chapter one.

death /deTH/ noun noun: death; plural noun: deaths 1. the action or fact of dying or being killed; the end of the life of a person or organism.    

Chorong POV:

The small sound of ticking filled the air as I walked into the church. Everyone had already left, back to their daily lives. Back to pretending he never existed. But in my heart, he always existed. The days and night were the same. Time stood still, Nothing mattered to me in life anymore. I couldn't breath. My heart had shattered into a billion pieces again and again and again. I couldn't deal with the pain. But I had to come. I had to see him again.

A train of black lace tailed behind me. A bouquet of flower held in my hand, the thorns pierced my skin but I didn't care. I sat alone in the fourth bench from the front. I stared at the picture in front of me and held it in my hand. Blue ribbon cover the top and the bottom on the frame. The picture was Myungsoo. I felt a sharp pain in my heart as I let a small gasp. I brushed my thumb against the picture, wishing I could feel him again.

The liquid sadness flowed down my paling soft cheeks, leaving a wet, black trail of makeup in the path. A single tear fell down from my chocolate colored eye, and another one. Until soon, a steady stream of salty tears flowed down my cheek, releasing the sadness and sorrow I held inside of me for all this time but I didn’t make a sound. My body shook and trembled as if I couldn’t control it. I struggled to breathe with each desperate gasp of air I took, only to release it again in another forceful sob. I held the picture toward my heart and bowed my head, now sobbing. I tried to be strong. I tried to be okay but in reality I wasn’t. Without him, I was never okay.

I would do anything to get him back.

I stared back at his picture, my sights still blurry from the tears. His black brown hair was tousled to one side. His hair was messy but it still looked neat; one of the reason why he took so long in the morning sometimes more than me. He always told me that he wanted to look good because he had to make sure I didn't have an ugly boyfriend but I always said he was the most handsome boyfriend on earth. I chuckled at that memory. His brown eyes twinkled just like he was when I cooked Kimchi stew for him. His smile wasn't like one of his L smiles. It was a Myungsoo smile. Gentle, Soft.

I felt my eyes stinging with tears. I couldn't take it. I ran out of the church, leaving the bouquet of roses bench. Tears fell to the ground as I pushed the church doors open. A boiling anger swelled up in me, burning my whole body until it was unbearable. I screamed and fell to the ground, dirt stained my black dress. The warmth in the my body just seeped out of me, leaving me cold and empty. I couldn't breath properly. My breath came out in small gasps. My heart pulsed erratically. The pounding of blood was deafening, drowning out everything in the world. I had no security in life.

I had no one.

After having my crying fit in the