“One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four…” Hansol was mouthing the counting as he was practicing on a new choreography he built by himself, memorizing every motion he is coming up with and repeating it endlessly. For the first time in a while, Hansol felt good today. He woke up to the sounds of birds instead of the sound of noisy boys, and he decided to work some more and the dance he built, since most of his day had no schedule.
He really appriciated his alone times. Although he was outgoing and an enjoyable person to be with, those times were his only chance to be with himself and think.

“Yah! Hansol-ah! We’re going for lunch! Do you want to come with us?” Hojoon entered the practice, looking at the boy who just turned the music off.
“Nae hyung! I’ll be down in a minute!” He said with a grin and started to organize his stuff as Hojoon left the room, cramming everything on the table into his backpack.
The moment he exited the practice room and turned right, he saw him. His steps slowed, eyes locked at Gohn’s profile, who was talking to someone Hansol didn’t bothered to recognize. Here it is, that eye-smile again… That messy hair that falls right above his eyes, that perfect jawline and those lips… Gohn turned his head towards the small boy grinning, as Hansol just stared at the ground, picking up his pace so he won’t be able to notice the red shade that was spreaded across his face.
He never wanted to feel that towards him. Hansol hated that butterflies feeling that washed his body every time he had to stay near Gohn, which was hard enough as if he spent every minute of the day with him, even sleeping at the same room. Not only he had to hide it from Gohn and the others, he wanted to hide it from himself.
‘Stop looking at him’ ‘He is not that atractive’ ‘You don’t love him’ ‘ignore it, suppress it’ was all he could think each time there glances met, earning another pleasant itch in his heart.

“Are you coming with us, Hansol?” He heard the voice he hoped he won’t hear, just as the butterflies in his stomach started to bustle inside. “Are you okay?”
“Y-Yes hyung… I’m just a little tired…”
“Your face are so red, Are you sick?”
“No I’m fine… I-I need to go.”
“Wait Hansol, Have you seen my phone? I think someone took it.”
“No I haven’t.”
“Are you sure?”
“I told you that I didn’t!” Gohn took a step back as the boy shrieked.
“Why are you so  upset?”
“I’m not…” He stared at the ground again. Why is he so pathetic? Acting like a little girl around her crush, hoping that one day he might realize - but he didn’t want him to realize. He hated those emotions and wanted them to be gone, they oppressed him more than he think they could - controlling his mind and words, making his heart ache as much as Gohn’s stare was soft and welcoming.
“I’m dialing again.” The other man announced, pressing his metallic gadget to his ear. A buzzing sound came from Hansol’s backpack. It can’t be, his own phone is inside his left pocket! What the hell!
Hansol let down that strap of his shoulder, opening the the biggest trunk while Gohn followed his actions with knitted eyebrows, pretty much confused. Hansol entered a shaky hand into it, pulling out slowly the buzzing instrument that now they all recognized as the older’s phone.
“Did you took my phone?” Gohn lifted his stare to look into Hansol’s eyes, who was trying to avoid any eye contact with him.
“I didn’t…”
“Then what it’s doing in your bag?!” He stepped few steps towards the boy, raising his voice. A phone can be a very sensitive thing to deal with these days, none of the less they are all idols now.
“I don’t know… Please don’t step closer.” Hansol panted, backing away as he tried to hide the blush as well as his confusion.
“What were you planning to do with it?!” Another step.
“I didn’t take it I tell you!” Hansol was kept backing away, not looking backwards.
“Then it just popped in your bag?!”
“Why are you so mad..?”
“‘Cause you stole it!”
“I didn’t sti-”

Everything was happening too fast. His words were cut off by a weird blank feeling of the lack of floor under his feet, his whole body reacting to it as his back leaned back on the empty air, slamming against the stepped floor of the stairway, each angle of his body was twitching against the rough impact of his right hand.
Without him to noticed he finally reached the solid floor, falling right on his already harmed hand and wrist, mouth open with groans leaving it as the pain started to take over. Hansol grabbed onto his right hand and pressed it to his chest, rolling on his back as his teeth grinded and his tearing eyes was now closed tight. He could hear voices chanting his name loudly, and he looked around - his vision blurred as all the colors started to mix together with the threatening darkness while the pain blend with the unconsciousness that took over his sore body.

<><><><><>

The dark murk that shrouded Hansol’s head up till now, was starting to fog away. Soon the pain started to recreate at his wrist, instinctively grabbing it and pressing it again to his chest, not even noticing he have been removed to a couch after he out.
“Don’t move, it will just hurt more.” Hansol heard Xero next to him as well as the touch of his hand on the back his left hand that was holding onto his injured one. He opened his eyes, observing the people who were in the room with him - Xero was there as well as B-joo, P-goon, Sangdo and… And Gohn.
“How bad is it?” Sangdo asked.
“Very much… I can’t feel my fingers…”
“I think he broke it, I’ll call the manager and we’ll take to the hospital.” The leader said, pulling out his phone and dialing.  Hansol was about to get off the couch as he sensed Xero’s and B-joo’s presence next to him.
“Can you stand? You hit the floor really hard.” B-joo asked.
“I’m fine… It’s just my hand and a headache.” Hansol responded, getting up on his two legs, his hand still pressed against his chest, biting his lips in attempt to distract himself from the throbbing pain.
“Hansol…” He heard his voice again. The last and first voice he wanted to hear right now. “I’m sorry…”
“Don’t touch me.” Hansol demanded as Gohn stretched his hand towards him. He wasn’t sure what to feel at the moment. Does it count as betrayal? It’s not like they were together or something, or even in mutual love. It was just a war between his weird tingling feeling and his physical pain - mind against body. As if he was sure only his hand had been harmed, he stepped his first steps to the door and his head started to blur again, making him lean on the wall for support, preventing his body to collapse onto the floor while he panted with his eyes closed.
“You can’t even walk..!” Xero grabbed onto his hyung, holding him by the waist as he led him out of the room, directing to the car that was now waiting outside.
“This is your fault…” Hansol whispered to himself although it was aimed to Gohn, that kept standing in the room with his lips parted in concern. Like waking up from a dream, Gohn shook his head and rushed out of the room as well, insisting on going with Hansol and the manager to the hospital.

<><><><><>

“It is not a severe injury, but his wrist broke in 2 places.  You also got a minor concussion. In few minutes I will return to cast plaster over it. For now just rest.” The doctor told Hansol that set on the pure white bed, his hand’s x-ray pictures are laid in front of him.
“I need to make some phone calls, I’ll be right back.” The manager left as well, leaving the boy alone with the man he should hate the most right now, though he doesn’t. He want to, but he can’t.
“I-It wasn’t intentional, Hansol-ah…” Gohn started talking, standing straight in front of the hurt boy.
“Just don’t talk to me right now, okay?”
“Please forgive me, I’m sorry I don’t know why I even-”
“I don’t care how much you’d apologize… I hate you.” He lied to him, and to himself.
His words echoed in Gohn’s head, getting lost to the feeling of a punch that knocks him out. He kept staring at the gloomy boy until the doctor came on with his plastering tools, taking a hold of Hansol’s hand and straightening it.

Gohn left the room, passing by their manager and telling him he’ll meet them outside. Now that the man was out Hansol's sight he could now think properly, now remembering he is the ing main dancer of their group, remembering how many moves that included his right hand was in the choreography he built, remembering that he is a right handed, remembering Gohn’s face right before he fell on the stairs… No! He shouldn’t be thinking about him right now, or ever. He broke his hands, he made him fall of the stairs, he yelled at him, he accused him of stealing, he made him temporarily an inessential dancer - He should hate him, he should scold him and he should forget about those aching feelings, but instead he is picturing the scene over and over again, letting Gohn’s image fill up his mind.

<><><><><>

The travel back to the dorms was long and agonizing. Hansol was sitting at the front and Gohn at the back, looking down on his lap and playing with his fingers. Hansol stared at him through the mirror that was hung above, letting his eyes explore his parts. ‘Hate him, do it, you should! He deserves it!’ his brain screamed inside.
Both of them entered silently to their dorm, looking around for few seconds and realizing no one is there, probably left for eating or hanging out. It was just 5:00 p.m., they should be back in few hours, more or less.
Hansol throws himself onto Nakta’s bed, too tired and self-pitying to climb over to his own. He rolled on his back and lifted his right arm, examining the green plaster that now covered his palm, wrist and most of his arm. With his sigh, Gohn entered the room as well, sitting on the opposite bed he owned.
“What do you want?” Hansol glanced over, but didn’t look directly at him, afraid that the feelings of his might burst again without a warning.
“Please don’t hate me.” That all could Gohn mumble. “I don’t want you to hate me.”
“I’m trying really hard not to.” A lie. Gohn kept staring at the boy for a while, searching any other emotion on Hansol’s face except of pain - pain that was coming from his arm, and a pain that was coming from his heart, both of them hurt equally.
“You know I didn’t do that on purpose.”
“It doesn’t change the fact that I’m pretty much stuck with this thing for a month. I just finished the choreography and now I won’t be able to practice on it for a month. A month!” Hansol sat up, now looking right into his anxious hyung’s eyes, butterflies everywhere - bustling in a rhythm to his fast heartbeats. “Think about yourself not being able to sing for a month.”
“The doctor said you can dance anyway as long as it doesn’t includes any use of your right arm.”
“Which is practically ninety percent of our dances.”

Gohn just gulped and stared back at the floor, looking for anything to distract him. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Hansol. It was already hard for him to admit, but he cared about him, he… liked him. Probably more than just that. But Hansol used to be so remoted, ignoring him everytime he approached, covering his face from him and escaping conversations with him.
The thought of Hansol hating his ached for a while. Now he knows he screwed up too badly this time, and he can’t do anything to make it up to him - realizing how he missed his mischievous smile, his witch-like giggle and his bouncing happy body. They were all gone by now.
He noticed Hansol was trying to reach with his fingers under the plaster, twitching his lips in attempt to find the right angle to reach the itch. Gohn got up from his bed, returning from the kitchen with a fork.
“Try this.” He handed him it, standing above the bed and looking down at the sore boy. Hansol took the metallic fork with a shaky hand, making sure not to make any contact with Gohn’s.
“Thank you…” He mumbled, staring up at him.
“I’m… I’m sorry, Hansol.” Gohn wasn’t going to give up, not until the little man will admit he doesn’t hate him anymore.
“I already told that you can apologize as much as-”
“-I’d like, but you still hate me.” He completed his sentence. He sat down next to him, furrowing his eyebrows as Hansol looked to other side, trying to neglect to older. “But I don’t hate you.”
“Well, you have no reason to.”
“You don’t understand… I-I don’t hate you, I… Am not really sure what I feel towards you.” Gohn breathed out, his words making Hansol to look back at him.
“Wh-What are you talking about..?”
“I’m not sure myself but… Now all this deal with your hand and the fact that it was my fault… I can’t take it, I can’t bare the thought that you hate me.” Gohn ran his hand over Hansol’s green plaster, making a chill go through his spine, spreading all over his body. Hansol gulped, not making a move.
“I don’t know why I got so mad…” He kept talking. “It’s just a phone, right?”
“You should have said that earlier, don’t you think?”
“I feel so guilty, please Hansol, there must be something I can do to make you lo- I mean, not hate me.”
‘kiss me, hug me, tell me you love me back’ that all his brain could scream at the moment. ‘This is not the time to be a coward, Hansol!’ The brain was restless. ‘It is your chance, he owes you this!’
“N-No…” Hansol was answering himself, but Gohn figured it was directed to him. He looked at the boy with an anxious glare, trying to make an eye contact. It was too painful to deal with. Too aching that the man he have been craving to be with for a while hates for such a stupid and reckless mistake, an accident.

He was about to get off the bed as a solid hand pulled down on his sleeve, making him sit back. While Gohn looked over Hansol with a confused look, the other’s left hand grabbed onto the back of his neck, forcing him to lean over - and their lips met. Hansol didn’t know what to be more surprised of - his actions, or how soft Gohn’s lips were, more than he imagined through those painful months.
Neither of them pulled away. It was too magical and too delayed to stop in the middle. Their lips started to move simultaneously, fighting each other’s mouths to get dominance. Gohn won by slipping his tongue over the younger’s earning a gasp from him. Gohn lifted his hand to cup Hansol cheeks, and pulled away immediately when he felt the stripes of water that dripped off his eyes.
Hansol wasn’t sure why was he crying. From the physical pain, from the fact that the moment he craved the most finally came or because he once thought that Gohn couldn’t return him the same feelings.
“I don’t hate you, Gohn…” Hansol said as he shed another tear. “I can’t.”
This is all Gohn needed to hear to allow himself back on the other’s lips, brushing his thumb over his tender cheeks.
“I would never hurt you… Not in a million years…”
“Let’s just… stay like this for a while. I don’t care anymore.” Hansol murmured as he melted into Gohn’s embrace, letting his heartbeats doze him into a sweet sleep.

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A/N I still didn’t edit it so there are some mistakes somewhere, I’ll edit it in few hours :) Hope you liked it ^^

A/N Now it is after the edit ^^ Please tell me if there are any mistakes.