The sparkling stars and silvery moon seemed to be doing a mime in the cloudless sky.

I sighed as I lay down on my back and stared at the sky, instead of sleeping– like everyone else– during the school camp. Having snuck out from my tent was a great decision, as it gave me the space and time to think about life. Silence lingered around me as I let out a sigh; I was starting to regret being so hotheaded.

Flashback

“What do you mean by that?” a frown slowly made its way onto my face as I questioned my stepbrother.

“I’m leaving for Canada in 3 days.”

“Are you kidding me? Why are you only telling me now?” I snapped at Kyungsoo upon hearing the news.

Shocked at my sudden outburst, Kyungsoo started stuttering. “I…I’m so…sorry but I was afraid that you will be sad so… I didn’t want to tell you that early…”

“Sorry? You should be feeling sorry for only telling me that now!” I huffed and stomped out of the house, much to Kyungsoo’s astonishment. He had never seen this side of me even after living with me under the same roof for more than 2 years.

Why did I even react that way? I should have calmed down and talked to him nicely, but now… He probably had a different perspective of me.

All these reactions from me had a reason – a reason that no one could ever know.

Tears streamed down my face as I thought about it; I had to apologize to him before it was too late.

­

It was finally the day when he had to leave me for Canada.  Kyungsoo had accepted my apology and forgave me, but I could sense the incomprehensiveness in his eyes, for he could not understand why I had lashed out at him that night.

“Oppa…remember to eat well, take care of yourself and if you ever need someone to talk to, remember that I am always here. You can always call me and I’ll definitely answer your call on the first ring, okay?” I said as tears started making its way into my eyes.

Kyungsoo pulled me into an embrace and comforted me, ”Don’t cry, I’m sorry I have to leave you, but I promise I will call you everyday, okay? You have to take care of yourself too, don’t fall sick, understand?”

I nodded and pulled away, as it was time for him to leave.

“Goodbye oppa.” I muttered and waved to him. He did the same before leaving for the gates.

As his back view started getting smaller, my heart started to shatter into pieces. I was a coward; now it’s all too late.

It was like as if we weren’t even close to start with.

I wallowed in self-pity as I stared at a photo of the both of us together. One year. Just one year was enough for him to forget all about me. He didn’t even remember what today was. Scoffing, I tore the photo up and threw it into the dustbin, hoping to forget him – like what he did to me. I didn’t need him in my life, I didn’t need him to celebrate my 18^th birthday, for I wasn’t a little kid anymore.

“Why did you call me? What do you want?” I asked with an annoyed tone, even though my heart was skipping in joy at the thought of him not forgetting me.

“I’m sorry for forgetting your birthday Y/N, I was too busy…” Before he could even finish, I had interrupted him with a scoff, “Busy? Indeed, you’re so busy you even forgot my birthday!”

“Look, I’m really sorry, but guess what? I’m coming back to visit you!” Kyungsoo exclaimed in excitement.

“You…you are? Really? Oh my I’m so excited…”

Girlfriend… that explains why he had been so busy that he even forgot my birthday.

“Nice to meet you, I’m his stepsister….” My voice faltered at the end as I soon came to realize…

It was too late to regret now.

I had missed my chance a year ago.