Us against the world

Description

When Minseok is running out of time, Luhan decides to give him the bite. A vamp!au

for everyone @ soccerncoffee (originally posted here on lj)
Xiumin/Luhan
PG | 3,422 w. 
 

Foreword

There are few places where Luhan can truly relax, where his mind is most clear.

The top floor of their apartment complex is one, where no one is supposed to go. It isn't too far high up, and the surrounding locations are more apartments and white buildings. But Luhan likes it because with a busy schedule, a growing population, moving up allows him to breathe. Time doesn't move forward like how it appears to be. Down below in the city, time is ten times faster than it is up above where clouds drift by and birds glide.

The alleyway between two neighboring apartment buildings is another, which looks more beautiful at night than in the day. The orange fluorescent lighting gives the area a tint that calms him, and it's empty of lost, wandering souls.

Tonight, this is where he tries to seek solace, but he feels anything but calm.

Luhan lets out a puff of smoke from his cigarette, arm dangling outside of a car.

He rarely smokes, but it's just one of those nights. Flicking his wrist, Luhan sits up straight while heaving out a sigh.

When he closes his eyes, he can hear Minseok's anguished cries from upstairs.

He opens his eyes, and in certain angles, a glow of red reflects off of them.

The time on the dashboard reads 3 a.m. And he supposes it's time he pretended to go to sleep.

------------------

In a cramped room with piles of clothes and instruments lying about, Luhan wakes up to the sound of muffled groaning.

His eyes are open wide now, and he slowly inhales. He doesn't take long to adjust to the darkness, and soon, he's able to see clearly from under his covers.

Yixing is snoring softly in the bed across the room, and Luhan tries to find the source of the groan.

Baekhyun, Jongdae and Chanyeol are in the living room watching a movie while trying to stifle their obnoxious laughters. (It isn't working, of course.)

That leaves Minseok and their manager in the farthest bedroom of the apartment. Luhan closes his eyes and concentrates, trying to focus on someo—Minseok's uneven breathing.

A frantic whisper calls out Minseok's name; Luhan furrows his eyebrows as the warmth intensifies inside of him.

The bite wasn't holding.

------------------

Nothing really changes after the bite. It's not like he has to avoid garlic or sunlight or crosses. Bullets, silver or not, would most definitely hurt him. Wait. Luhan pauses mid-step as he's about to go into the kitchen.

That's werewolves, not vampires. Oops.

The point is, Luhan adapted. He adapted to this life quickly and quietly, and he was on his own as well. So when Luhan finds himself constantly waking up in the middle of the night, listening to Minseok thrash about in his sleep, he worries. Of course he worries. He's the one responsible, after all.

In a world with over seven billion inhabitants, 10% are supernatural in some capacity. Luhan and Minseok are part of it now, but the latter wasn't supposed to go through so much pain. It was supposed to be easy.

One would think that a dying man would have a better reaction to the bite than someone who was perfectly healthy, but here we are.

------------------

Luhan was never directly told of the news. It just happened one night when Minseok came back from a doctor's appointment and Luhan smelled death. The confirmation came when he overheard Minseok and the manager.

It's serious. In the late stages. Found out too late even though there were signs. No one thought to do anything. There were signs, damn it.

“Please don't let the others know.” Minseok said desperately in the confinement of their bedroom. “I'll tell them myself.”

The manager sighed heavily, “Minseok, don't overwork yourself. Go home, spend some time with your family. You're done here.”

Silence.

Luhan gulped, closing his eyes. He heard his heart thumping against his chest, and Minseok's overwhelmed aura. He felt the anxiety, the weight of his body.

Luhan wished he could be in the room with them to take some of the pain away. He wished that there was a way to get rid of the cancer. Mostly, he wished that Minseok went to him first for advice or something. Anything. They were the same age, and Luhan had thought that Minseok would be able to tell him his problems.

He finally heard a defeated chuckle.

“This is all I have, hyung.”

Shortly after, there's scuffling and their bedroom door opened and closed.

“Minseok-hyung, do you want some beef jerky?” Chanyeol called out and Luhan looked up in attempt to meet Minseok's eyes. But it was too late; the older man was walking out the front door, chin high, not looking back.

“What stick does he have up his ?” Chanyeol asked while chewing on said beef jerky he was going to offer.

“Shut it, .” Jongdae replied, throwing a shoe at the tall man's head.

------------------

It was a difficult decision to make, coming out of the vampire closet by doing something life changing. All this without consulting the recipient of his bite.

Most of the mental preparations took months, but he was easily swayed when he saw and felt Minseok's fatigued state. For five weeks straight, Minseok would randomly leave for his doctor's appointment, and every single time, Minseok came back weaker than ever before. It started off with bags underneath his eyes, before it escalated to bones prominently appearing against his white, fragile skin.

There wasn't a moment of hesitation. Luhan had to keep Minseok alive, and modern technology was failing.

------------------

Minseok only let out a mere yelp when Luhan grabbed him; he tried to fight back but was too weak.

Luhan can still taste Minseok's sweat, can feel the pulse of his heart escalating. He remembers the fear in the older man's eyes, the smothered cry that he let out as fangs pierced skin.

The warmth that flowed into his veins as he on Minseok's blood resonated within him. It was the first time Luhan bit a human—a living being for that matter.

“I'm sorry, Minseokkie.” Luhan whispered into his ear. Minseok's cold body was rigid in his arms. The smaller man was shivering, squeezing his eyes shut as if he was living in a nightmare.

Luhan did his best to carry Minseok back to his bed, but only succeeded in bringing him back to the living room couch. He laid Minseok down, and brushed his hair with his fingers.

Luhan tried to whisper comforting words, but he couldn't come up with anything without sounding creepy. After placing a kiss on Minseok's head, he stood up and grabbed a pack of cigarettes and headed out the door.

When Luhan checked in on him a couple hours later, Minseok was gone.

------------------

Luhan hoped that Minseok would one day forgive him, and he knew that the bite would have created a...strain in their relationship.

They were somewhat close before, but now Minseok doesn't even look at him. It's only when they're in the public's eye that Luhan is able to be physically close to him.

Concerts. Photoshoots. Traveling.

Otherwise, Minseok stays as far away from him as possible. And Luhan gets so sick of it because he never wanted this to happen. He never thought that giving Minseok more time would take away their time.

But in the long run, as long as Minseok was alive, anything was worth it.

Nowadays, they spent their time preparing for their concert, so time flew by easily. Some nights, Luhan spent so much time practicing, that he wouldn't even notice if Minseok was in the room.

When they did have to talk, it was curt and courteous, but no one in the group ever mentions anything.

He's grateful for their silence.

------------------

Concert venues are the worst because they're in a confined space, which means the sound will echo. He'll hear thousands of men and women, girls and boys screaming their name, and Luhan can only do so much before it overwhelms him.

Beside him, Minseok is also screaming at the top of his lungs, hopping around the stage.

The beat of the bass drum matches his heartbeat, and Luhan waits for his cue before belting out some lyrics. When he looks to Minseok, his eyes are sparkling a bit more than usual; his body looks lighter, and he knows that this is when Minseok is truly alive.

Luhan closes his eyes. Time seems to stop, and all he can hear is his own breathing. All he can feel is Minseok's warmth. But the moments are always brief. As quickly as the warmth comes to wrap around him, it disappears.

He opens his eyes again and Minseok is making his way toward Chanyeol on the drums.

For Luhan, the song is over.

------------------

“What's wrong with you and Minseok-hyung?” Jongdae asks candidly, and Luhan blinks rapidly. He swallows what water he has in his mouth and puts his water bottle down.

Jongdae sighs. “You guys are so tense that no one knows how to act around you at all.”

Luhan doesn't know what to say. He thought it would be a hiccup, a brief lapse in time.

“Luhan-hyung, please. Just...just figure it out. It's been going on for months.”

Luhan nods silently and Jongdae squeezes his shoulder while walking by.

It had been months. Months.

The concept of time has been completely warped for him, and most nights Luhan finds himself upstairs or in the van, lost in his thoughts.

He's tried to give Minseok as much space as possible, unsure of how to approach him about the whole vampire thing. It's not like he can just barge into Minseok's room when he has his nightmares or intense pains.

“It's taking a toll on the others too, huh?” Minseok asks, popping up from around the corner. Luhan slightly jumps, not expecting him to be here.

It's the first time Luhan and Minseok have been alone since the incident, and Luhan holds his breath. Minseok looks better, and Luhan hasn't had the chance to really notice it. Of course, the smell of death is almost gone now, but while Minseok's skin looks paler, it looks a lot healthier. The glowing in his eyes that were clearly shining before is still there under certain lighting. Minseok's lips are more pink, and Luhan focuses his eyes on Minseok's eyes again.

An awkward silence lingers in the air as Luhan tries to comment back with something witty or smart or anything at all really, but he only stands there gaping.

“Alright, so I've got a question for you.” Minseok cutly starts and Luhan gulps because this conversation can go in so many different directions he's not sure what to expect.

“Why do you need me alive?” Minseok asks and throws him an annoyed and frustrated look.

Luhan is thrown off guard. He's never seen this face before, and he finds himself vulnerable, pushed back into a corner.

“I...You'd be missed, Minseok. You can't throw this away.” Luhan says weakly, but easily. “You can't just leave us, we won't allow it.”

He bites back his tongue. You can't leave me.

“We?” Minseok asks incredulously before guffawing out, “You're ing with nature, Luhan.”

Luhan bites his lip hard, trying to find the right words, form the right sentences to make this okay.

“I was ready, you know.” Minseok goes on, hands shaking. “I accepted it.”

Minseok closes his eyes and lets out a defeated sigh, “What am I supposed to do with myself now, Luhan? You turned me into a vampire, and I'm supposed to just move on? Be happy that I'm alive? I never even ing told you and you did it anyway. But that's how it always goes with you, isn't it? Luhan our savior.”

Luhan has never seen Minseok so emotionally raw. The fear, hate, bitterness, anxiety all lash out at him and even though his words hurt, Luhan doesn't care. He'll take the beating.

He steps closer and Minseok sidesteps him.

“Stay the away from me. I never want to speak to you again.”

Minseok pushes past his shoulder and disappears.

Luhan wasn't sure there was anything left to fix.

------------------

It's difficult to avoid someone when schedules are more packed than ever before. The backdrop behind him is a sunset.

"Minseok, lean a bit closer to Luhan, that's it." A photographer says and Luhan throws his best grin at the camera, waiting for the split second of white flash. Beside him, Minseok is doing the same, but Luhan can sense the threatening aura coming out of him.

They finish the shoot quickly, and when Luhan turns the corner to the break room, he's stopped when the entire group (sans Minseok) is staring at him.

Jongdae rolls his eyes. "This is getting ridiculous. Luhan, I don't know what's going on between you and Minseok. No one does because you're so lost in your own bubble the world doesn't even matter to you guys."

Luhan blinks blankly.

"It's not a bad thing." Baekhyun pipes up, looking up from his phone screen. "It just means that no matter what happens, good or bad, just remember that the world is watching. The rest of us are holding our breaths, waiting for the outcome because whatever you have is so pure, we don't know where you're going to take it."

In the background, Chanyeol is gagging on his soup and Yixing is patting his back.

Jongdae scoffs. "Baekhyun, half of that didn't even make sense."

Baekhyun lets out a loud and dragged out heyyyyyyyyy in the background and Jongdae continues. "What he means is that we're here for you guys."

Jongdae places a hand on his shoulder. "We're a group, and you need to let us know when there's a problem so we can solve it together."

Luhan smiles, the side of his eyes crinkling. "Thanks. It means a lot, guys."

He opens the door to the break room and everyone finds seats around him.

After a moment of nodding reassuringly amongst themselves, Jongdae and Baekhyun turn to Chanyeol.

"So, spit it out." Chanyeol says to Luhan, gulping down more food.

Luhan inhales deeply, wishing so badly that Minseok told the others before it happened. He knew they were going to ask questions, and because it's been going on for so long, he doesn't know what to say.

"It's just...it's not my place to say." Luhan runs a hand through his hair. “Besides, why do you guys keep thinking it's something I did?"

"You're Luhan, that's why." Yixing says easily and the others murmur agreement.

Luhan begins to retort but then everyone's expression stiffens.

He closes his eyes briefly. Minseok's behind him.

Luhan wonders how much Minseok has heard, but before anyone is able to say anything, Minseok's voice raises up.

"I was dying. Before."

Minseok exhales slowly while rolling up his sleeves, looking at the rest of the group. He walks past Luhan and pulls up a chair.

He places his hands on his knees, and his left heel is tapping the floor.

"I was dying and now I'm not." Minseok tries to smile comfortingly, but it's hard when death isn't a small deal like the chicken pox.

Luhan watches as the rest of the group sinks into their seats.

Chanyeol is the one who breaks the silence. "And you didn't think to share that with us?"

"Not at first, no."

Jongdae furrows his eyebrows. “So why now?”

“I'm just ready now.” Minseok simply says, eyes scanning around the room before they land on Luhan.

Luhan quickly averts his eyes to the ground. The turn of events is not what he was expecting, and before anyone is able to say anything, their manager calls them for the next item on the menu.

------------------

The smell of coffee wakes Luhan up. He inhales deeply, eyes open wide to adjust in the darkness. When he senses there isn't a danger, he gets up from bed and makes his way to the kitchen...only to see Minseok's back to him. As per usual.

Luhan tries to make little noise and go back into his room, but Minseok clears his throat.

“I tried really hard to think that this was a nightmare.” Minseok starts, and Luhan stiffens.

“And in a way, it still is.” Minseok smiles sadly. “I was lost and angry and confused about what you are Luhan, about how you could do what you did. I never even had the chance to tell everyone properly before you gave me something else entirely. Now, I feel like I'm part of the living, yet dead at the same time.”

Before Luhan can respond, Jongdae and Baekhyun make a commotion that wakes the rest of the apartment up and Luhan can't catch Minseok's attention again.

------------------

Luhan has two favorite places when he needs to clear his head. One is the alleyway between the neighboring apartment complex and their own. The other...the other happens to be Minseok's favorite place, up on the roof. Luhan looks at his watch and the time reads 5:49 on a seemingly random Sunday evening. Except it's been a year now since Minseok got the bite.

The frantic mutters and whispers and sweating stopped after a couple months, but the ignoring lasted for so much of it that Luhan had thought that he would never have the chance to talk to him again. But here we are. Luhan is standing at the entrance of the door and sincerely wishes that Minseok didn't look so tragically beautiful.

He's lighting up a cigarette. The orange and pink sky glows in front of him, and all Luhan can see is Minseok's silhouette and a cloud of smoke reaching for the skies.

Luhan clears his throat, but Minseok doesn't move.

“I'm so sorry, Minseok. For this. For not telling you. For not being here when you needed me.” Luhan says, raising his voice. “I'm sorry for everything, but I need you alive. You have to know that you mean a lot to so many people. You've touched so many souls, that it would just be too crushing if...if you...”

Minseok coughs, chuckling. “You know...You're a vampire so you sense all the different things I'm feeling even when we're rooms apart."

Luhan takes it as his cue to walk toward Minseok.

"And you turned me into someone who can do the same." Minseok hasn't changed his position. "The intensity of your feelings can be very overwhelming sometimes, you know that, Luhan? Your constant warmth. It's full of want and worry and pining and--"

"Love. It's full of love and I've never tried once to hide it, because besides this...vampire thing, I've always felt comfortable to tell you anything." Luhan says, finally reaching him. "And I thought you felt the same way about me."

Luhan lets out a laugh while sitting down because it's almost been half a year since it all started, yet it's been so much longer since Luhan tried to convince himself that he didn't feel something for Minseok.

There's a comforting silence, and Luhan doesn't dare to look up.

He doesn't know what to expect, nor can he get a reading of Minseok's emotions. But when he does look up, Minseok is looking down, smiling halfheartedly.

“People are always telling us we're two peas in a pod, right?”

Luhan smiles, extending a hand out. “You're never going to be able to get rid of me, you know.”

Minseok laughs, placing his hand in Luhan's open palm. Luhan sighs a breath of relief. Warmth is overwhelming him again.

“Just give me some time, Luhan.”

Luhan tightens his grip on Minseok, interlacing their fingers together.

“Haven't you heard? We've got all the time in the world.”

Minseok's grin grows wider and he turns to look at the setting sun.

They're a long way from where they were before, but this is a step. Maybe one day Luhan will be able to learn all there is to know about Kim Minseok and more. One day, Luhan will teach Minseok how to control his abilities more, to tune down the warmth he's letting out. One day, they'll be in a room, snooping on Chanyeol and Jongdae arguing over something minute while Baekhyun and Yixing share a look. Though one doesn't necessarily need superhuman powers to hear that.
The most important thing though, is that time isn't an enemy anymore.

And they've got absolutely nothing to lose.

Comments

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minmin17 #1
that was so good i don't think i'll be able to stop rereading it ;-;
Johanne #2
Wonderful.
It was beautifully written^^
xiubootybuns
#3
Amazing. I love it. Great job! ^-^