Kevin waited in his kitchen, absent-mindedly playing with his phone. He was still looking at the last message he had received 10 minutes ago, which was a simple be there soon. He wondered how long soon was - 10 minutes, 20, 30? He supposed it didn’t matter. He had been waiting all day.

Earlier, some of his friends had invited him out for drinks and he had declined. “But it’s Saturday night,” they said. “What else are you doing?”

“I have a friend coming over,” he had told them.

The word friend was suspicious to them, and they immediately asked questions like “what sort of friend? Is it that sort of friend?” Kevin told them that it was his friend visiting from out of town, and he hoped that they would leave it at that. Truthfully though, he would have like to tell someone about it, but it would be difficult to explain and it was probably best not to tell.

Kevin had already eaten, since it was past 9pm already. He had not been particularly hungry, but he ate his dinner anyway, just as a habit. As he did so, it struck him just how miserable it was to eat alone like this every night, and how badly he wanted to be able to share dinner with someone. If only Kwanghee had come earlier, then they could have eaten together, but then again, that wasn’t the most important thing.

Kevin heard footsteps and anticipated the doorbell. He got up to answer it a few seconds early, taking Kwanghee by surprise.

“Look happy to see me,” he said jokingly, when Kwanghee stared at him with surprise.

He shook his head. “I’m really tired. The flight was delayed, and I almost forgot where you live.”

“So typical, you just got here and you are already whining...”

Kwanghee laughed. “I’m sorry Kevin, you know me...”

“Do you want something to eat?”

“No, not hungry, but thank you.”

They stood silently a moment, about a metre apart, paused and waiting for the other to say something. At last Kevin stepped up to him.

“Let me take your coat off.” He pulled it off slowly and hung it on the hat stand as Kwanghee watched him, smiling.

“It’s cold outside,” Kwanghee said, a somewhat random complaint and Kevin wasn’t sure what he meant by it. He took Kevin’s hand and brought it to his cheek. “I’m cold, aren’t I?”

Kevin smiled sheepishly. “A bit,” he said, and then placed his hand on the other cheek and brought their faces together.

They kissed briefly, then pulled apart. “You smell different,” Kwanghee said. “Did you change your aftershave?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

“It smells nice, anyway.”

Kevin put both arms around Kwanghee’s neck and pulled him in again. This time he was more aggressive, kissing with an open mouth. After a bit, Kwanghee pushed him back with a hand on the chest. “Gee Kevin,” he said, “you’re really eager. I haven’t even been here for five minutes, and you’re already trying to eat my face. You haven’t even offered me any tea yet.”

Kevin laughed, but really he was feeling frustrated. I’ve been waiting all day for this, he thought. He squeezed Kwanghee’s sides gently. “I’ve missed you a lot. Do you want some tea?”

“Hmm, no, not really. Is it okay if I use your shower?”

“Of course, go on.”

Kevin let him go reluctantly, and turned to wait for him in the bedroom. The waiting wasn’t so bad now, now that he almost had what he wanted. He was filled with a dull ache, an enjoyable ache that he knew was about to be satisfied.

Kwanghee would typically take his time, so he waited curled up on the bed. When Kwanghee came back, he put his arms out. “Come here,” he said.

Kwanghee laughed. “What are you like that for? You look like a puppy.”

Kevin laughed too. “I am a puppy.” He knew what it was, like being locked up in a garden, waiting for his master to return home.

He waited with his arms out, until Kwanghee came to him, , warm and damp, and alive. It’s good to finally be together again, he thought, and he was happy, though even his happiness was bittersweet because he knew it wouldn’t last for long.

After they had made love, Kwanghee seemed to fall asleep immediately, and Kevin couldn’t get anything else out of him, so he just pressed their foreheads together and closed his eyes. He wasn’t able to sleep himself, he was too would up still, but he was content just to feel the rise and fall of his lover’s breathing, as they lay together, sharing the same air.

He was distracted by the sound of a phone beeping. He wasn’t expecting a message from anyone, and when he reached over to the phone on the bedside table, he realised that it was Kwanghee’s phone, not his. It was unlocked, so he opened the message. Kwanghee was still sleeping.

He read it over a couple of times. It said, I hope you arrived safely. I’m going to bed now, so don’t call me. I miss you~

Kevin calmly put the phone back on the bedside table. He considered waking Kwanghee to tell him about it, but decided against it, since the message had not been pressing. He went back to lying curled up with Kwanghee, not sleeping, but just lying there. His body was tense now and he couldn’t relax. At last Kwanghee opened his eyes, and he noticed that Kevin was changed. He brushed the hair away from his face.

“What’s the matter? Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m alright. I’m not tired though.”

“Ah, I’m sorry. I fell asleep.”

“It’s okay, you can sleep. I’m okay just staying like this.”

Kwanghee kissed his forehead. “I can be with you tomorrow for as long as you like. I don’t have to go anywhere until Monday, so we can have tomorrow.”

Kevin was only half listening. He was still thinking about the message. I miss you! They have only been separated for a few hours, and here I am by myself all the time. It made him furious in a way. He thought about how Kwanghee had been his first love, and only love, since Kevin had a way of holding on to things. “I’m just a one love kind of guy,” he had told him once. “I’ll probably stick to you forever.” That had been a sweet thing, back when they used to be together.

He was sulky now and conjuring up these thoughts had ruined his brief happiness. But it was his own fault. I won’t stop loving you, even after you’ve stopped loving me... He curled himself even tighter on the bed.

“Are you okay baby?” Kwanghee patted his hair, like he was a pet.

“You got a message from your wife. She said not to call.”

“Alright. Don’t talk about it now, though. You know what the situation is.”

Do I really? Kevin thought to himself.

“Is that why you’re upset?”

“I’m not upset.”

“Okay...”

“It’s just hard... I get lonely sometimes.”

“Well, I’m here now.” Kwanghee rolled over a bit, and pressed his teeth into the crook of Kevin’s neck, causing him to wriggle. He then put a hand on Kevin’s chest to keep him still, and slowly pushed it lower. “You’re just stressed, I’ll make you feel better.”

“Yeah, okay...”

Kevin kind of hated himself for giving in so easily. He turned and pushed his face into the pillow, and winced, then pulled back again so he could breathe. Kwanghee kissed him again, and he fell down defeated.