I had it all planned out. I was going to be assertive, straight to the point with no nonsense. He was going to know exactly how I felt no if, ands or buts about it. The second I laid eyes on him all my practice and mental preparation flew out the window. 

On my way into work, I ran into Doojoon who, after I got over my shock of him being back a day early, informed me that Kikwang was in dance room B. I thought I would be mentally prepared to go down there and after a short pep talk to myself in front of the door; I was ready. Total lies. The second I opened the door and saw Kikwang practicing his part for their latest song I was not sure what came over me. I stood there awkwardly for a moment my heart pounding and my stomach twisting into knots and before I suddenly bolted. My mind screamed for me to stop but my legs refused.

After running up three flights of stairs, I stopped and leaned against the wall facing the door to the hallway and sighed heavily. “Well that went well.” Unbelievable, he did not even have to look in my direction and I turned into a mess. My cheeks burned with embarrassment as I slumped against the wall and hoped that no one would come into the stair well for a while.  “I should just march right in there and tell him even if he came to his senses and changed his mind. Skyler did not drag me all over the place and yell at me for nothing this weekend.”  

Maybe I just needed to go somewhere I knew I would not be able to run away. Checking the time, it was only a little after nine A.M. so it was not possible to use lunch break as an excuse to go somewhere and talk with him. Okay, just work until lunchtime then ask him if he is busy and if he is then ask him when he is available. Sure, that will work it is not as if he will not answer a call or text.

Sighing heavily, I walked towards the recording room that had become my office. Gina still needed one more song for her album even though we had managed to get a lot of work done over the weekend. Maybe a nice ballad would work. I could plan for an orchestra accompaniment or maybe just a piano accompaniment? Fans always loved when singers sang with just the piano backing. Yeah a piano would be good and she has a strong and smooth enough voice for it. 

I looked around the booth and smiled in satisfaction, the cleaning staff had not touched a thing. They left my chair exactly where I had it along with the settings on the sound and effects boards. I pulled out a few folders from my case and flipped through a couple of lyrics in the first one. When I found nothing of use, I flipped through the second and then the third. “Well we’re starting from scratch then I guess.” Pulling out a pen and a new sheet of paper, I started to plan the new song.

What felt like a few minutes later, someone opened the door. Not even bothering to look up I continued to scribble on the paper going over the lyrics once more. “I’m working on a piano ballad for Gina does that sound alright?” I questioned the person, assuming that it was Kyoung.

“Sure,” I froze instantly at that voice, “but I think a late lunch would sound even better.”

I was in disbelief for a moment until I looked up to find Kikwang standing there with a soft smile on his face and his hands behind his back. He looked tired, but happy, and my stomach flipped nervously when his smile widened and he shifted side to side. “What are you-?”

“Well Doojoon-hyung said he saw you this morning and when I couldn’t find you so I thought you might be here and probably hungry so,” he moved his hands form behind his back revealing a pizza box, “I brought lunch. You did at least eat breakfast right or do I need to be mad and yell at you for skipping nearly two meals?”

Was it really lunchtime already? Glancing at the clock on my computer, I wanted to shoot myself; it was nearly 2:30. How in the world did I miss all that time? “Oh um breakfast yeah…I had um breakfast.” I had um breakfast. Really? Well, there goes all the eloquence I thought I could have. Grumbling a little to myself, I reached over and pulled the chair in the corner next to me. “Don’t just stand there have a seat you’ve got to be tired.” I did not meet his eyes as I patted the seat I pulled over. 

“I can’t tell if you’re lying or if you’re just tired you’re acting so weird.”  I nearly choked on air. How was I the one acting weird? He is the one acting like nothing is going on and that I just want pizza and to talk.  That pizza does smell good now that I am thinking about it. “Hey, stop working and eat missy.” I had not expected him to grab my wrists and drag my hands away from the computer, forcing me to look at him. 

“I just need to finish this one-”

“No you need to eat otherwise you’ll pass out and then I’ll be worried forever and probably never ever leave you alone and the pizza is getting cold so eat you.” I did not think that it would be appropriate to tell him that I did not want him to leave me alone. Especially when it seemed like he would not be bringing up this past weekend any time soon.

Sighing heavily I opened the pizza box, “Alright, alright I’ll eat.” For a second I was surprised he remembered that I only like sausage on my pizza but I suppose I should not be. He always remembered the smallest things. He watched intently as I took my first few bites until a blush came to my face and I nudged him with my elbow. “You yell at me to eat now you better eat too.” 

He the smile on his face was almost secretive as he took a slice of pizza and lightly tapped it with mine as if to say cheers. How can he be so calm? On the other hand, was he really just fine with everything? I am going to destroy Skyler in the most brutal way possible. 

Two pieces of pizza and some light chatting later I was determined to buy every medieval torture device I could and use them on Skyler. Kikwang was just so happy and did not even mention that I was wearing the charm bracelet he gave me. Not to mention every time I asked him about the trip his answers were vague but polite. 

Two and a half pieces later, I could not take it anymore. I dropped the rest of my pizza and stood up, my hands on my waist. He looked at me confused and yet for some reason he did not look that surprised but I could not stop the oncoming rant. “How can you just sit there like nothing is going on? I was going crazy all weekend trying to figure out how I was going to talk to you about everything and you’re sitting here eating pizza like it is some lazy Sunday!”

He almost looked amused when the corner of his lip turned up slightly for a few seconds.  “Tell me what I’m supposed to do then.”

No, do not say my name like that it makes it nearly impossible to be angry with you. “I want you to tell me that you haven’t come to your senses. That you still want to be with me or that you even wanted to in the first place. I want you to tell me it is actually possible to have a relationship with a person like me! Instead you’re having a high old time eating pizza and now I’m going to have to kill Skyler when I get home because he made me believe that you wouldn’t come to your senses.” Kikwang did not say a word. He just stared up at me with an emotion I could not quite place.  “Actually now that I think about it I’m going to go torture him now, bye.  The pizza is yours.” I turned to walk away only to forget the door was the other way around Kikwang and I walked into the desk. Well, more like slammed my knee into the desk. I heard him stand up and I held out my hand, “Nope I’m fine, my ego is a little bruised from a failed angry walk away, but I’m fine.” 

If I were not so embarrassed, I would have yelled at him when he slowly moved my hand down and laced his fingers with mine. I was certain he could tell how sweaty my palms were from nervousness but he made no move to remove his hand and I could not find the will to pull away. Somehow, I could tell he was smiling as he pulled me back and wrapped his arm around my waist. “Your ranting is really cute you know that?” I wanted to say something but my throat had closed up and I could barely breathe. “But what makes you think I’d have to be out of my mind to want to be with you? Crazy girl.” He rested his cheek against my head and sighed softly. “You know I saw you this morning.” I was barely able to squeak out a what and he nodded. “Yeah so I figured that when you were ready to talk about that and I admit I was nervous.”  He paused for a second and laughed lightly at the question I had not asked, “Because I thought I had been too forward. Now if I let you go you won’t try to run away will you?”

“I promise.” Oh, look I can talk again. Slowly he let me go and I turned around though I was not able to meet his eyes. I was not sure where to look so I settled for his shoes until he grabbed my chin and forced me to look up. Okay embarrassment level increased ten times, I am sure my face is on fire and you sir need to stop being so attractive.

“You said that you didn’t think I would want to be with you. I think the better question is if you’re willing to be with someone like me. I can’t exactly take you out in public all the time, and wear cute couple things, and I’ll have to lie for who knows how long that I don’t have a girlfriend. Would you really be alright with that?”

Before I could answer, the door opened and we both jumped away from each other in surprise. “Hey so um Kyoung was looking for you he-” I would recognize that voice anywhere. Turning I found Skyler looking between the two of us half in shock and half pleased. “Okay I ruined the moment sorry,” he then looked over at me and switched to English, “girl if you come out of this room still single I’m kicking your .” 

This fool really wanted to be beaten. I am still using torture devices on you when I get home I promise you that. “You know I’ve been teaching him English right?”

“I know.” Practically cackling he waved a little to Kikwang and darted out of the room. 

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I turned back to Kikwang more embarrassed than ever. “Did you understand that?” When he looked at me blankly, I breathed a sigh of relief and leaned against the desk.  “Okay good.” 

He smiled a little and hesitantly stepped closer and I felt my stomach flip again. “So you never answered my question.”

Well, no turning back now. Besides, I wanted to be with him and not letting anyone know for a while was perfectly fine by me. At least for now. Okay just remember what Skyler said do not worry about the future to much it will happen how it’s supposed to. “Well I-” Before I could finish his voice started ringing.  Seriously? Smiling sheepishly, he looked at the number his eyes widened in panic for a second before he ignored the call. I waited a few seconds for him to give me the go ahead before I tried again. Only to have the phone ring again. “Ah seriously I can take a hint!” I looked up to the ceiling grumbling in English. 

Kikwang answered this time and spoke briefly to the other on the line who I assumed to be one of the older members or his manager when he said hyung but I was too annoyed to pay much attention. When he hung up, he moved closer and tried to move around until I was looking directly at him but I kept moving my head around, almost smiling. “I’m still taking that as a yes.”

“What you-? Wait a minute you understood that!” That big fat liar! I wanted to hit him or at least throw something at him. 

Kikwang just smiled as if it was no big deal and he looked so proud of himself. I wasn’t sure, if this made me want to hit him more or if I wanted to hug him. “I’ve been practicing.”

“So you understood that-”

He shook his head and shifted closer. “All I know is Skyler wants to kick your for some reason. I’m guessing it’s something embarrassing?” 

My face flushed again and I weakly pushed him back. “You don’t need to know.”

He paid no attention to my attempt to get him to move away and actually moved closer tugging on my shirt a little bit. “So?” His tone was hopeful, almost childlike, and once again, I had an overwhelming urge to hug him. 

I knew what he wanted but I feigned ignorance and raised an eyebrow, “So?”

And there was the pout I was expecting. Darn you Lee Kikwang you know how to get to me way too easily. “Am I allowed to take that as a yes?”

Still blushing I smiled a little, “Didn’t you already decide it was?” Before I was even able to finish the sentence, he pulled me into a tight hug. Wiggling my arms out from between us, I wrapped them tightly around his waist and rested my cheek against his chest. The moment didn’t last too long when his phone rang again. I had a feeling that would happen a lot so I probably should get used to it. “You have to go don’t you?” I made no move to let him go. 

“Yeah, but now that you’re mine I feel no shame in doing this.” I have to admit I was a little surprised when he leaned down and kissed me. However, this time I kissed him back, tightening my hold on his waist, pulling him a little closer. Before the kiss could go further, though he pulled away and rested his forehead against mine. “I’ll call you after my schedule alright?” Once again, I found myself completely tongue-tied but this time I didn’t mind too much so I just nodded. He smiled and kissed my cheek before letting me go and stepped back. “Now you better finish that pizza and no more skipping meals you.” Still unable to find the right words I nodded. “Good,” He stepped forward again and gave me a brief hug; “I’ll see you soon.” 

“Alright, be careful.” Oh, look I can talk again. 

“Of course.”

He was at the door and was about to open it before suddenly stopping and turning back around. With a mischievous look in his eyes, he darted back to me and leaned over the desk, kissed me, and then darted away laughing before I had time to react. It took a minute or so before I snapped out of my daze and squealed, spinning around and smiling like an idiot. 

“See I told you it would work.” 

I nearly stumbled back when Skyler’s voice reached my ears. He was at the door with his arms crossed over his chest and a pleased look on his face. Chuckling lightly I sat down and motioned for him to sit with me. “Did you come here to gloat, celebrate with me or to eat the pizza?”

“Mmm a little bit of all three.” He closed the door behind him and practically ran over to the chair. Once in it he scooted closer and leaned forward his eyes sparkling, waiting for dirty details. “Now will you tell me if he’s a good kisser or not?”

There was no way I was going to give into him that easily. Then again, he did say that his current boy toy was quite the kisser as well. “Hmmm I’ll just say you should be jealous my dear best friend I don’t think I’ll be able to stop smiling for a while.”

Despite the lack of detail, Skyler seemed pleased with the answer and wrapped an arm around my shoulder. “Good! We need more pep around the apartment I tell you! Maybe you can stop writing all those ridiculously sad ballads now.” He teased using his free hand to poke my side.

I laughed with him and tried to wiggle away from his finger before I looked over at my computer and it suddenly hit me. “The song!” Standing up I pulled at my hair and groaned, “Crap what am I going to do now? There is no way I can get back in that mood to write the song for Gina’s album in time!”

Skyler did not lose his smile and grabbed my wrist, successfully pulling me back into my seat. “Girl, just share pizza with your best friend now and worry about it later.”

“But-”

He handed the half-eaten piece to me and covered my mouth with his hand. “Later.”

Seeing no point in arguing I moved his hand away and took a bite of the pizza. Skyler grinned and took one of the remaining slices. He continued to try to get me to spill all the details about what happened despite how many times I told him that there was not much to tell. A few minutes later my phone vibrated against the desk and ignoring Skyler’s teasing I checked it. Not surprisingly, it was Kikwang and the smile that had yet to disappear grew.  Don’t work too hard you looked tired when I saw you <3 

Yeah the song could wait for another day.

A/N

To be honest I'm not as proud of this one as my last two I really have so much to improve on and this story showed me that.

Though I think it's fitting I should finish this on my AFF anniversary.

Thank you everyone who read this and stuck with me from the start I love all of you so, so much.  And I promise to return a better author.

Hope to see you again.