“ Tae! You ready man?”

“ Yeah, just give me a sec!” I said as I adjusted the beanie on my head that covers my long blonde hair.

As I set foot on the dark music video set, the nervousness starts to set in. I took a deep breath and tried to clear my mind, but a single lone thought lingered in my head.

Do you know I’m singing and writing this songs for you?

I slowly walked into position as the director gave me an overview on how they were going to film it once again with the suggestion from YG sajangnim. I nod my head courteously as I went through the things he said in my mind on my own. I raise my hands and adjust the chain necklace hung on my bare body before going into position, receiving a thumbs up from the director The song started with a lady’s voice filling the whole set before the heavy piano keys set in. Action. Images of her flash through my mind as I parted my lips and started singing.

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[ 4 years ago ]

“Jagiya~ Good Morning!” she called out softly in my ears as my eyes slowly flutter awake. I took in the stunning visual right in front of my eyes. Tracing her facial features with my eyes starting from her messy bed hair to her smooth forehead, her light grey brows, her beautiful almond shape black coloured eyes which were always filled with joy. Her cute button nose which fitted her face perfectly and her natural pretty red lips which were as kissable as always. A stunning visual right in front of me.

“good morning!” I replied in my husky morning voice earning a cute giggle warming the insides of me. I puckered up my lips for a morning kiss but instead i got a whack on my arm making me wince in pain which made her laugh in her high pitch voice making me fall in love with her again and again. sometimes I wonder how on earth did I get a girl like her. Sweet, smart, beautiful and charming.

“Get up you lazy bum! I made breakfast for you already! Quickly wash up!! Quickly!!” she said as she rolled me off our bed and push me into the bathroom. While she went out and continue to prepare our breakfast on a lazy Sunday. I looked into the mirror and a man with long blonde hair unshaven chin, small eyes with buff arms looking back at me. My brothers/bandmates describe me as a shy and playful guy which could never ever look at any pretty lady in the eyes. Which was true. Until I met her. Her soft chocolate eyes kept my eyes from wandering about and for the first time ever i managed to look into a lady’s eyes.

“ Dong Young Bae! Did you faint in the toilet?! “ she yelled banging loudly on the door “ The food is going to be cold if you don’t come out now!” I chuckled and open the door startling her. I caught her by the waist and swoop in for a quick peck on the lips. Cheesy I know but well. I’m in love with this woman in my arms. “ Arraso princess I’m out. Let’s see what did you cook today!” I said as I swept her off her feet and carry her bridal style to the kitchen before setting her on her chair. “Hmmm…. smells nice… baby your cooking skills improved….” I as she shot me a nasty glance which made my heart go thumping in my chest as we started eating and talking about anything and everything under the sun laughing and joking like best friends. Best Friends Turned Lover. How does that sound? No, no. Not Ji Yong. Yes, he might be my best friend but I don’t swing that way you know. Her. The woman in front of me is my best friend turned lover.

We shared many moments together. She meant the world to me and I would give up anything for her. I love her to death. The moment I was distanced from her, it felt as though I’m dead. I feel alive next to her. With her, I can be myself, be Dong Young Bae the normal man and not the idol Taeyang even though she love me no matter who I am. Because of my celebrity status, we were careful when we are going out and although we had a few occasional brush with the paparazzi,nothing much happened. Although I’m pretty sure there are fans out there who somehow knew about our relationship as I received a few fan cards with the words “ Stay happy and shine like a sun with the pretty lady you are dating!” I was glad I had understanding fans but, unfortunately, not all fans are like that sweet fan so we still had to keep a low profile.

I guess this might be one of the few reasons why the cracks starts showing.

She was my first official girlfriend. The first girl that I ever truly love and dated with my heart. Meeting her was one of the best things that happened in my life. I was truly happy with her. Blissful should be the right word to use. I was in cloud 9 after meeting her. Being my first girlfriend and with the fact that I had a celebrity status placed a large strain on me. I was overly protective of her. I was afraid of the fans reaction when they found out about her and our relationship. I was afraid of those guys who looked at her like they would sn