he night before Yixing had to catch his flight home to Changsha, both he and Taekwoon were huddled on the floor of the living room. Taekwoon had been drifting in and out of space ever since they came home from Ravi's house, focus distorted and nonexistent. He felt crappy about it because the break was supposed to be all about seeing Yixing, spending time with Yixing, his best friend and the only person he felt like he could depend on to be there, but instead . . .

"Woonie, you can stop now." Yixing said, halfway through a movie neither of them were really paying attention to.

Taekwoon peered up at him, practically curled under the blanket. "Stop what . . ." he mumbled into the fabric.

Yixing sighed good-naturedly, "Acting like a guilty puppy."

Taekwoon scowled. "I am not." he replied petulantly.

"Yeah, and the sky isn't blue." Yixing snorted.

Tired of making himself small enough to disappear, Taekwoon huffed and stretched out, sitting up against the couch base. If there was ever a time he wished it was easy for him to talk, now would be it. Yixing was going home tomorrow, and with everything that happened over the last two weeks, Taekwoon was fuller than ever of things to say.

Yixing sat up too. "Alright," he began, "let's start with Ravi."

Taekwoon gawked at him, but he just laughed.

"I know that face." he grinned. Taekwoon turned to a scowl. Yixing gestured with his hands for him to talk.

Taekwoon pulled his bottom lip into his mouth, kneading it with his teeth and finding the words to say. "I . . ." he started slowly, ". . . I don't know what to say. Yixing . . . Yixing, we—I—he . . . k-kissed me." Yixing's indifference fueled his chagrin and his mouth twisted at it and the memories. "What does that even mean?" he groaned. "Why would he do that? I mean, it's not like I was grossed out or anything . . . I don't even know. I don't know. I don't know." He rubbed hard at his face.

"Alright, alright," Yixing soothed, rubbing his shoulder sympathetically. Taekwoon could hear a smile in his voice. "You do know that people kiss other people when they like that person, right?"

"Don't patronize me," Taekwoon snapped, though it came out whiny. "Why would he like me? Who would even like me?"

"I like you," Yixing offered unhelpfully, and then shifted. "Woonie, listen, you know I don't pretend to know more than I do, but if you're afraid Ravi just kissed you and it doesn't mean anything? Don't be. I can see it. Don't worry."

It was quiet a long moment before Yixing said something again. "I think what you should worry about is, do you like him?"

Taekwoon nearly choked on his spit, throwing the other a look that wondered if he was serious. It was reciprocated the total expression of seriousness. He groaned.

That was a question he didn't have an answer to. Ravi had always been a weird presence in his head, a variety of thoughts on his mind. Most of them were confused, but none of them were bad. Were they good, then? He didn't know. Ravi came across in his head many different ways. All he knew was that thinking of Ravi made him feel funny. Maybe not bad-funny. Mainly confused. A little frustrated (at himself).

Taekwoon looked at Yixing, heart beating wildly at all the thoughts, and sure it was easy for Yixing to tell him not to worry—He sighed and laid his head back. Tears of frustration and embarrassment (it was late, no one could blame him for the awful control on his emotions right then) burned at the corner of his eyes.

Clearly seeing that Taekwoon was frustrated, Yixing smiled gently. "Let me put it this way then: How does your body feel when you're around Ravi?"

Taekwoon swallowed thickly. That was easier. ". . . Nervous. He makes me nervous. My heart beats loud and fast . . . I get sweaty palms . . . It's hard to think . . ." He mumbled his way through. He flexed his fingers against the covers.

Yixing nudged him with a knowing smile. Red tinted Taekwoon's face when they met gazes.

"Yixing . . ." he started, throat closing up, "What am I going to do when you're gone?"

To that, Yixing didn't reply for a long moment and his smile faded. Taekwoon uselessly wiped at his face.

Yixing gently maneuvered his head to rest on his shoulder, "Look at it this way, unlike those dramas, I can always come back." he joked.

Taekwoon closed his eyes.

While Yixing was already packed and ready to go, Taekwoon had just woken up and was flattening his hair into something manageable, even though it wanted to stick every which way possible.

"Why didn't you wake me up earlier . . ." he grumbled.

Yixing was already in the kitchen, eating a small breakfast. "You seemed too tired, I thought you should sleep more."

Taekwoon snorted, "Thanks mom."

Moving sluggishly, Taekwoon willed time to go slower so that Yixing didn't have to leave. He didn't know when the next time he would see him would be . . . And now that things were piling up like they were, how was he going to deal with all of it on his own?

As they loaded Yixing's things into Seungho's car, Seungho slipped him several worried glances, as if he knew what tumbled around in his head. He attached himself to Yixing's arm like a sad puppy. Just to keep the mood up, Yixing lightheartedly chatted about his mom and Changsha, and silly memories from when they were growing up.

The closer they got to the airport, the lower Taekwoon's heart sank. School would start again and they'd both have to focus on their futures, so when would they get time to talk again? Would they be able to see each other over the summer? Where would he be living by then? At this point, he knew it was only a matter of time before he moved . . . It twisted horribly at his stomach.

Taekwoon's grip on Yixing's sleeve was steel by the time they were getting out of the car, his head down and lips pressed tightly. Gloom constricted his chest like no other and if he knew it was going to feel this bad, he wouldn't have invited his best friend to come stay in the first place. He could feel a sure eye on him from Seungho but didn't dare look his way.

As if nothing was wrong, Yixing made pleasant conversation with Seungho, telling him about this or that; anything to keep the subject away from what Taekwoon was sure would drive a stake through his heart. He wished that by some small miracle, Yixing's mom would call to let him stay longer, or maybe his flight would come in a day too late, or something that would give them more time together, but no.

No phone call, and the flight was right on time. They were at the boarding site.

Yixing turned to Taekwoon. Seungho was standing by to give them space.

"Taekwoon," Yixing began, a soothing smile on his face—they both knew Taekwoon was on the verge of tears; he clenched his fists by his sides and gnawed at his bottom lip. "Don't give 'old man' Seungho a hard time. Don't give your sisters a hard time. Whenever you see your parents again, just go with the flow. No matter where you move or who you meet, always make the best out of it. Don't fight people, don't be rude. Don't trade secrets like cards."

Tears welled up faster than could be stopped.

"People aren't always out to get you, and not everyone wants to make your life miserable." Yixing's hands were on his shoulders, holding firmly, "About Ravi . . ." Taekwoon tensed. "This probably sounds awfully cliché, but . . . Follow your heart."

That was when Taekwoon picked his head up, tears accidentally falling from his wide eyes. Yixing smiled, a little teasing, mainly reassuring. He nodded once, and then Taekwoon fell into him, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist and burying his face into his neck. Seungho had to look away.

Yixing chuckled softly, arms easily winding around his back and patting softly and consolingly. Taekwoon mumbled something completely unintelligible, but of course Yixing was able to make it out.

"I'll miss you too, Woonie."

Leaving the airport and on the way home, Seungho didn't bother trying to comfort Taekwoon. His misery was tangible and drowned every corner of the car, and not even soft music could puncture it even little. He glanced from the road to Taekwoon every now and then, only to see him boring into his phone, as if he wanted it to go off.

Seungho wasn't sure what to do at a time like this. It was a given that Taekwoon would be sad when Yixing left, but he never gave much weight to how bad it would be.

Eyes on the road, he figured it was more than that; Taekwoon talked about Yixing in a certain way—how he was a stable factor in his life, a constant that he could always think about for comfort with a smile. As it were, Seungho supposed that sort of foundation and stability had been missing from Taekwoon's life, and for him, it was hard to let go when he had a taste of it.

While they drove, he thought more on it and decided it'd be best if he didn't take him home. The last thing Taekwoon needed right now was to lock himself away and mope until school started again. It pulled Taekwoon from his brooding when they made a turn away from their apartments to look at him curiously.

He felt Taekwoon's questioning look didn't need answering as he pulled in to a small restaurant he frequented often, especially to think.

Taekwoon was sluggish in getting out of the car but at least decided to not be more trouble than he was worth at the moment. Seungho was quiet and a little weird, but he was doing that thing again where he was clearly out of his emotional depth and doing the best he could to comfort him without being overbearing about it. Taekwoon wouldn't admit it, but—he felt a little grateful.

The hostess guided them to a low table off to the side and they ordered drinks. Taekwoon saw that Seungho seemed to know her, so he tuned out of their conversation. Yixing's flight was already in the air and it would still be three-plus hours before he could call him. He deflated at the thought. His apartment was going to be lonely.

Appetizers were sat down. Seungho saw that Taekwoon wasn't keen on conversation, so decided to go at it himself.

"So I never asked," he began carefully, "how was the party? Did you have fun?"

Taekwoon blinked owlishly at him and looked down at his place, moving the food around. Only little butterflies with wet wings tickled his stomach. "It was okay." he muttered.

"Yeah?" Seungho replied earnestly, clearly trying to lift the mood. "Did you give those kids you presents? I can't remember, what did you get them?"

Momentarily distracted, Taekwoon thought about the presents he bought—Hongbin, a polaroid camera; Hyuk, a model building kit of a three-mast ship and a few anime figurines; Yongguk, a gift basket of teas which came with their own tiny pots to boil in; those three were pretty easy since he sort of had an idea about what they liked, but Ken and . . . Ravi . . .

He explained what he got them, most of his words blending in both his brain and mumble, but Seungho seemed satisfied.

"What about Jongdae and Hakyeon?" he asked.

Taekwoon froze, chopsticks in midair.

He hadn't talked to Hakyeon since that day in the cafe, and mysteriously after that, he never heard from Jongdae either. It was weird that their friends had been so enthusiastic about meeting Yixing, yet only Hakyeon and Jongdae had. His stomach sank with sudden apprehension; he wasn't even sure what to expect when school started up again.

His demeanor changed and he began to pick at his food more.

Seungho sighed, a good-natured smile on lips. "I'm sure you'll make up with them."

Taekwoon looked at him with wider eyes and watched him eat. Sure, he could say that easily, but . . . He sighed. His stomach growled and he looked back down at his food.

If Yixing believed in him and Seungho did too, then . . . He sighed too, and then began to eat.