We made camp in the brush that night. Hoya thought it would be a good idea to let the canyon walls protect us. Namu disagreed, saying we could get trapped there in the event of another attack. I personally didn't have a preference (what would I know about camping?), so we went with Hoya's plan.

Namu insisted that Hoya stay up and keep watch, much to Hoya's chagrin.

"There's no way," he said. "I need sleep too, if you want me to protect your sorry come morning. We'll take turns."

Namu made a playfully whiny fuss, but I knew he was just kidding because he threw me a smile. Even if he had no weaponry experience, I remembered that his mind-hearing was enough to make him aware of any intruders. As I thought this, he nodded at me as if to say, Neh, majayo.

We made a small campfire and sat around it. I huddled in close, warming my hands.

"Hoya," I called.

He looked up at me.

"There's one thing you didn't explain."

"Hmm?"

"... After you brought me to the hospital... how did I end up in a Syndicate cart?"

He bowed his head a little. "I was hoping you wouldn't ask. It's not something I'm proud of."

I stared at him, waiting patiently. He sighed.

"After you were sedated, the hospital staff got to talking and grew nervous that you kept calling out for that Kim Sunggyu--"

"Yah!" Namu exclaimed in disgust. "Would you watch your mouth?!"

"Namu. Do you see any Rebel die-hards around??"

"No, but... but all the same! That name is dangerous!"

"Yah. Go back to keeping watch and leave me be."

Namu grumbled to himself, facing the forest once more. I waited again for Hoya.

"Anyways, most all of them were decided on keeping you in restraints and turning you in to the closest Rebellion leader come morning. Back then, Jjang was closest. I stood off to the side, listening, and nodded in agreement with that winning idea. It meant that at the very least, you'd be kept alive and receive a fair trial. Plus, it gave us the chance to figure you out.

"But there was one man, a surgeon, who did not agree with everyone else. He argued that you should be executed right there on the table. It put everyone on edge-- after all, doctors are supposed to do no harm. But he kept insisting and insisting and eventually he demanded a vote. Sure, he was far outnumbered, and it was decided that you would be kept alive. But that surgeon was irate, I could see it in his face, and then, when everyone else was talking and distracted, I watched as he silently motioned to his assistant, and together, they furtively left the room.

"I knew they were up to no good. So, I followed them. And, hidden, I listened as the surgeon described to his assistant that he planned to poison you through your IV. That very night."

I took a deep breath in alarm. Hoya continued.

"So... here is where my regret lies..." He took a deep breath, hesitating, and dropped his head in shame.

"Ooh! That is pretty bad," Namu chimed in.

"YAH! Stay out of my head!! Ok... okay, here it is. That night, after I heard the surgeon's malicious plan... I went to the nearest Syndicate embassy and tipped them off about that Rebellion hospital. And ultimately, I let the Syndicate attack."

I gasped. "Chincha??"

"But you have to understand! I knew you were somehow valuable to the Rebellion! I just knew it! And I couldn't just sneak you out of the hopsital. I mean, how bad would it look if Hoya the Warrior kidnapped a captive from fellow Rebels?! No... no, that cannot happen. So I let the Syndicate descend and take you. And in the dead of night, I blew up the cart you were riding in and won you back."

"And... and all those people from the hospital? The good ones who voted that I should live?"

Hoya only lowered his head in shame. All of a sudden, the strong and amazing warrior who has been protecting me all this time, who I looked to and depended on most in this awful world... all of a sudden, he looked less shiny. Less heroic.

"Mian," he said to me, not meeting my eye. "But it had to be done. We need to know who you are. So there it is. Now you know everything. At least everything since I first saw you."

I didn't have any words to say to him. I needed time to digest. The truth was that good people died so that I could be saved. So that I could live and somehow help this Rebellion that I still didn't fully understand. I was struck with terror when I realized that I might not be of any help to them. Hell, I don't even remember my time with this world's Sunggyu. And if the memories never come back to me, what then?

I suddenly felt responsible for all of those innocent people's deaths. The weight of that guilt crushed down on me, and I tossed and turned until sleep finally, finally arrested me. My last thought was a dark one.

For the first time in my life, I wished I wasn't alive. In a strange way, I felt that I didn't deserve it.

***

"Yah. Jaemi."

Neh?

"What do you do for fun?"

I guess I like to read a lot.

"Do you write too?"

Occasionally. Just in a journal, though.

"Would you ever let me read it?"

No.

"Interesting. What about Hoya?"

Definitely not.

"Interesting! Is it because you like him??"

Not like that. Don't forget, I'm engaged in my old world.

"Oh! You hesitated!"

NO I DIDN'T, PABO NAMU, STOP INSTIGATING DRAMA. 

"Yah, yah, yah! If you two are going to talk, can't you do it out loud?? I'm tired of hearing only Namu's voice, chincha, it's annoying..."

"Just be thankful I haven't started singing yet, Hoyaaa."

Haha! Sorry, Hoya. Oops! I mean... "Sorry Hoya."

We didn't talk about Hoya's confession from the night before. Without saying it, we all knew it was best to just let it go. For now, at least.

The trail began to get steeper and I struggled to keep up. Namu was a good sport, offering to take my heavy load every so often. But even without it, my legs and my lungs burned with the effort of the upward climb.

"Just think to yourself, Jaemi. After this, you'll have killer legs!"

Not now, Namu.

"Leave her be, Namu."

Then, finally, the trail begain to descend, dipping deep into a woody forest where the temperatures were cooler and we couldn't see the sun. I felt so relieved, grateful for a break. We (well, mostly Namu and I) carried on in friendly banter. He let slip that he used to work as a singer in his hometown. I asked that he give us a sample, to which Hoya reacted by charging up ahead of us on the trail. It made me laugh.

We reached Pockery at high noon. Just like Rivall, there was an impossibly large, heavy black gate fortifying it. But unlike before, Hoya looked up at it, frowning a bit.

"Something isn't right here."

I frowned too, but in confusion. To me, it was just as daunting and scary as the last gate. I couldn't spot a single difference. Namu took a moment to mind-listen, but then he shrugged his shoulders, also coming up blank.

Hoya took the horn from my belt and raised it to his lips. He hesitated for a fraction of a moment, but then blew it as before.

On cue, there was that strange whizzing sound. Hoya looked up, ready to greet the coming arrow. And then, his eyes bugged out in shock.

"Look out!!"

Instead of one arrow, there were three. Three that came down. Namu heard it coming and dodged at the last moment. Hoya used his speed to dodge his as well.

But I was nowhere near as prepared.

Suddenly, a large mass freighted into me, knocking me to the ground. I realized it was Hoya. And in saving me, the arrow pierced through that muscle just above his collarbone. Just low enough to slice cleanly through.

I took a sharp intake of breath, pinned down by Hoya, staring straight into where the arrow pierced his body. "Namu!!" I called in panic.

But he was already in motion, pulling Hoya off of me and studying the injury and trying to figure out how best to fish the arrow out. He was just about to begin, hands on both sides of the arrow. I helplessly kneeled beside Hoya, unable to do more than watch him wriggle on the ground with the burning pain.

When suddenly there was a deep clang, and the gate began to open.

Namu froze, eyes instantly wide and staring at me in terror. Even Hoya paused his squirming on the ground to utter a single word through his clenched jaw.

"Run," he said.

But we all knew it was too late. I looked towards the gate, eerily sliding open to show a burning town beyond. And there, on the path ahead, a figure faced us. Dressed in a black tunic, with a sabre tucked to his side.

"No," was all Namu could say, his voice cracking in fear. "No way. It's... it's not possible."

But there he was. With that unsmiling face that I have come to know so, so well. Only, never before had I felt so much terror on seeing it.

---