The soft autumn breeze wafted the far away scents close. The minimal trees in my neighborhood strayed from their average green for more earthy tones of yellow, orange, red, purple, and even brown. The soft crunches of the fallen leaves accompanied me on my walk home from a long day at school. After hours of studying and learning, the quiet walk home was like curling up to a nice cup of tea and a book on a cold winter day.

    My feet unconsciously carried me to the quiet park a couple blocks away from home. This is the one thing that doesn’t change, no matter how many times I move, no matter how many neighborhoods I visit, the parks are always the same. A swing set swaying all in its lonesome. Slides and benches sit solitarily begging for attention. These unoccupied parks became my safe haven after a day at school. These few minutes away from people was what I craved for.

    With a sigh I swung my backpack off my shoulders and onto the worn bench. I strolled my way over to the swaying swing. It creaked under my weight, screaming in protest. I didn’t listen. I lifted my legs up and let myself be carried away by the wind. My eyes closed, involuntarily.  I got lost in myself, in my world, in my head where anything could happen.

--

    “Bye, I’ll text you ok?” Her angelic voice whispered in my ear. Goodbyes were always hard, especially when we only get to see each other once in a blue moon. I nodded into her hair, smelling her shampoo one last time, trying to imprint it into my memory. My muscular arms were wrapped around her slender waist. Her thin arms threatened to release me from her embrace, and I strengthened my hold on her. I didn’t want to let go. I didn’t want to go back to my busy, restless schedule. I didn’t want to get caught up in fanservice.

    “I should go,” she murmured, “They’ll find us, and we don’t want a scandal, now do we?”

    I hummed in agreement into her perfectly colored hair. I wanted so badly to escape. I wanted to grab her by the arm and take her by her freshly manicured hand and run away. I reluctantly released her from my hold. The gap between our bodies grew as she took a step back. Almost instantly I felt her loss like the feeling followed by eating your chocolate cake too quickly, then realizing there was no more left.

    Before I knew what happened, her face was buried in my chest. Her breathing heavy and her body shaking. Her gentle hands clung to my grey polo as if it was the only thing in the world.

    “Whats wrong?” I asked taking her hands and covering them with mine.

    “They’re here Ilhoon, they’ll find out!” Her voice was filled with panic.

Acidic worry clawed my stomach. Before a rash decision could form in either of our brains, my body reacted. Within seconds the two of us ran out the back door of the discrete indie coffee shop.

"Go," I whispered nudging her down one side of the ally.

"But they'll-"

"Its okay. Just listen to me." I cut her off before running in the opposite direction. Although my feelings for her were growing as time passed, our careers were still more important, and we both realized that.

My lungs burned as I pushed myself harder, sprinting down the dark alleyway. Every push and pull of my muscles, every burning breath I took in, screamed for me to stop. The dim streetlights couldn’t reach behind the buildings where I was. I blindly stumble past the array of dumpsters and storage boxes. My knees were sore from the constant collisions with the small objects, but I pushed on trying to get out of this predicament.

My pursuer's steady footsteps began to falter as the chase continued, but I couldn’t move any faster. My muscles ached, my lungs were unable to keep up with my oxygenationary needs. My head hurt from the lack of air. My vision started to blacken at the edges, but I saw my salvation just in time.

A bear costume used for advertisement purposes sat next to an open door. The light from behind the gateway illuminated the costumes opaque fuzzy texture. Without a conscious thought I had the bear head on. I grabbed the rest of the fuzzy fabric and rushed through the open door. Slipping into the rest of the disguise, I casually walked out the way I came in. Greeted with a familiar darkness of the back alleyway, I followed the concaves of brick wall and made it to the front of the little shop.

    Thankfully the paparazzi was nowhere to be found. Relief embraced my anxiety abused insides as I picked my way through the crowd of night goers and college students out for a late night snack. I let my legs carry me away from the long gone danger.

--

My feet picked at the woodchips on the concrete beneath the park bench I was currently resting on. The school skirt did little to protect me from the chilling winds of the crisp autumn night.  A shiver ran down my spine as if the night was trying to make me acknowledge it’s existence, like a stubborn child. My arms wrapped around my sturdy frame trying to retain as much heat as possible.

I sighed reluctantly, trying to convince myself to go home. My mind continued to make up excuses regarding the time or the weather, but I wouldn’t listen. I would much rather stay planted on the park bench than to go home to the unexpected. I was pestering myself when I saw a figure slowly approach my park. Funny how I call it my park, as if it was mine, and only mine. I watched as the figure’s details became clear under the yellow street lamp. It was the man in the bear costume from the electronics store. Or, I assumed it was him.

It finally ceased movement when he found the spot next to me on the rickety old park bench. My eyes never left the figure following its every movement. For all I know it could be a e. He let out a sigh. It was evident he had a manly voice, but wasn’t done growing. His voice belonged to someone in their late teens, or early twenties.

I cleared my throat forcing him to acknowledge my existence. The bear head turned towards me. He knew I was here.

“Tough day at work today?” I asked hoping he would just talk his way to a goodbye. Regret instantly engulfed my insides as the silence left my question unanswered. A mere nod crushed my high hopes.

--

“Tough day at work today?” Her voice filled the harsh silence. I continue to looking into her deep eyes, completely mesmerized. Her arms hugged her waist tightly as if trying to protect herself from the cold billowing winds of the autumn night. I couldn’t tear my eyes from her’s. I should’ve felt scared, or even panic. She could be a fan, or even worse, a anti. She could be anyone. Instead the sweet creme of surprise layered my insides. Nobody ever asked me that before. Granted, she doesn’t know my job, or anything about me, but it felt so nice. Finally, her question registered in my mind. I nodded, embarrassed for taking so long to answer such a mundane question.

Her gaze averted from me to her lap. Her pleated skirt rested just above her knees. Something beneath the ruffled fabric grabbed my attention. A large blue-black spot on her thigh peaked out as her skirt lifted with the wind. Her trembling hand brought the fabric to its proper spot. I averted my eyes, not wanting her to know I saw, and knew what it was.

“How about you?” I asked, before I realized what I was doing. What was I thinking? My voice could’ve given away my identity! My heart sped up, my stomach churned, threatening to upchuck the minimal food I ingested earlier today. Every second of silence felt like an eternity, as I waited with baited breath. My muscles tense, ready to run if needed.

“I don’t work.” She responded quietly, relaxing my sore body. I look at the harsh shadows casted upon her face by the street lights. Her eyes remained fixed in her lap, her lips slightly agape, letting out little puffs of fog with every exhale. “Is it hard to dance around all the time?” She asked. For a moment my heart stopped. Did she figure me out? Did she know who I was? “Is it hard to hand out flyers everyday, even when its warm outside?”

I managed to release the breath I didn’t know I was holding and nodded. “ It’s tough. Even though the pay isn’t very good, I still get to do what I love. To entertain people. I get to dance everyday. Even when it gets hard, I feel so much better seeing all of the people that smiled because of me.” I answered truthfully, until I realized I was talking about my real job. The one I had train so many years for. The one I sacrificed my childhood for. There was something about the way she looked at me, like she was listening to every word I said that made me want to continue. It was her understanding gaze that made me want to spill all of my doubts. There was an invisible force, like the smell that lingered long after fresh cookies are baked a devoured, that made me continue. “Sometimes I worry, that one day I will blend into the crowd, that I won’t be worth anything anymore, so the boss will just fire me. Terminate my contract, and get rid of me like I was yesterday’s leftovers. I don’t want that to ever happen.”

Every word that spilled out of my mouth she caught with her never wavering gaze, she unknowingly held with me. She soaked up all of my worries, and complaints like a dry piece bread in a hot bowl of soup. Her attention didn’t falter until long after I was finished speaking.

“I should probably go, I have to work early tomorrow.” I whisper into the music of the late night critters. This wasn’t exactly false, we had an interview early tomorrow morning, but she didn’t need to know. Slowly, she nodded and looked to the ground, where her khaki backpack sat on top of a mound of red woodchips, like a ruler. “Bye.” I whispered as I stood up, trying to remember my way to the dorm. It felt so refreshing to let go of all the thoughts that were buzzing inside my head like millions of bees. It was a cup of crisp, sweet lemonade on a warm summer day. That was exactly what she was. She was the one that let me cool off after long stressful hours of putting up a facade. With a deep breath, I removed the mascot head, and dug around my pockets for my phone.

--

            “Bye,” I whispered the man in the bear costume. He seemed so lonely, and unsure of himself, yet confident. He had this kind of aura that girls would flock to, or maybe it was just the way he speaks or the way he had with words that captivated her attention. Or perhaps it was his selflessness. Despite having such an undesirable job he still managed to think of others.

            Reluctantly, I grabbed my backpack by the leather handle, heaving it off it’s throne of red wood. With remains of it’s seat still clinging to the bottom, I slung it over my shoulder, and started on my way home. On my way to the unknown black hole of chance and luck.

Hi! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter, and it wasn't too boring for you! If it was, please let me know, so I can work on that in the next chapters! Thank you so much for actually reading this! I hope you enjoyed it! If you are interested in this story, then please subscribe :P

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