The music subsided and only the echo of it was left.

 

He sat there. I kept looking at the piano, imagining Lay's face. Going back to the past.

 

That last time.

 

A year ago.

 

"May I know your name?" He asked me, his stare focus on my face, waiting for my answer.

"Aya. Aya Li." I answered him. The same way I answered Lay back then.

"I'm Luhan." He extended his hand for a handshake.

 

But I didn't take it.

 

He awkwardly pulled his hands away.

 

"I guess you don't want to shake hands." He let out a sheepish laugh. He turned to the piano and played a much brighter piece.

 

"What are you doing here? In an abandoned building, in a deserted place. You shouldn't be alone here, you know." He smiled warmly.

 

I looked at that smile of his. It was identical to Lay's.

 

I couldn't think of anyone but Lay.

 

His stare, his movements, his smile, everything about him, it's just like Lay's.

 

He was like Lay.

 

But no.

 

Lay's gone.

 

And he's not coming back.

 

I tried to make myself accept that fact.

 

I tried to program it inside my brain. For the past year.

 

For a whole year now.

 

But useless.

 

I still missed him.

 

"Do you believe in reincarnation?" Lay asked me once, while we were sitting on the grass, hands laced together.

"I don't know. Was it a Hinduism faith? Are you planning to change your religion?" I felt his grip tighten a bit.

"Being in this world for 20 plus years, I would prefer not to believe in it. But you see, being risen from the death, as a different person, as a new person, don't you think it's amazing?" His hopeful eyes showed more hope than ever.

"I wouldn't have to suffer this disease, if that happens. And you, you wouldn't cry anymore. Someday, when I reincarnate, I would find you, wherever you are, I would stay beside you and never leave you again." His final words made my tears drop again, silently.

 

Lay was like a kid. He's always full of hope, full of compassion. He always looks at the bright side of the world.

 

Lay was like a little candle. No matter how little he may seem, eh would always make a change, he would prefer to make a change.

 

 

"Do you believe in reincarnation?" Luhan snapped me back in reality. I shook my head slowly in return.

"I do believe in reincarnation, actually." He let his hands fall from the keys to his side.

"Being raised from the death, being a new person, don't you think it's amazing?" I automatically raised my eyes to look at him.

 

Lay, is that you?

 

He laughed, that very familiar one.

 

"Reincarnation... I do think it's absurd."

"Absurd but amazing at the same time." He said and turned to the piano again.

 

This person beside me, and everything about him, it completely reminds me of Lay.

 

But it could just be because I miss Lay a lot. It's just like that.

 

He's just a stranger.

 

He's not Lay.

 

I tried to shake off the thought of Lay, but as always, I can't. I really can't.

 

I slowly lean over,

 

and hug this person beside me.

 

He looked surprise but he hugged me back.

 

 

After a year of being lost, of being far away,

 

I finally found my way back home.

 

My way back Lay.

 

 

I closed my eyes.

 

And pretend that this person beside me

 

 

was Lay.