip it. It doesn't really capture my attention.

Description&Foreword : (8/10)

Well the description is perfect,but you can move part of it in your foreword. Like the sentence "The reason why I haven't died yet,is because I want to know who would actually love me." to the foreword just above your trailer,that would be nice. So instead of writing the author's note and credits,try to put a little segment of your story in it too.

Grammar&Language : (12/20)

There are quite a number of mistakes,and they even begin at your description,since this is for a competition,i'll correct your description and some of the mistakes in the chapters. "Everyone's surprised i'm not broken yet." As you can see,I changed 'haven't' to 'I'm not',reason being,in this situation where you use the word 'broken',it's not in a literal form,you're not really breaking yourself,but it's the word where you use to describe your miserable life and somehow giving up on it. So when you use the term 'Haven't',you change the meaning of the sentence to a literal form.

"But we all know they just say it just to receive compliments from others. They don't know that I am a true forever alone girl." First things first,the 'just' in the near beginning is unnecessary. In the 2nd sentence,I changed 'the' to 'a'. Because if you use 'the' it makes it look as if the term 'forever alone girl' is a person(the only person in the whole world) and that is Navita. No. Navita is not the only 'forever alone girl' in the whole world,so you should use the word 'a' instead of 'the'.

In the first chapter,3rd line, "You should ignore those mean words because they are of no importance to you." I changed 'should be' to 'are' because mean words are of no importance,they're not should be,because they originally are. Mean words can hurt you,yes,but they are also not important. But I have one question,why is the beginning part in 1 font and then the rest is in a different font? Sorry,LOL.

Second chapter,1st line, "I heard the terrible sound of my alarm clock,waking me up with a loud groan/making me wake up with a loud groan. Why do alarm clocks have to have such an ear-deafening sound?" There was quite a number of mistakes in your first line. If the judge is a petty reader,I'm sure she would be able to spot all these mistakes in one glance. The reason why I cancelled 'with a loud groan' is because if you write it that way,its the alarm clock waking you up with it's loud groan,not your loud groan,so it definitely looks wrong,but if you still want the 'with a loud groan' then you can choose the second option which sounds more right.

I don't know how but writing 'did' instead of 'do' sounds wrong,mainly because it's not a verb. I also changeed 'a' to 'and'. These mistakes aren't that bad like bad grammar,tense or spelling,but it's not a small mistake either...so I guess it's somewhere in the middle. I'm not going to spot out the mistakes in the 3rd chapter,but besides these mistakes that I pointed out,there are more,so do use the initiative to proofread your story.

Character : (20/20)

You explained the characters perfectly,you elaborated Navita's traits and Kai's traits very well,describing how broken she was to have been outcasted and bullied plenty of times. These are hard to write unless you've experienced it yourself. So since it's a perfect score,I have nothing else to say here,good job!

Flow of story : (5/10)

Everything was going very well paced until the last part...it totally 'turned me off'. They just met not long ago,yes it's possible to have love at first sight,I've experienced it before,yes,but...they're taking it a little too fast no? Yes they are in love with each other but I felt that the kiss was a little rush. In situations like these,hugs are much more better than kisses. Because the fact that they have just met not that long ago and are already having lip to lip contact is abit...disgusting,no offence. But yeah,I advice you use hugs instead of kisses if you want to write a situation like that next time.

Originality&Storyline : (10/10)

Perfect! It's not that I haven't seen a plot like this before,but they way you wrote it was one of a kind,and I can tell,this was written from experience...no? Well only real professioners or people who experienced it before could write it this way. Want to know why I think of it this way? It was because I've experienced it before and what I felt in the past was exactly what you wrote. Other authors would find it hard to express the OC's feelings because they lack of experience. But my experience wasn't as bad though,I had a few friends,haha,but still outcasted. I really understand Navita's situation and the whole plot,it was well written. Good job!

Overall : (62/80)

My overall enjoyment was okay...one reason is because I don't really like EXO. But I really like the storyline and it was written very well. You just have to take more note and practice more on your grammar because practice makes perfect right? It wasn't really bad though,so it's quite okay. For the competition,I hope you win! Remember to credit the shop in your foreword so that I can cancel your name off the list,once again,thank you for requesting at KMS & HMH Review Shop! Have a nice day.