My 12 BodyGuards

Description

there will a girl who ran away from there home. Then she said that she will never came back to their home, her parents is so worried to her, until her parents hire 12 handsome secret bodyguards of their daughter. The parents said to the 12 boys, the first handsome boy who court their daughter is the lucky one. So they are trying to catch the attention of that girl, who would you think will she choose in 12 handsome boys?

 

Foreword

this is my 2nd fanfic story, so please enjoy reading this, thank you again for supporting my 1st fanfic story. If you dont read yet, if you like read it.

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Comments

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Tinkle_Star #1
Chapter 2: I'm not trying to be rude, but I think you should try to work on your grammar.
Additionally, it does not make sense for the "12 bodyguards" to say "araso" to the mother as it is a little too informal. They should say "araso yo" (알았어요). But even that is a little too informal. It would make more sense for them to say "네"
Better yet, in my opinion I don't think you should use Korean words at all. It really confuses some people who don't understand it.
But it's your story, so do whatever you want.
I just wanted to give some suggestions.

I'm sorry if I sounded a bit too stern or mean. I'm not bashing at all, but I just wanted to give you some advice for your 2nd story.
cinemon #2
Chapter 1: This sounds interesting...
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