It's been about a year now that Ruki has been gone.

Reita didn't really have the meanings to live really. He was on the verge of sanity. A very thin line held him into reality.

~

Ever since Ruki died, Reita rarely left home, he went back to smoking even if he quit once, the smell of the cigarette reminded him of his perfect lover. He wanted it to seem as if Ruki is still there with him. Reita sat in the dark of his room that he once shared with Ruki.

'Whats the meaning of life anymore?' Is all that crosses Reita's mind. Would things be different if Ruki was still here.... Why did Ruki have to die?

" Reita! Why do you always do this every ing day?! God you piss me off so much!"

Oh right. Ruki and Reita were never happy together. They were the complete opposite of happy. They always argued and say the harshest words to each other, it's probably because They've known each other for the longest time that they know the exact words to use against each other's will.

Reita felt the pain in his chest, his heart breaking more and more as each day passes, he knew Ruki never loved him. He knew Ruki was just using him. But Reita always loved Ruki. Ruki was his everything, his one true love... Reita felt the tears rushing to his eyes, he held them back as best as he could, but he knew he would just end up crying later, so he jut let them flow with loud sobs. He knows his neighbours can hear him through the thin walls, but Reita didn't give a single about them.

" Ruki... Why did you leave me..."

Without Ruki.... Reita was nothing. He became depressed each day, always wishing that Ruki would come back. Wishing that he'd come into the room with his smile each night. But Reita knew that'll never happen. Ruki's gone. Never to come back.

"Why Ruki.... Just why did you kill yourself?"

Reita desperately wanted to know the answer... But he will never know.

'Ruki. Just one last time. Please tell me you love me. Say 'I love you' please. I know you can hear me...'

Reita slowly cried himself to sleep again that night, wishing he had the small man in his arms to hold. Just once more.

~

The next day was the same like any other day. Reita woke, made breakfast and ate alone in complete quiet.

"I should maybe clean today. The house is really messy, Ruki would get really upset.."

Reita looked around at the trash, unwashed dishes, and clothes everywhere.

'Reita! Start cleaning! Look at this mess, after we're done we can go somewhere?'

Reita smiled at the memory of Ruki. Every good memory that they have had will always remain. The only things that Reita can't quite remember were the arguments and the long fights they've had, they were always blurry and Reita would end up getting a headache trying to remember.

"I miss you so much..." He whispered to himself, wishing ruki would be able to hear him.

Reita finished the dishes and started to sweep the floor, he found one of Ruki's old rings underneath the couch...

'Hey Ruki, I found the ring you lost....' Reita thought to himself and put the ring on. It was slightly too big for him now. it used to be able to fit him perfectly before...

Reita sat down on the couch and started to cry... His life was really broken down, even with the scars on his wrists, nothing seemed to numb the pain that his one true love was gone.

"Hey Reita! You know I love you right?"

Reita turned around, 'what? Did I just hear Ruki... No. I'm just going crazy. That's all, Ruki's gone, he wouldn't be here.' He lit a cigarette.

"Reita! You know I love you right?"

"Okay. Ruki is not here. Reita your officially crazy." Reita didn't know what he was thinking anymore, he knew Ruki was dead. He knew that he was going crazy.

He went to the bathroom, Reita didn't need to be here anymore right? His friends don't talk to him anymore. They stopped caring about him when Ruki died. Reita opened the cabinet door, grabbing the bottle. 

"I have no meanings to live anymore, right?" Reita looked down at the bottle... the bottle that is full of pills. "After I take these... I'll be with you again Ruki... Right?" 

'Reita! I love you.'

Reita turned around. No one there. 

"What the hell..." Reita shook his head, poured the pills into his hand, and brought them to his mouth.

"I love you Reita. please don't do this." Ruki's voice can be clearly heard behind Reita. 

"But... Your gone. I need you..." Reita turned around, and again, no one is there. Reita started to cry again, "I don't care anymore!" And with the pills in his mouth again,

Darkness took over.

~~

A/C: I wrote this out of boredom... so.. its not good okay XD

Please leave some feedback.... :3