excuse me my bad english before ^^

 

 

¯La Douleur Exquise¯

"A heart wreching pain knowing you can't love someone"

 

 

 

Like any other day, he walks to school library with his phone playing his music on shuffle. As he reaches the library, he looks inside the library, and he found a girl sitting and writing something in her notebook. He smiles and walks over to the girl. 

 

“Hey, let's go home.” He pokes the girl's shoulder.

“Oh? Baekhyun? Are you done already? I’m still trying to find out about this thing..” The girl replied.

“What thing?” Baekhyun takes a seat beside that girl, looking what this girl found interesting.

“Supernatural thing. Do you believe you will become angel?”

“I’m not really sure about it. Why?” He asks. 

“I’ll read this part, and you, listen carefully.” She replies. Baekhyun nodded.

 

I know lot of people is teasing me because I’m an angel.

An angel without wings.

I fall in love with you, I wanna be with you.

But, I have to lose my wings.

Am I wrong, to love you?

Am I wrong to get loved again?

I come to you, to love you.

I never regret I lose my wings for you.

My first, my last love.

 

 

 “See? Its beautiful.” She smiled.

“Yes. Now let's go home, Bomi. I’m hungry!” She giggled then nodded

“Lets go then!”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

“Ahhh! I’m full! Thanks for the dinner, Bomi. Your food tasted great tonight !” Baekhyun said enthusiastically. 

“Are you trying to tell me that I’m not good at cooking before this?” Bomi asked with an attitude. 

“Ah, Oh no.. No No.. Haha..” He took his words back.

“You should go home. It's getting late.” Bomi said while taking the dishes.

“What are you talking about? It's only 7 pm Bomi-ya!” Baekhyun argued. 

“This is a girl's house, Byun Baekhyun. Go home.”

“Fine, fine. Okay I’ll go now. Remember, I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 6.30 am, okay? I need some practice before the soccer match.”

“Yes. I got it.”

“Good girl. Lock the apartement okay?”

“Yes, Mr. Byun.” Bomi answered lazily.

“Okay then, bye.”

“Bye.”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Hear the birds sings in morning, is just like daily alarm for Bomi. She took a towel and got ready for school. 

She put on the school uniform, and she can't forget to apply light face powder. Exactly at the promised time, Baekhyun came to pick up Bomi.

“Bomi-ya! Are you ready to watch my soccer match?” Baekhyun asked happily. She nodded.

“Then lets go! I don’t wanna be late for my match!” Bomi followed Baekhyun step until they reached the basement, where Baekhyun car’s was parked. 

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

“What are you reading, Bomi?” Bomi’s best friend, Naeun asked.

“Etoilé.”

“What is that? You're always reading something new.”

“This is not something new.” Bomi smiled. “I used to read Baekhyun’s hope in this book.”

“Ah, I see. So you will do something with this book?” Bomi nodded. “Yes.”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Baekhyun’s phone chimes, and there's one text message waiting for him.

 

From: Bomi

Open your bag. There’s handband, a gift from me.

I hope you use it for your match!

All the best of luck.

-Bomi

 

Baekhyun opened his bag, found the thing Bomi mentioned.

He notice something that Bomi write for him, one sentence.

Fearless.

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

“Bomi, will you join us today?” Naeun asked. 

“Huh? Join what?”

“The part of course. Baekhyun's team won!” Eunji answered.

“Oh? I don't think so, haha. I need to returned this book to library. See you soon!” Bomi greeted, waving as she left to the library.

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

She took a taxi to go home. Bomi paid for the taxi trip and unlocked her apartement.

Enter pass code:

The apartement’s door opened.

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Her phones vibrated.

 

Byun Baekhyun is calling you.

Ignore               ||        Answer

 

Bomi smiled and tap the answer button.

“Annyeong..”

“Bomi-ya, you didn't even come to my soccer match!” Baekhyun yelled.

“I thought, handband is enough.” Bomi answered it while drying her hair.

“I don’t need the handband, I need you..” Baekhyun lowered his voice, it sounded really soft.

“Hahaha, I’m sorry Baekhyun-ah.” She replied quietly. 

“It's night, go to sleep Bomi-ya. And... I need to tell you something." Baekhyun says. There's a sad tone in his voice. 

"What is it, Baekhyun?" Bomi asks. 

There's silence over the phone, and he speaks quietly. "I think it's time to break up." 

Bomi's about to cry. "Why...?" She asked. 

"I like Naeun now," Baekhyun ends the conversation and hangs up the phone. 

It's hard for Bomi to accept the fact that Baekhyun broke up with her. She breaks down in tears the rest of the night, crying to sleep. 

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Bomi stepped the library and chose a music book. With an iPod on her hand, she played a song instrumental she arranged before, and started searching for the lyrics.

“Bomi-ya..” A guy walk to her, looking sad.

“Lu-Luhan oppa?”

“You know the headache you told me before?  I need talk to you about it.”

“Ok-Okay..”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

“Bomi. Yoon Bomi.” The voice that really similliar at Bomi’s ear, caught her attention.

“Ah? Baekhyun? What's up?" She asked. Bomi had to stay strong. 

“I'm really sorry for last night..." Baekhyun says apologetically. Bomi shakes her head. 

“It's ok. Make Naeun smile, as always.” Bomi answered. She show sad smile but Baekhyun didn’t notice it.

“Okay! I promise!”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Baekhyun walk passed the music room, hearing someone singing.

 

You, who I struggled to understand

In the place where we were together

In the moment where I resembled you

When it felt too good being soaked in the rain

You are gone, gone

 

How am I supposed to erase you alone and live

In those moments where we once walked together

Like that, the things we made beside each other

Even the memories, even those regrets

 

In the place where we were together

In those moments where we could’ve walked together

I’m holding onto myself alone

In this place, even our future, my wishes have stopped

I’m standing here and you are gone

 

He peeked into the room.

Its Bomi.

He saw Bomi ate something. Is it vitamin?

 

“Bomi..?”

She look so surprised, then opened the door.

“eum, what are you doing here, alone?” Baekhyun trying to be comfortable.

“Nothing. Just trying my song.” Bomi say. “What are you doing here, Baekhyun-ssi?”

 

Baekhyun start realizing something wrong with her.

Her face, isn’t like usual.

Its pale.

 

“Just soccer practice. Anyway, are  you sick? You look pale.”

“Ah. No haha. I’m not sick.” She smiled.

“Don’t lie. I saw you ate some medicine.” Baekhyun argued.

“Its only for cold, don’t worry.” She answered. “How about Naeun? When you guys start dating?”

“Maybe tomorrow? I’ll already asked her to go out.”

“Good then. I need to go now, Luhan oppa is waiting for me.” Bomi left Baekhyun behind.

 

Baekhyun sit in front of the piano. When he is gonna start playing the piano, his chair unaccidentally hit something.

“What is this?”

“this is Bomi's right? But the tube is empty.”

He think that is only empty medicine tube.

Baekhyun left the music room with the empty medicine.

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Baekhyun house is near Bomi house. When he’s open the car door,Bomi come to him.

 

“Can I go to school with you?” Bomi asked. 

“I’m sorry. I can’t. I promise Naeun to pick up her right now.” Baekhyun refused.

“But can I ask you one last favor before you leave?”

“Sure. Why not?”

“Later, I’m gonna leaving this country so, I'm leaving behind a note book I always bring wherever I go. Read it. Eunji gonna delivery it to you.” Bomi smiled. “Thank you, Byun Baekhyun..”

“Yeah. Welcome..” Baekhyun left Bomi’s apartement as soon as he could. He didn't sound to appealed. 

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

1 week later

“Baekhyun-ssi! Bomi asked me to deliver this to you!” Eunji said while giving the soft ocean blue note book to Baekhyun.

“Ah yes. Thank you! Anyway, have you seen Naeun?” Eunji looked so surprised.

“You don’t know?”

“What?”

“Naeun is dating Nickhun.”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Baekhyun walked to his apartement, and enter his room.

He really regretted breaking up with Bomi, since Baekhyun would've never believed  his relationship with Naeun would end up like this.

Baekhyun was really just trying to fool himself that he never loved Bomi from the start. 

“Bomi, I still love you..."

“Should I come to her apartment?” Baekhyun asked to no one in particular. 

“Yeah I should.”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

Baekhyun's at Bomi's apartment. 

 

“Bomi-ya! Bomi-ya! Yoon Bomi!” Because there was no one answering it, Baekhyun keeps ringing the door bell.

“Yes?” Suddenly a guy appears in front of Baekhyun. Baekhyun knows exactly who is that guy.

“Luhan hyung, where’s Bomi?” Baekhyun inquires, getting straight to the point. 

“Bomi isn’t here anymore...” Luhan's voice died off at the end of the sentence. 

“Where’s Bomi?”

“She.. She.. Come in, Baekhyun-ah.” Luhan invites Baekhyun inside. At the center of the room, there's a table with a flower bouquet and Bomi’s photo in front of the bouquet.

“What... What do you mean by this? Don’t tell me..” Baekhyun's words gets cut off by Luhan. “Yes she is. She is dead."

“What- How- How could that happen?”

“Here, sit down beside me, let me explain all of this.” Luhan says while taking out a brown mat. "Sit."

“Bomi had brain cancer. I’m sure you saw her taking some medicine, right?” Baekhyun nodded.

“It's pain killer. When I got this from hospital, it said she only had 10 days to live. And you broke up with her when she got this information. She took lot of her time to write in that notebook. I’m sure you have received the notebook. She wrote all her feelings for you. And the last song she composed, remember? You can see all of the lyrics, written in her notebook. She wrote it all. And she asked me to not tell you that she has brain cancer. She doesn't want you to be sad when you know the fact she's leaving, forever.” Luhan said. Between the two of them it was silence for minutes. But Baekhyun spoke up first. 

“Can I come visit her grave tomorrow?”

“Sure. I’ll drive you there. Let's meet at 8 in the morning, at your apartment.”

“Thank you, Luhan hyung. I will go now. Thank you for the all information.” Baekhyun stood up and left Bomi’s apartement.

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

All Baekhyun wanted right now was the fact Bomi’s died is only a dream. That none of this was real. But it's reality, and he had to face the truth. Now, he stands in front of Bomi’s grave. He put a white lily. He remembers, his girl loves white lily.

“Bomi-ya, I’m sorry. I read all of your notes yesterday. I really regretted leaving you all alone before you died. Remember please all the memories we shared together, between you and me. I’ll keep yours forever, here. In my heart.”

 

•La Douleur Exquise•

 

To; Baekhyun

Thankyou for everything, Baekhyun.

You are the first person that stole my first love.

You are my first and last love.

Like what that book said, if I were angel, then I didn’t regret I lost my wings to be with you, but my wings didn’t comeback even I already broke up with you its all because I still love you.

There’s a day that we can’t be together again, please, don’t forget me, I’ll never forget you.

You’ll never be replaced in my heart, forever.

I love you, Byun Baekhyun.

 

Your ex girlfriend,

Yoon Bomi.