Jongdae looked through the room while waiting for Minseok, but after he had drank up the coffee and walked through the room 10 times, he sat back down on the couch and waited. It was just 5 pm… he yawned and pulled the blanket over his legs and crossed his arms.

His head sunk onto his chest and soon he had fallen asleep.

“Jongdae… Jongdae, it’s past 9 pm. Let’s go home”, someone said gently.

Jongdae blinked and looked into Minseok’s face. Was he still dreaming?

“Jongdae, come. Time to leave”, Minseok said. Jongdae rubbed his eyes and got up.

For a moment he was confused about where he was, but then he recognized the small room.

“I have put your wet clothes into a plastic bag”, Minseok said and handed him said bag.

Jongdae got up and grabbed the two bags. “Thanks”, he murmured and suppressed a yawn.

Minseok smiled. “Let’s go”.

While they were driving home, Jongdae explained shortly where he lived and then their conversation turned into small talk.

“How’s soccer practice going?” – “Fine, thanks. Do you have a lot of exams coming up?” – “Yeah, sadly…”

Then they had reached Jongdae’s apartment.

“I have to return the clothes, but you’re coming tomorrow anyway, aren’t you?”, Minseok said. Jongdae laughed. “Sure”.

Then they fell silent and Jongdae didn’t want to leave, he felt like he had to tell him now or he would never confess.

“Uhm so… before you leave”, Minseok said before Jongdae could start and leaned over and grabbed something from the back seat.

It was a white box from the coffee shop, they were used for the cakes.

“It’s… a present”, Minseok said and looked at the steering wheel.

Jongdae placed the box onto his lap and pulled Minseok into a hug.

“Thanks”, he murmured. “Thank you for everything”.

Then he slowly let go of Minseok, but neither of them pulled back. Jongdae looked into Minseok’s eyes, trying to find the same feelings he had. But Minseok’s eyes were unreadable, so he backed out.

“Good night”, he murmured. Minseok nodded. “Good night”.

Jongdae got off the car and closed the door. He took a deep breath and walked towards his apartment. “Jongdae?”

He turned around and saw how Minseok quickly got off the car. He hurried towards him and it felt like a déjà-vu as he pulled him into a quick hug like he did the first time.

“Thank you, too”. Jongdae nodded. “Yeah…”

Then he couldn’t hold back anymore and cupped Minseok’s face with his free hand and locked their lips. He tilted his head and moved his lips against Minseok’s and then let them rest against Minseok’s, before he slowly made a step back.

Minseok then took a shaky breath and looked at Jongdae.

“Maybe… do you need help carrying all that stuff upstairs? I can… if you want to… I mean”, Minseok stuttered.

Jongdae bit his lip and let Minseok take one of his bags, they climbed the stairs in silence and when they stopped on the second floor, Jongdae turned around.

“Could you hold the cake for a second?”, he murmured. Minseok nodded and held it while Jongdae opened the door.

“It’s not very… tidy, especially since I left in a hurry this morning”, Jongdae murmured.

Minseok smiled. “No problem”.

He entered the small apartment after Jongdae, there was a living room and a tiny kitchen and two closed doors across the room.

“You can put the cake onto the table”, Jongdae murmured.

He disappeared into another room and brought away the two bags. As Minseok placed the box carefully onto the table, he noticed a large calendar hanging next to the table. Barely anything was written on it and next to it there was a picture pinned onto the wall. It showed Jongdae with the two friends he had been with at the coffee shop for the first time, they were all wearing suits. It seemed to show their graduation from high school.

When he turned around, he flinched as he hadn’t expected Jongdae to stand right behind him. Jongdae was looking right into his eyes.

“Minseok…”, he whispered. “Yes?”, Minseok breathed out as Jongdae’s fingers hesitatingly rested on his shoulders.

He leaned in a little, but backed out again. Minseok didn’t dare to move as he let Jongdae slowly come closer and closer until he finally could feel Jongdae’s nervous breath his lips. Minseok then tilted his head and leaned forward to bring their lips together. Their lips locked so perfectly that Jongdae felt a sudden rush of adrenalin through his veins. He felt how Minseok grabbed his shirt and leaned deeper into the kiss.

Their lips slowly moved against each other as Jongdae let his finger wander up into Minseok’s hair and stepped forward. Minseok was already leaning with his back against the cool wall and now Jongdae’s body was so impossibly close to his, he thought he could feel his heartbeat through the shirt. Maybe it was just his own heartbeat, or maybe their hearts beat simultaneously.

 Minseok opened his eyes and looked at Jongdae, but neither of them said a word. Jongdae leaned his forehead against Minseok’s with his eyes closed. When they let go of each other and Jongdae stepped backwards, Minseok noticed that the door Jongdae had walked through earlier was still open.

It was his bedroom, it was small as well. There was nothing in there except for the bed, a closet and a bedside table. On top of the bedside table there was standing a framed picture. It showed a young woman, she was very beautiful. Even though the picture was too far away to see details, he could see how her beautiful lips curved up in a familiar and natural way.

Jongdae seemed to have noticed Minseok’s stare as he suddenly closed the door. Minseok flinched and realized that it had been probably pretty rude to stare into his bedroom like that. But something in Jongdae’s eyes told him that he wouldn’t talk about the beautiful woman on the picture even if he asked him to.

Minseok grabbed Jongdae’s hand. “Jongdae… see you tomorrow”, he said.

Jongdae pulled him close and kissed him again. “Get home safely”, Jongdae whispered.

His eyes were soft again and he smiled. Minseok smiled back at him. “Sure”.

Jongdae guided him to the door and leaned against the doorframe and with a smile they said their goodbyes.

When Jongdae closed the door to his apartment, he touched his lips, he still could taste Minseok’s lips against his.

Jongdae turned around. Why did he give him cake?

Jongdae stretched and changed his clothes. After a quick shower, he opened the box and his heart skipped a beat. He wanted to run back so he could tell him about his feelings properly… and kiss him again.

Inside were a chocolate cake and a small card. Jongdae started at the calendar hanging next to the table. That’s why he had asked if he had had a date!

He read the card over and over again, so when he went to sleep he knew the words by heart.

“You probably know it already, but you’ve become a special person to me.

Happy Valentine’s Day, Jongdae. I hope you’ll like this chocolate cake, I’ve made it for you”.

-

Jongdae got up early the next day, although it was a Saturday and he had no classes. But there was a boy on his mind, Minseok. He needed to see him again! And when he would return the clothes, they might have the chance to talk in private and he could finally tell him… those three words he should have told him already yesterday.

Over night the rain had turned into snow and the streets were icy and slippery. After showering and eating a piece of the delicious chocolate cake, he made his way to the coffee shop. Luckily he had managed it to wash the clothes before falling asleep yesterday, so he took the now dry clothes from the clothesline and folded them.

He was getting pretty good at household chores, when he had been living with his father, they had had a maid to do all the stuff… Jongdae shortly closed his eyes and banished every thought of his father out of his mind.

 He got on the bus with a wide smile, he couldn’t wait to see Minseok again.

He hurried through the small crowd in the coffee shop and made his way to the bar, but Minseok was not there. Neither was Kibum standing there, it was a guy, Jongdae had never seen before. He frowned.

“Hi, uhm… is Minseok here?”, he asked.

The guy looked up, he was chewing on his bubble gum and eyed him. “Don’t you want to order something?”, he asked.

His voice sounded tired and the way he drawled, slightly annoyed Jongdae.

“Yeah, but you could you first tell me-?”, he started again.

“I don’t know if your date is here yet, how would I know?”, the guy sighed and rolled his eyes.

Jongdae took a deep breath. “He works here, he is a barista here”, Jongdae explained.

The guy shrugged. “Minseok… Last name?”, he asked. And Jongdae opened his mouth and realized that he didn’t even know his last name.

“I-… I don’t know. He’s the same height as me and has a bit chubby cheeks”, he described him instead. The guy frowned and shrugged.

Jongdae furrowed his eyebrows and was about to speak up again, when Kibum entered the coffee shop through the ‘staff only’ door

“Kibum!”, he called relieved. “Hey, is Minseok here?”, he asked.

Kibum puckered up his lips. “No, unfortunately not. And all we’ve got is this lousy replacement”, he grunted and shooed away the bubble gum chewing guy.

“He’s not here? O-Okay, why not?”, Jongdae asked worried.

Did Minseok maybe change his mind and didn’t want to see him anymore? But why would he simply not come to work because of that?

Kibum grabbed a cup and raised one brow.

“Why don’t you ask him yourself?”, he asked. “And now, if you don’t want to order something, please leave. We have other customers, too”, he said coolly.

Jongdae bit his lip and reached Kibum the bag with the clothes and left.

He stopped outside of the coffee shop and turned around, but there was no Minseok coming out of the ‘staff only’ door. There was only this bubble gum guy and Kibum.

Why was Minseok not here?

Ask him yourself. Jongdae wanted to scream, he had never asked for Minseok’s number. He couldn’t ask himself and Minseok never told him the name of the college he was going to.

He had no idea about his last name and didn’t know where he lived. Now that he was thinking about it, all information he had about Minseok seemed completely useless.

Minseok, where are you, he thought and looked around as if he could jump up behind him and laugh.

Jongdae sighed and pulled out his mobile.

“Suho, I need your help. Maybe I’m just overreacting and freaking out, but…”, he started right away.

“What happened?”, Suho asked.

“Minseok is gone. And the other baristas didn’t want to tell me where he is. I think they don’t know either”, Jongdae said.

Suho didn’t reply at once, he seemed to hesitate. “Maybe he got ill and stayed at home?”, he said slowly.

Jongdae shook his head.

“But the Kibum would have just said that he’s ill. He said ‘Ask him yourself’. That doesn’t sound like Minseok called and said he’s ill. They even have a replacement for him!”, he said distraught.

Suho sighed. “Okay don’t freak out, Jongdae. I’m sure it’s no big thing. We could check his college and ask some of his classmates. You said he usually has soccer practice in the mornings, just go there and ask. I’m sure they’ll tell you about him”, Suho said.

Jongdae bit his lip and as he didn’t say a word, Suho groaned.

“You don’t know to which college he goes, right?”, he asked.

Jongdae tore his hair. “I know. I feel so stupid. I don’t have his number, I don’t know his last name. I don’t know the name of his college. I know nothing about him! What have I been doing all the time?”, he called angrily.

“Haven’t you guys been talking about yourselves?”, Suho asked.

“We did!”, Jongdae said.

Suho sighed. “Just wait for tomorrow and go there again. I’m sure he’ll be there and everything is fine”, he said.

Jongdae hesitated. “But he said he would be here today”, he murmured.

“He’ll be there tomorrow and explain why he wasn’t there today. Don’t think too much into it, Jongdae. It’s not like you guys are already dating or anything”, Suho said.

Jongdae shoved his chin forward and frowned.

“You are?”, Suho called as if he had seen Jongdae’s expression.

“Well, we’ve made out… a lot. And he gave me a Valentine’s present”, Jongdae said.

“Then… it’s really kind of weird that he’s not there. But don’t stress yourself out”, Suho calmed him.

But Suho wasn’t right, on the next day, Minseok wasn’t there as well. And since Kibum wasn’t there either and the bubble gum guy wouldn’t tell him anything, he got no new information.

Suho tried to calm him, but Jongdae could see in his eyes that Suho didn’t believe his own words after three days of Minseok’s disappearing. It was already Tuesday and he hadn’t received a word from Minseok.

“Maybe I’m going to check all sports colleges in town and ask if there is a guy called Minseok on the team”, Jongdae murmured.

“As if there was no other boy who could be called Minseok”, Chanyeol threw in. Jongdae flinched.

He had forgotten he was sitting in the cafeteria together with Suho, Chanyeol and Baekhyun. Baekhyun who was sitting on Chanyeol’s lap eyed Jongdae.

“I understand how you feel. It is outrageous to leave you like this, but are you sure you want to run after a guy like him?”, he asked.

Chanyeol wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and rested his chin on his back.

“Baekhyun’s right. Is it worth to run after him after he left without a word?”, Chanyeol asked. Jongdae snatched his bag and got up.

“He’s more than worth it!”, he called. But even Suho was not defending Minseok, he just slightly shook his head.

“You don’t know him that well, you said it yourself, didn’t you?”, he said slowly with an apologetic expression.

“Minseok is not like that!”, Jongdae called but as he listened to his own words he realized how desperate he sounded.

He wanted to believe his own words so badly, he hadn’t even questioned Minseok for one second. Maybe they were right and he should forget about him.

He sat down again and stared at the table, Suho patted his back.

“It’s not the best time to think about it, there are exams coming up and especially the one you missed last time. They are important. Focus on that and not on that Minseok guy”, Suho said. Jongdae nodded without even listening properly to Suho’s words.

When they were passing by the coffee shop this afternoon with the bus, he couldn’t help but try to look for Minseok. But in the few seconds they passed by, he couldn’t see Minseok and Jongdae clenched his hands to fists. It was the first day not to go to the coffee shop after university classes.

On the next days, Jongdae still went to the coffee shop without letting his friends know, but Minseok still hadn’t returned. So Jongdae started collecting all names and addresses of sports colleges in Seoul instead of studying for his exams. He tried to find out the schedules for soccer practices, but as he couldn’t find much, he decided to get up earlier and visit the colleges by himself.

He successfully found the soccer teams, but either they had no Minseok on their team or there was a boy who was called Minseok, but it wasn’t his Minseok. His…

After a week had passed and Jongdae hadn’t found Minseok or his soccer team, he felt like going crazy.

His friends couldn’t deny anymore that nothing had happened. But it was hard to convince Jongdae to study and come to class instead of searching for Minseok.

“It’s like you’re obsessed!”, Suho said while shoving two books into Jongdae’s arms.

“You need to read chapter 4 to 7. It covers the most important topics for the exam!”, he said. “Hey, are you listening?”

But Jongdae was far away with his thoughts. After his worry, there had been fear and then anger, now, he was feeling everything at once. He would never tell Suho, that he couldn’t sleep at night and when he had cried himself to sleep.

He hated that a boy he barely knew – although he had thought they were really getting close by now – was making him feel that weak.

Suho would freak out, since there were no parents to look after Jongdae, he was always worried about him. Who would check if he was eating enough, who made sure he was okay? No one. And even though they were close friends, Jongdae distanced himself more and more.

Jongdae somehow managed it to get through his exams the next week and after that he stopped skipping classes. Even though he still didn’t talk much anymore, he didn’t mention Minseok anymore and he didn’t go to the coffee shop anymore.

Sure, his secret glances into the coffee shop in the mornings and afternoons from the bus went unnoticed.

But even those got rarer.

A month later, the holidays were coming up and Jongdae had even made plans with the others and seemed to slowly get over Minseok, he was walking home from university.

He had missed the bus, but since the weather was really nice and warm, he enjoyed the walk. Today in the morning, he had checked his calendar to write down when he would leave to Busan with his friends and had seen that it had been exactly one month since Valentine’s Day and since their kiss.

He had tried his best to forget about Minseok, but of course he hadn’t forgotten him. Sure there had been some peaceful hours when he had hung out with Suho, Chanyeol and Baekhyun. He had met Baekhyun’s friends: Jongin and Yifan.

And he didn’t think about Minseok at those times, but when he was home alone at night, his image would always come to his mind.

When he passed by the coffee shop, he glanced inside more by habit than consciously and saw that it was pretty crowded again.

But not as full as last month. He hadn’t noticed that he had stopped and stared through the glass window. There was Kibum behind the bar, he was taking orders from a young couple. And a young girl that was obviously new was just cleaning the floor where someone had spilled some coffee.

She laughed and brought the cleaning utensils back with her and opened the door ‘staff only’. She smiled at a boy who came out through the ‘staff only’ door. She held it open for him because he was walking on crutches. The boy thanked her and smiled. Then he went behind the bar to help Kibum.

His cheeks weren’t really chubby anymore, he seemed to have lost a lot of weight. Jongdae didn’t know how he got into the coffee shop, his feet must have moved on their own, but suddenly he was standing in front of the bar and looked into Minseok’s eyes.

All the frustration, the anger, the sadness and all his love crushed down on Jongdae; he felt everything at once. He wanted to slap him hard and kiss him at the same time.

Minseok stared back and neither of them said a word for a while. Finally Kibum coughed quietly and Minseok flinched.

“H-Hi… the same as usual?”, Minseok asked quietly. Jongdae hesitated.

Today in the morning he had thought for a moment about his plan he had had after Valentine’s Day.

“Jongdae?”

He looked up and saw how Minseok was leaning against the bar, his hands wandered over the surface of the bar and stopped before he could reach his hands. There was something in his eyes that made Jongdae shook his head and decide to go for his plan.

“No, I want a hot chocolate with whipped cream”, he ordered.

Minseok looked surprised, but he turned to the side and hopped on one leg to the coffee machine and made him a hot chocolate. Jongdae took the cup without a word and turned around.

“Jongdae?”, Minseok called. “Jongdae…”

But Jongdae didn’t turn around to see the tears in Minseok’s eyes. When Minseok wiped his eyes, he looked down onto the bar and saw a small folded piece of paper.

He frowned and unfolded it.

“Come to table 4”.

Minseok hesitated. Was that note for him? Had Jongdae left it for him? He quickly grabbed his crutches and made his way to table 4.

It was in the corner and often occupied by couples who secretly met, since the table couldn’t be seen from the outside nor from the bar, since there was a huge plant that blocked the view. He stopped and stared at the table. No one was sitting there, but the cup with the hot chocolate was there together with a card.

“Happy White Day, Minseok”, it said.

Minseok said down and buried his face in his arms and cried, he didn’t even stop when he felt hands on his back.

“Minseok, why are you crying? I feel like I am the one who should be”, Jongdae said quietly. Minseok turned around and tried to stop his tears from falling.

“I-I’m so sorry… I’m really sorry”, he sobbed. “I promise I wanted to contact you, but I didn’t know how”, he called.

Jongdae shook his head and cupped Minseok’s face.

“What happened, Minseok?”, he asked. “I was so worried, I didn’t sleep for weeks!”

Minseok’s eyes widened. “What? No, I feel even worse now!”, he called and pulled Jongdae into an uncomfortable hug as the chair was in between them.

Jongdae gently shoved Minseok’s hands off and sat down on the corner sofa. “Now drink the hot choco and tell me what happened”, Jongdae demanded.

Minseok obeyed and took a sip of the hot chocolate.

“It happened on my way home, just after I brought you home. I got involved into a car accident”, Minseok started.

“You had a car accident?”, Jongdae called and nearly jumped up. Minseok raised his hands.

“Calm down! That’s why I told no one at first. It was nothing severe, I broke my leg and had a slight concussion. I was in hospital until yesterday! I’m sorry, I would have called you, but I don’t know your number”, Minseok apologized.

Jongdae sighed. “God, I was so worried. You have no idea! And everyone said that you’re an idiot and I should forget about you, because you left without a word and I already thought you don’t want to see me anymore”, Jongdae blurted out.

Minseok let the cup sink, his upper lip was covered with whipped cream. “NO!”, he called. “I would never do that!”

Jongdae couldn’t suppress a smile as he saw Minseok with the little white beard of whipped cream on his upper lip. He cupped Minseok’s face and pulled him close and gently kissed away the whipped cream.

When he let go of Minseok, he still had his eyes closed. Jongdae leaned forward again and kissed Minseok’s forehead.

“Don’t scare me like that ever again. And give me your number now, before something else happens!”, he whispered.

Minseok opened his eyes and smiled. Jongdae pulled the chair Minseok was sitting on closer and locked their lips again.

“I’ve missed you so badly and I was so terribly angry at you because after you left, I realized how much I loved you”, Jongdae whispered against Minseok’s lips.

Minseok wrapped his arms around Jongdae’s neck. He tilted his head and deepened their kiss.

“I thought you’d hate me”, Minseok said breathless as they let go of each other.

“You owe me one”, Jongdae said and shook his head. “How can I make up?”, Minseok asked immediately.

And Jongdae laughed. “Until when do you have to work today?”, he asked. “Until 8 pm”, Minseok said.

Jongdae nodded. “Then how about going somewhere after that and you tell me everything in detail? And especially explain to me, how it’s possible that I checked on every damn college soccer team in Seoul, but I couldn’t find the one you’re on!”, Jongdae said.

“You… you did that?”, Minseok asked. Jongdae blushed and looked away. “Is that creepy?”, he murmured.

Minseok stared at his feet. “No, I just feel like I don’t even deserve your love”, he said.

Jongdae reached out his hands and linked their fingers. “You do and I think you deserve so much more”, Jongdae said.

Minseok stared at him. “Aren’t you mad at all at me?”, he asked.

Jongdae sighed. “A lot”. Minseok opened his mouth, but Jongdae continued:

“But I guess I’ve missed you more. I’ll keep in mind though that you owe me one”, he added.

Minseok leaned his head on Jongdae’s shoulder.

“I think I should be afraid now, but I’m going to do anything anyways…”

Happy Valentine's Day, guys~

I hope you enjoyed this story a lot, this is actually the last part, but I love xiuchen a lot and I think I'm going to write a short epilogue

since a few asked me about Jongdae's past aaaand maybe you're curious what they are going to do on their date later

Penny, I hope you liked this story ♥

Sorry you always had to wait so long for updates... the epilogue will come quicker!