[bambam1a has entered the chat room]

[mark_tuan has entered the chat room]

mark_tuan: hey

bambam1a: hi~ how was ur day?

mark_tuan: good. u?

bambam1a: same ^^ when r u coming?

mark_tuan: i move in next thurs

bambam1a: yay! i’m so excited ^^

mark_tuan: where r we meeting?

bambam1a: pick me up from school?

mark_tuan: what time?

mark_tuan: it’s the intl thai one in seoul right?

bambam1a: yup that one~ school ends @ 9 pm

mark_tuan: i’ll be there

bambam1a: i can’t wait ^^

bambam1a: i gtg school starts in 1 hour

mark_tuan: bye c u soon
 
bambam1a: ily ^^

[bambam1a has left the chat room]

[mark_tuan has left the chat room]

--

“You look way too excited, Kunpimook,” one of BamBam’s classmates mentions. BamBam can only smile at him, bouncing his fingers on his knees and checking the clock every three seconds. Today is the day; BamBam finally gets to meet his beloved Mark Tuan in person.

 --

BamBam and Mark met by chance on a chat room one of their friends, Jackson, had set up concerning his latest fencing win. The two got along well, chatting with each other every few weeks or so. The occasional chatting increased until they talked to each other every morning before BamBam left for school and every evening after he got home.

After a year of getting to know each other, the two had their first video chat. That was when BamBam fell in love.

BamBam knew Mark was quite a bit older than him; he knew that Mark was very athletic; and he knew Mark was just as passionate about music as he was, but he had no idea Mark was that handsome. BamBam’s heart had never beaten that fast before. He was in love.

And Mark was okay with it. Though he never blatantly said the words “I love you”, he never showed any signs of dislike when those words came from BamBam. Mark never shied away or was disgusted when BamBam complemented him. BamBam knows that there are certain things he should be worried about; a lot of people tell him that Mark is only entertaining his childish whims just so they will have . A lot of people tell him that is the only motive of guys like Mark. BamBam likes to think that maybe Mark actually likes him but sometimes it’s hard to ignore that fear when he hears stories of teenagers being used by someone they met on the internet.

BamBam likes to think that there is something special between him and Mark, but he’s just not so sure, and Mark doesn’t give any indication either.

He guesses he’ll just have to persevere and find out.

--

Jackson picks Mark up from the airport and drives him to his apartment. The ride is noisy but only because of Jackson; Mark isn’t much for talking. As they unpack and set things up, Jackson asks about BamBam.

“You do know he’s a high schooler right? A freshman? As in he was born in1997? As in you can go to jail for simply looking at him the wrong way, let alone doing the do with him?” Jackson looks at his older friend quizzically.

“Yeah,” Mark replies simply, laying his clothes on the bed. Jackson mouths the word ‘yeah’ mockingly, rolling his eyes.

“Dude, this is weird. And wrong.”

“I never said I loved him or that I wanted to do ‘the do’ with him,” Mark reminds Jackson, “besides, you have no room to talk; you had a crush on your 40-year-old fencing instructor, remember?”

“IT WAS A PHASE! And he didn’t go along with it! That’s the problem, Mark; you’re okay with this.” Jackson stares at the older man seriously. “BamBam is seriously in love with you. And you’re not serious. Don’t do this.”

“I never said I wasn’t serious.”

“OH MY GOD, for the love of every spicy sausage dish ever! Mark. Mark, will you make up your mind?”

“Do you know where I can buy some hydrangeas?”

“You’re not even listening to me!” Jackson throws his hands up in frustration.

“BamBam likes hydrangeas.”

“He’s not listening to me,” Jackson mutters. “Hey Mark, when you go to jail for ia don’t ask me for help.”

“What color should I get? Blue?”

“Actually, BamBam will probably kill you as soon as he finds out you’re just playing around, which means he’ll be the one in jail.”

“Should I get pink? To match his hair?”

“But that’s okay; I wouldn’t mind bailing the kid out of jail.”

“Jackson, will you shut up? I’m trying to decide on what kind of hydrangeas to get BamBam.” Mark shakes his head with distaste, glaring at Jackson.

“I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOUR PINK OR BLUE HYDRAS! Listen to me Mark! Don’t play around. Be smart and just establish your relationship as FRIENDS,” Jackson pleads, gripping Mark’s shoulders and looking him in the eyes.

“Hydrangeas, not hydras, Jackson.”

“I give up. I quit.” Jackson stands up and walks towards the door. Right before Jackson leaves, Mark calls his name. He turns around, sighing. “What?”

“I’m for real about BamBam—BamBam, not .”

“You better be, punk. I’ll mess you up if you aren’t.” Jackson smiles, shaking his head as he walks out of the door, leaving Mark to get situated in his new apartment.

--

BamBam waits patiently next to his school’s gates for Mark. Some of his friends pass by, inquiring about his after school plans. He waves them all off. BamBam can feel his heart beat speed up as he spots a tuft of red hair a few blocks away. Mark has red hair. The messy head of hair gets closer and closer and BamBam fidgets in his spot. He wants so desperately to run to Mark and tackle him in a hug, but BamBam waits; he has to show some sort of restraint. It's already bad enough BamBam is physically a child compared to Mark; he doesn't have to act like a child as well.

Mark walks up to BamBam, that lazy smile that drives BamBam crazy on his face. 

"Hey." The word barely escapes Mark's lips before BamBam attacks, wrapping his arms around Mark's torso. Mark laughs a bit, returning the hug, his strong arms enveloping BamBam's small frame. "Someone's excited to see me," Mark muses.

"I seriously can't believe this is happening. Like, you're really here, you're really standing in front of me," BamBam murmurs, looking up at Mark's face when he pulls away from the hug.

"And I really got you some flowers." It's then that BamBam notices the pot of pink hydrangeas in Mark's hands. BamBam can feel himself tearing up from happiness. "Whoa whoa, don't cry. I thought you liked hydrangeas?" The 'oh I ed up' look on Mark's face only makes BamBam happier. In this moment BamBam has no doubts that Mark loves him.

"I do! You're the best, Mark. I love you!" BamBam hugs Mark again and the latter almost says those words back. Almost. He's not ready, yet; Mark needs time. Sorry BamBam, Mark murmurs to himself, you're gonna have to persevere and be patient.

-- 

"It's a bit shabby," BamBam says as he opens the door to his room, "but it's pretty good considering my options. The auntie that owns this boarding house is really nice, too." Mark looks around the plain, small room, taking in the little mannerisms of BamBam that are evident with his decorating skills. The bed is neatly made and there are more knick knacks than books on the bookshelf next to the bed. On the other side of the room there's a desk that looks like it's seen better days; on the desk is a picture frame of what Mark guesses is BamBam's family, a laptop and a couple of textbooks. 

BamBam places the hydrangeas on his desk next to his laptop and turns to smile at Mark. "Well, what do you wanna do? I can show you around Seoul if you'd like." BamBam shifts on his feet nervously; he didn’t mean to stand next to his bed when he asked that question, but there’s really limited options as to where BamBam can stand that isn’t right next to his bed. He feels his heart beat quicken. If Mark is in this to get laid, now is the perfect opportunity.

"Whatever's cool with you." Mark smiles lazily and BamBam doesn't remember Mark being this cute before. It's painful, really; BamBam has no idea how he's still functioning after being within three feet of such an attractive boy for more than thirty minutes. "What are the popular places?"

"Mmm, well, HongDae and MyeongDong are really popular shopping centers." BamBam purposefully doesn't mention they're also hot spots for young couples looking for a ‘fun’ date night.

"Let's go to HongDae then."

--

It’s been almost three weeks since Mark has moved to Seoul and life has been nothing but amazing for BamBam.

On weeknights when Mark was free he and BamBam would sit on BamBam’s bed, and Mark would tutor BamBam in literature and BamBam would poetically pray that Mark wouldn’t take him right then and there. Mark would walk BamBam home from school every Friday night and they would just talk and talk; they talked about themselves, they talked about each other and they talked about their dreams. On Saturdays BamBam would take Mark to a new place in Seoul and they would have a date—or rather BamBam likes to call them dates. On Sundays Mark would take BamBam to his favorite place in Seoul, the top of Namsan Tower, where they would stroll—sometimes hand-in-hand, sometimes arm-in-arm—along the walls of lovers’ locks. Mark liked to trace his fingers along the locks as if he could tell what stories they held just by touching them. BamBam liked to look up at the night sky and inhale deeply, as if he could know the number of stars in the universe just by breathing in.

It’s been almost three weeks since Mark has moved to Seoul and BamBam almost forgot the biting fear of his relationship with Mark being all a façade for .

And then Mark asks a question.

--

“Hey, BamBam,” Mark starts, rubbing his arm. It’s a Friday night. BamBam looks at him as they walk. “Do you want to come live with me?”

BamBam stops in his tracks, but somehow Mark knew that was going to happen because he stops as well. “W-what?” BamBam’s voice is small, out of fear and out of joy and out of anticipation. Fearful that Mark’s time of playing this love game has ended, that now he wants more; joyful that Mark trusts him and—hopefully—loves him enough to ask him to live with him; and full of anticipation as to what will happen next.

“I know, it’s silly, but, do you want to come live with me?” Mark’s blushing, or maybe it’s just the glow of the crappy streetlamp on his pale skin. BamBam doesn’t know what to say. “I know that we’ve only known each other in person for like a month, but…” Mark trails off. Then BamBam finds his voice.

“But…?” BamBam pushes on; he wants to know.

“But I’ve known you for years and I know that I trust you and…” Mark’s words fail him again. BamBam has a smile tiptoeing on his lips, almost there but almost not there.

“And…?” The amusement in BamBam’s voice must be clear now.

“I feel bad. You’re too…I don’t know, too….you’re too much to be living in such a rundown place on your own. You’re too fragile. You’re too important. I want to make sure nothing bad happens to you. I’ll feel a lot better if you’re living with me, where I can keep an eye on you. I though just living in the same city as you would be enough, but now I know I need to personally make sure you stay safe.”

Mark’s gaze is uncharacteristically weak, his eyes looking off to the side, avoiding BamBam’s face. BamBam is absolutely smiling now. “Why? Why do you care so much?” BamBam thinks he knows the reason, but he wants to hear it coming from Mark’s own lips in Mark’s own voice.

“Because I love you.” Mark is staring at BamBam now, wild emotion in his eyes; BamBam gasps at the pure passion he was not expecting to see. “BamBam, I love you. And I know, after all these years of you saying those same words to me, that I’m ready to love you know. I’m ready to protect you and provide for you and I’m confident enough that I can accept your love and not worry about hurting you.”

“You…” Now it’s BamBam’s turn to lose his voice. Tears are trickling down his cheeks and the ‘oh I ed up’ look is back on Mark’s face. BamBam tackles him in a hug, relaxing when Mark’s hands fly almost immediately to rub soothing circles across his back.

“So, are you gonna live with me or not?” BamBam can’t see his face, but he’s sure Mark’s lazy smirk has returned. BamBam pulls away to look at Mark, smiling when he sees the confidence returning to the older man’s eyes. Time to wipe that confidence away again, BamBam muses. He leans up, pressing a full, sweet kiss onto Mark’s lips. When he pulls away Mark is blinking in surprise, and BamBam laughs.

“I love you~”

Mark kisses him again. “I love you too.”