Namjoon awoke once more with sweat dripping from his skin, tears stinging his eyes as he reenacted his nightmare in his mind. The recurring nightmare that has been going around in his head for almost two years now. The anniversary of his boyfriend's death was arising, and he knew that this was going to be the last time he would be able to be strong like he'd told himself the other times before. 

He decided to take a walk, despite the fact it was still pitch black on the streets. He pulled on a thick jacket and wrapped a scarf around his face. Even though he knew that no one would be out and about at three a.m. he was still cautious, he didn't want to give anybody else nightmares. 

The thing about Namjoon is, he wasn't like others. He liked to hide himself, his face and body. Because, there was a time when he didn't feel self-conscious. He'd been referred to as a monster, they hadn't understood at all. They were children, but it still cut him up inside.

But monsters love too, he had loved.

He'd been walking along the street hurriedly, head down and earphones in to block out the world around him. It wasn't until he walked straight into a small man that he was dragged out of his dream world. His mouth slung open to apologise but his words were caught in his throat. The man was blind, white, lifeless eyes looking around for his stick in hopes he would find it. His porcelain skin shone in the bright sun and his ink black hair accented it perfectly. He looked like a doll, Namjoon noticed. He quickly picked up the stick and handed it to the smaller man, smiling despite the other couldn't see it. "Here you go." Namjoon had spoken clearly, the man snapping his head around to the origin of the noise and taking his stick gratefully, his smile looked like it belonged to an angel. "Would you... would you like me to help you home, sir? It's the least I could do after knocking into you like that." The man hummed in thought before he nodded. "I'd like that." He shyly whispered. Namjoon fell in love with his voice then and there. 

The man sighed and stepped out of his doorway. He knew what living in the past could do to him, but what else did he have? He pulled his scarf over his nose and walked into the bitter winter air. He took in his surroundings, though he knew the place like the back of his hand. How could he forget the place that he'd met the love of his life? The one love of his world. Glancing at the places that he'd shared times with the man he'd called his boyfriend. Stopping, he looked at a bench beside him. 

"Namjoon?" Yoongi called out from his position on the bench, smiling as he felt a sudden warmth standing in front of him. "Nammie, is that you?" His hands reached out thoughtlessly, catching on Namjoon's coat and making the younger laugh deeply. "Who else would it be?" He asked thoughtlessly. Yoongi just shrugged silently. He pulled the man down and cuddled into him on the bench. Even though they'd only met recently, the pair understood each other, they knew everything there was to know about each other. Apart from the crucial thing, Namjoon was a monster. The pair were both unusual. Traumatized beings. Namjoon told himself since he was a child that, no matter what, everyone will find that someone that understands them completely, that no matter how much of a monster someone is. They always have their guardian angel. Namjoon knew he had found his. 

The memories always flooded through Namjoon when he walked down the streets, but he refused to move. He wanted to remember. He deserved it, because if it wasn't for him then maybe Yoongi would still be wandering aimlessly on the streets, just like Namjoon was now. He felt like screaming, peeling the scarf of and throwing it onto the ground. He deserved the bad treatment because he was a monster. 

"Nobody is a monster, Nammie. We're just misunderstood." The blind man had smiled, his beauty radiating and making Namjoon smile back at him. "Maybe." He replied simply, taking Yoongi's hand and walking along with him. "Do you love me, Nammie?" He had asked quietly, making the younger stop in his tracks. "Of course I do, why? Is something wrong?" Yoongi had just shook his head. "So trust me. I... Maybe I don't know what you look like, and I can't see your perfections. But I can feel them." He'd blushed softly, reaching up onto his tiptoes and cupped Namjoon's face. He'd not noticed the scarf when he brushed his lips over Namjoon's covered ones.

Maybe it was for the best that Yoongi never got to kiss his lips in reality. Namjoon had always felt bad when they walked down the streets together and they'd recieved looks. There's that monster again. Who's that with him? Yoongi was his victim. He'd lied to him countless of times just to hide his physical defaults. Just to hide himself from the man he loved. He never failed to make himself feel pathetic. 

Namjoon stopped at the side of the road, smiling as he noticed the passing traffic. It was generally frequent, he looked down at his watch closely and sighed. Still another 12 minutes. He went over to the bench beside him, the bench were it had happened. Looking over, he saw the alleyway where his scars had been given. He was jumped, violently, by a group of thugs. Crossing his legs he watched his watch once more. Waiting, watching. 

"Nammie..." Yoongi had whispered that one winter afternoon. Tears clouded his empty eyes as he stared around, searching for Namjoon with his hands. They'd argued about something stupid, Namjoon noted, because Yoongi had found his scarf, felt it around his face. He was just curious, he wanted to know what his love was hiding. Namjoon had stormed off away from the beautiful, blind man. He had figured he would return later on and find him sitting there. That's not what he returned to. He returned to find ambulances surrounding the area, lights flashing in his eyes and sirens blaring. He searched for the blind man in the crowd before pushing to the front. 

There lay his love, body mangled and broken on the floor. He'd walked into oncoming traffic, and the impact was hard. Namjoon ran forward, screaming out Yoongi's name in a hope that he would just wake up, he'd be a little hurt but at the end of the day he'd be alive and safe in Namjoon's arms. The paramedics tried to pull him back, lifting Yoongi up into a body bag. To them he was just another accident. 

His watch struck the time accordingly, and he stood up, patiently awaiting the next vehicle to speed down the road. He smiled as it did so, stepping out in front of it and closing his eyes. The driver didn't have any time to stop, to even notice that the man had stepped into the road. The car hit him dead on, sending the man flying into the air and on passing it would have looked almost graceful. But then his body slumped to the ground in a mess of skin, limbs and blood. Dead on impact. The driver slammed down on the breaks, stepping out of the car before running over to the man to try and help him.

An ambulance was called, and another body bag was ordered. He watched himself from amongst the crowd, being raised into the ambulance and driven off at top speed, another accident. Turning, he saw his angel once again. Yoongi stood smiling at him, almost coaxing him over, he wasted no time in following him. 

He'd always follow him, because monsters love too.