I feel... sad. To be honest, i have this wierd whirlwind of feeling inside of me.. i dont know anymore.

When I first heard about it as I've mentioned I'm currently working and I was just informed by someone, then people started texting and calling me, regarding Baekhyun, basically because almost everone who knows me knew he was one of my top bias.

It wasn't the fact that he was dating Taeyeon. I mean, wow , who wouldn't want a Tae right?not just any girl, leader of gg, top group, sment, and he likes her very much..  he is now dating the girl of his DREAMS.. In the back of my mind, i knew things like this would come, we can't avoid it, when the other gg members reaveled their relationships, i was laughing saying that Tae would be the next one, and hey, she did, and it was the bomb. they re just humans. its just that, i dont know, and I'm pretty sure not only Baek is the member with a relationship.. right? It also came to me that maybe, Baek would be one of the members who would have a relationship first, knowing his carefree character, etc, Well damn, he's funny, charming, and cute. who wouldn't be immuned to that?? but yeah too sudden. I'm pretty happy that he found his own happiness and the one which he loved dearly. 4 months is a lot,(which basically Sments favorite month on revealing relationships if you would notice) so I'm sure they're both pretty serious about it, even though this is a sunbae-hoobae relationship. Altho, they just mentioned that this is topmost secrecy but why did they became carless regarding their relationship...? EVERYONE IS AWARE THAT A FAN MAYBE SOMETIMES DELUSIONAL BUT NO ONE CAN’T DENY THAT THEY CAN BE CONSIDERED AS THE MODERN SHERLOCKS..  

When the photos of the leaked couple surfed across the internet, all i could think was 'Why? Who would even be stupid enough to go date in the car. one that is convertible and where everyone could see what was happening inside? IF you want to kiss, do it privately,... " What I can't seem to look past is that he just had to announce it when Exostans were still trying to recover from Kris's shock and departure for leaving. It takes a toll on us. I get it, I'm sure EXO was pretty shaken up by the news of the latter sue-ing SM. They're humans, we should understand them. But we're fans and we have hearts too, we feel things even when it musn't be all the same feelings that can be compared to their pain. As much as I respect and accept Baekhyun's decision for dating Taeyeon (Please don't bash , BAEK REALLY LIKES HER and if she makes him happy, let her be. And anyway, she's such a nice kid boyish leader that's always smiling. Nobody is perfect and she already apologized for nothing, which she didn’t need to do since it was her life but she still did. so give her some credit will you?THE OREO THO..TT.TT) I keep on putting out of my mind the issue that they were just mocking our obliviousness through these pictures. I mean, maybe they are just finding a way to communicate which each other.. heh. Still, He could have just announced it at a later period, when the fans are in a much better condition to take on that impact of heartbreak. 

Lets face it, I ve read this somewhere…Baek and Tae are one of well-known person in the music industry in korea. One wrong move could light up a scandal and burn them down into ashes. But, in this world where every person was fascinated by the Them, Lets say Baekhyun were a lot of female fans are into him, was never hated nor criticized but the netizens. If there's a scandal that broke out about him or the other members, the one who published will be blamed. If there's a negative comment thrown at the singer, thousands of hurtful words will be thrown to the person. If there's a girl's or boy's name that linked to the their name, the netizen will beat down the poor person into pulp with harsh words and terrifying threats. In short, everyone is mesmerized by their beauty, wealth, talent and attitude that they veiled their eyes at the darker side of them.

Even i didn't experience yet to be in a relationship with someone in real. I already experienced to be broken with someone who doesn't know me. I think i need my time to reflect and sit alone for a while, just thinking of the reality of the situation. Things would never be the same.

I also want to say this, to those who are hurt, disappointed with these issue, let us not cover our hearts with negativity, some might waver their support, some may come back some may don’t but think of our hardships, pains, happiness and feels, I trust your opinions but think of the members too.and to those who are not that affected , I know some are irritated with what the other fans are acting right now, calling them childish, stupid, etc,  some may said that those are not considered a fan if they cant handle issues but please, understand.. We are all humans here and everyone is different so its only natural on how a person reacts on a situation, Please, us fans should not fight with each other, let us not be an additional burden.

As a message for the couple. I hope they find their happiness even with the constant bashing and rumours flying around. I really think they deserve a shot at the happiness they've been looking for. I congratulate them, maybe not wholeheartedly, but I know that even though I'm feeling like this now, I'll still support Baek matter what happens, all the way. I may be hurt right now but I’ll stay. Always think of our sunshine boy, his smile, his happiness. hope that your happiness would last forever Byun baekhyunJ

I just hope that after this shocking issue, they won’t broke up that easily I mean, I weep and cry until my lungs hurts so I don’t think I deserve that kind of result… you know what I mean? Also wouldn’t be that awkward or anything since they are of the same company…They should stay strong after all our reactions. hehe

2013 is one of the best, 2014 is an obstacle.

I'm pretty shaken up by it i guess, it took me a lot to finally go on AFF again and dare to post. IM DEALING  THIS WITH MY OWN WAY,  I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SAY, I HAVE MY REASONS, WERE ALL IN THE STATE OF MOVING ON. I JUST HOPE ALL OF US CAN HANDLE OUR MISERIES VERY WELL AND POSITIVELY. Thank you for listening to my rant Let's be strong together fighting!!

I hope that all of us can recover by the thing that happened lately. It’s hard to be happy right now but let’s just accept that Baekhyun is really dating. Even though he promised us that he will start dating in the age of 35, this thing would make him happy and who are us to stop him and I know it will take time to heal all the pain. It’s not bad to be sad and to complain because of the things that made us hurt. I hope that we can continue on supporting Baekhyun unto the end. We don’t have to be happy right know. We just need to accept it little by little and if we fully accept what’s happening, that would lead us to happiness.

Some may react how this issue was connected with Kris, here’s a post I’ve read.. you can read this but im not forcing you to believe or anything, http://oshflowerboy.tumblr.com/post/89248295102/i-dont-know-ehy-but-i-feel-like-this-dating-scandal-is

ME: 25.media.tumblr.com/3ff6977175c8307179bcb559a2f14fe3/tumblr_mzxn19jxCT1qfo1i3o2_500.gif

IM IN A DILLEMMA THAT MY KOKORO CLENCHES AND ACHED TOO MUCH YET I CANT STAND NOT SEEING HIM..  I WANT TO SEE HIM SO BAD. 

ANYWAYS.... EXO SEE YOU IN YOUR CONCERT HERE! 

LULU AND SEHUN SEE YOU MY BABIES (AND BAEK)