Jongin expected to just sleep in on Saturday morning, but then Sehun called. He asked to meet somewhere and hang out saying he wouldn't want Jongin to think he forgot about him when he has a girlfriend.

Yeah, right.

It's actually Jongin who wants to forget about Sehun... so that it's less painful to feel something toward Eun-gi.

"Jongin ah~" Sehun waves as soon as the mentioned name arrives at the door.

"Sehun ah," Jongin smiles as he sits down. "How are you?"

"Never been better. Yah~ you look so good with that hair color! Just dyed?"

Jongin hesitates a bit. He never does anything to the color of his hair. And he doesn't want to correct his friend about it since he knows Sehun always has this small problem about distinguishing some colors. Some people know it as colorblind, but Sehun hasn't come to that kind of serious yet. His condition only happens once in a while.

"You like it?" Sehun nods a bit.

"Titanium blond suits you so well."

Jongin nods slowly. So Sehun's eyes define black as blond today. How far from being similar~

"But why do you want to see me today?"

"Why? You don't want to see me?"

"Nah, it's just that you're supposed to be with Eun-gi—" Jongin realizes he has blurted out her name out of nowhere again. "...or doing something with that basketball club you're in." he adds and chuckles drily.

"Eun-gi is going shopping with her mom today."

"Shopping? Thought she hates it."

"Her mom insisted that her two daughters should wear something similar to the new neighbor's housewarming party." Sehun sips on his drink.

"You mean Eun-gi and Eun-kyeong go shopping together? Gosh, pray it wouldn't be a disaster." Jongin's comment causes Sehun to laugh.

"I always envy you, you know Jongin?"

"About what?"

"You know Eun-gi since little. You have made a lot of memories together."

‘No. I envy you, Sehun.’ Jongin bites his lips as he thinks.

Sehun continues, "You've seen her crying when the morning cartoon ended before she woke up, you've seen her falling down while trying to learn how to bike, you've walked beside her, run under the rain with her, or maybe even had a race to the ice cream van." he smiles. Jongin's heart aches a bit. "I want to experience all of those things with her too."

"You're her boyfriend now. You can do all of those with her."

"There are things you can't replace, buddy. And one of those things is childhood memories. You are her best friend and I cannot replace that." Sehun smiles again and Jongin's heart aches a little more.

"What are you trying to say?"

"Thank you for always being there. For me, and her. Thank you, Jongin ah. Seeing her happy, knowing that she has you when I'm not around, my heart is at rest. I love her pure heart and sincere smile, it shows me that she has always been happy in her life. And that makes me happy as well."

"…" Jongin chooses to stay quiet. He just realized how selfish he has been acting — or attempted to — for the past weeks. He even forgets that Sehun is also his best friend and his happiness does matter too.

The idea of hating Sehun for dating Eun-gi is making Jongin guilty. Sehun is a good boy, he's caring and he's sweet. He loves to take care of people and he's never once acted different even though he is practically a sport star in their school. He's honest and forgiving and that's what Eun-gi loves in boys — that's what Jongin lacks.

After hearing Sehun's words about how Eun-gi being happy makes him happy, Jongin realized another thing which is the fact that Sehun doesn't love Eun-gi any less than him. Instead, he seems to love her more and not afraid to tell her.

And that's the problem.

Jongin was being a coward.