“Chorong” She walked back in to the kitchen fiddling with her hands. I smiled lightly trying not to cause a big commotion.

                “I wrote that a while ago I thought you might like it.” I lied scratching the back of my neck. She looked at me with questioning eyes, but it almost seemed like there was disappointment. I blew out air, smiling awkwardly as my bangs fell back to their place. “So let’s go join the others?” I said tucking my hands in my pockets walking towards the others. Bomi grabbed my arm pulling me back into the kitchen, I sighed regretting even coming to the get together in the first place.

                “Are you positive?”

                “Why wouldn’t I be positive? Of course I wrote it.”

                “And you’re not lying about when right?” Bomi raised her eye brow pointing her finger at me. I chuckled grabbing her finger.

                “Not lying.” I let go of her finger, turning to leave the situation but yet again I felt her hand on my wrist.

                “Thanks.” I felt her lips make contact with my cheek. I nodded rushing out of the room, not knowing how to handle what had just happened. Bomi followed me into the room, but instead of sitting by me she went right for the pizza. I held my cheeks trying to make them stop heating up, although I doubt anything would work right now. Bomi looked up at me as she took a bite from her pizza, she must have found my embarrassment funny. I really couldn’t blame her for finding my pain funny; I did have strange ways of showing it. I smiled lightly as she continued to indulge in the pizza.

December really changed how we interacted, or I shouldn’t say we I think the change was more on me. I found myself wanting to be close but not knowing how to be which always ended up in some awkward moment. Bomi had started to go on dates, at first I was okay with that. But as the time moved I found myself caring less about the friendship and more about my feelings. I tried to tone down my boiling anger towards the naïve girl, nothing seemed to work. I always thought something was wrong with me, I mean who wouldn’t after being angry over something like that. Bomi noticed my behaviour and by January I noticed her drifting. My heart began to ache, even though I told myself over and over again the heart had nothing to do with these feelings. I was the one who decided to feel these ways; it was my head not the organ that keeps me alive.

~Return to February~

I looked up towards the sky as I headed towards the bus stop. I rolled my eyes as I popped my headphones into my ears, now reaching the stop. I felt someone tap my shoulder and I saw Bomi. I took a headphone out, looking at the girl confused.

                “What are you doing here?” She asked me as she awkwardly hung her bag over her shoulder.

                “oh, I have to take the bus to work.” I said monotonously, she opened nodding her head clearly feeling the awkward atmosphere.

                “So how have you been, we haven’t talked that much.” Bomi smile trying to continue to talk with me. I shrugged as I began to think over what I would say.

                “Nothing really, I got a job?” I smiled lightly hoping Bomi’s bus would arrive soon, so I could just wait in peace.

                “Chorong, why haven’t we talked?” Bomi asked looking towards the ground.

                “You’ve been busy haven’t you?”

                “Not just me.”

                “Well then I don’t know maybe feelings change.” I sighed saying something I probably shouldn’t have said, although I knew she didn’t get the true meaning of that sentence.

                “Oh” Bomi finally spoke as she lifted her eyes from the pavement to reach mine. I could tell she was upset, that wasn’t what I had intended to do.  I saw my bus heading towards the stop, I turned back towards Bomi giving a shy smile.

                “Friends right?” I said as Bomi made a confused expression. I breathed in leaning in and pressing my lips on hers, I pulled back avoiding her eyes.  “Goodbye”

As I hopped onto the bus I knew I had to say goodbye, not to Bomi but to the feelings I had for Bomi, the feelings that stretched beyond the limits of just friend, the feelings that shouldn’t have even been there. I smiled feeling relieved although it wasn’t going to be easy, although it may hurt sometimes. I knew that it was better off forgiving myself for the feelings I had for Bomi, and moving forward with my life. I looked towards the window noticing an awkwardly smiling Bomi, I felt my phone vibrate on my leg, I opened the text message she had sent.

                “Not goodbye. It’s ‘I’ll see you soon’” 

The ending. I hope you enjoyed my little story i wrote out of boredom. 

-undercovermusic.