It was monday morning and I agonized myself to the seeking office for the unemployed. Since I was fired three months ago from the club I danced in, because they found out about my relationship with my girlfriend. EX-girlfriend. She thought it'd better for me and for my job when she left. But I was fired anyway.

It was a rainy morning when I went to the office. Water oozed through my hair and fell on my face. It could be tears, but I cried too much in the last months, so there were no tears left. Only the pain and the nightmares that came every night. I was alone.

I left China and my whole family 5 years ago. I never had real friends over here in Korea. Not even in China. I'm really a shy. Even my exgirlfriend was the first one who accosted me first. She confessed to me first. I heared a lot that I'm a boy that lives in his own world.

 

So I didn't noticed the wispering first, but then I heard so clearly that I frightened. There was a boy standing in the corner between two houses. He weared a grey jacket; the hood over his head. He was a bit smaller than me and I guess he was younger than me.

"Come over here!", the boy said. I looked around, but went over to him. "What's your name?", the boy in the grey jacket said. "Yixing", I answered. "Zhang Yixing!" - "You aren't from here right?" - "No, I'm from China." - "How long?" - "What?" - "How long have you been here?" - "Why want you to know that?" - "I just asked. Follow me!"

He turned around and left me standing in the rain. I stood there a bit dumbfounded. Should I follow him. My appointment was in a few minutes.

The guy looked over his shoulder: "Aren't you comming?!" I looked around again. For me all of that was all a bit scary. I shruged with my shoulders and ran after him.

"What's your name?!", the guy asked. That's weird. Didn't he already asked me that question. "Yixing! But I thought I already told you that..."

"Maybe..." the weird guy shrugged with his shoulders. "By the way my name is Jongdae, but you can call me Chen."

"Where are we going?!", I asked, but all he said was: "Wait and see!"

 

We walked for about 2 minutes through the high buildings and it was getting darker. Finally we reached a door. He pulled it open and we entered a small room.

"So... How many do you want to buy?", he asked me.

"Pardon?" Why would I buy something? From him? And WHAT?! What should I buy?

"I guess you're a bit slow... I ask you again! How. Many. Do. You. Buy?!"

In the dimm light I could see his eyes. They were black. His pupills unusually wide. Was he on drugs?

"What do you have to sell?", I asked him suspiciously.

"Are you kidding me?", he chuckled. "Or have you really no idea?"

"Guess so...", I said.

"Oh... So you're a newby!" , he said ashtonished. "What was your name again?"

"Yixing!", I sighed for the third time telling him.

"Right! Right..." he mumbled while he went to a cupboard. He was standing with his back towards me. Now was the perfect time to escape, but I must confess that curiosity grabbed me.

"Well...", he began when he came back with small packages. "Here we have the classic. You can inhale or inject it."

He haded me a very small plastic bag with a white pulver. I guess it was heroine.

Than he handed me a small glass bottle. There were pills in it and on it's cover it read Amphetamin.

"If you don't want to swallow it you can break the capsel and inhale it. So it has a faster effect! It lasts pretty long."

I judged the bottle and the guy called Chen noticed that so he gave me a paper with weird pictures on it. On one there were three elephant heads with black holes as their eyes and on another the were two mice posing like models. The pictures were funny, but scary at the same time.

"LSD!", I heard Chen saying. "You have to it. The drug is painted on it. It has a funny effect, but afterwards it's quite scarry..."

Like the pictures, I thought.

I handed the paper back when I noticed a plasic bag with white to blue crystals in it. "What is this?"

"Ice!", he answered. I had to chuckle, because the look of these crystals was quite... fitting.

Next he handed me a package of colourful tablets. "I think this will suit you!"

"Oh please...", I groaned. "I'm not a kid!" We both laughed.

 

"But I have a question...", I finally asked.

"Yes?!" He looked at me still with tears in his eyes from laughing too hard.

"Why do you do this?"

"I- I don't know" He shrugged with his shoulders and put his brow. "I guess beacuse of the money..."

"But you don't get rich from this, aren't you?"

"No" He sighed and sat down. "I really don't know! My boyfriend died and I didn't know any way to live. I just wanted to end my live so bad. Instead I'm dealing drugs now! What has become of me?!"

"What was the name of your boyfriend?", I asked sitting beside him. I knew this feeling, but how hard must it be to loose your love forever?!

"Junmyeon...", he said. His voice was trembling. "He died in a car accident! We argued, because of his money. He was nice. You know- kind of caring!"

"I'm pretty sure he is watching over you!", I rubbed his shoulders.

 

"So when you never did drugs..." Chen asked me after a while looking at me with his teary eyes. "Why have you followed me?"

"Erm- I don't know... either!", I stammered.

I smiled at him, but he looked at me with penetrable eyes. I sighed. "I lost my job and my girlfriend left me. I was fired, because my boss found out about our relationship. He thought it was better for his buissnes."

"Where did you work?"

"In the EXO Club, downtown!"

"Oh- I know it!", he smiled at me. "Do you know Kai? I think he's working there too..."

"Kai? Yes, he was my best friend there. He even tried to change Kris' mind!", I looked down. "But I was fired anyway... How do you know him?"

"He is an customer of mine..."

"Jongin takes drugs?!", I nearly screamed at him. Looking at him with big eyes. That was surprising!

"You didn't know?", he looks at me, surprised too.

"No. I never noticed that!"

"Well.. He told me that he is pretty awkward with it and that he wants nobody to know!", Chen said to me.

"I see!", I mubled.

 

Then I stood up. "What was this Ice thing again? How much does it cost?"

Chen jumped up. "Are you kidding me? Why of all this sudden?"

"It makes me happy right?"

He nodded slowly.

"Fine than it take it! Erm- How?"

"What?!", he asked

"H-How do I take it?", I stammeled awkwardly.

"Wait!" Chen took the package and pulled out one of the crystals. Then he took an syringe and went over to the faucet. He put the crystal into the the syringe and closed it. Then he filled a cup with water.

"Pump your hand! It will be more easier when you do this...", he called over his shoulder.

I started pumping my left hand like at the doctors. Chen shaked the syringe for a while then he came back with the dissolved agents.

"So this is Ice... Well... The base is Ice. You may know it as Meth- or Crystal Meth..."

He handed me the syringe. "Inject it on the back of your hand. Like you know it from doctors..."

I put it down there. I was totally aware of what I am doing. The needle cut into my flesh.

"Crystal...", I mumbled. Then I closed my eyes and pushed the liquid into my body.

 

 

 

---

 

 

 

Hey guys, sorry for the waiting, but this took me a while.

I hope you enjoyed the first chapter.

I don't know when I will write/upload the second, because I won't post periodically...