“Cut!” The director shouted. It was a frustrating day for Mr. Wu Fan. He has to play the role of a chicken killer, along with his teammates: Onew, Key, Tao, Baekhyun, Xiumin and Chen.

Onew: The chicken maniac.

Key: The leader.

Tao: The wushu killer.

Baekhyun: The eyeliner hapkido killer.

Xiumin: The baozi taewondo killer.

Chen: The chicken deliver.

And last but not least; Kris: The cold city guy who works for KFC.

These were the roles in their movies. Kris was the main actor with the name Wu Fan, the guy who worked for KFC and helped his teammates to kill as much chickens as they could. One day as they were trying to kill as much chickens as they could, Wu Fan couldn’t resist anymore and yelled: “Chicken is not my style!”

“OK now let’s start again!” The director shouted and the cameras started filming.

“No more killing chickens! It’s a shame for us, Humans to kill these innocent creatures.” Wu Fan said half heartedly. Indeed, Wu Fan was a Human willing to sacrifice himself for eatable animals. ‘They were meant to eat.’ He said. ‘But they have their own life like we do.’

“Dang Wu Fan! They were made for us to eat.” Key yells while Onew was pointing a finger at Wu Fan.

“You! You said you loved chicken!” Onew shouted, tears already falling from his eyes.

“Sorry. But I can’t keep on acting. Chicken is not my style.” He said truthfully, almost getting a bullet from the shotgun Tao had.

“If we don’t do this now, we won’t get our money. No money, no Gucci! Huhu why gege? Why?!” He started crying a Han river.

“You idiot! How could you do this to us?” Xiumin said while pouting, eyes full with tears.

“Because of you my eyeliner will be ruined and I won’t have the chance to buy another one because KFC won’t give me money.” Baekhyun cried and Wu Fan felt his heart aching.

“And I thought we were going to eat chicken nuggets after we finished our mission.” Chen said as he glared right through Wu Fan’s eyes.

“Fine.” Wu Fan grabbed the riffle again and walked in front of the group of brave chickens. “Let’s catch some chicks.” He smirked and the happiness came back on his teammates’ faces.

“Wu Fan is back! Hooray!” They all shouted as they walked in front of the chickens and started shooting.

“Fire!!!” Leader Key shouted and the Chicken War began.

“Cut!” The director shouted again, a big grin visible on his face. “Now this is what I call a movie!”

The guys walked towards him and they stared into the screen of the computer that was showing the scene they filmed. All of them were smiling, hi five-ing and hugging each other while Kris, was standing in a corner.

“Chicken is not my style he whispered again as he couldn’t resist anymore.

Kris, the real him hated chicken. Since he was a kid he would always say that chicken wasn’t his style. When he went out to eat with friends, he would never, ever, order chicken.

“Disgusting creatures.” He whispered as he rubbed his temples. They had filmed almost the whole movie, now the only part left was… The part he died because of the Mother Chicken killing him.

“The final shot will be filmed tomorrow. Kris, please remember the script and do your best. You don’t want to remain here for your whole life, do you?” The director said and Kris nodded. The Duizhang doesn’t want to see chickens with his eyes anymore, but little did he know…

That his real end…

Was…

Very…

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

NEAR!

“Ah!” Kris shouted as he woke up in the middle of the night, sweat covering his body. Kris saw a nightmare and that was a hell on a nightmare.

He saw the Mother of Chickens trying to kill him with a big knife, and only the thought of that chicken without a head and with a knife in her hands made Kris’ body full of goosebumps as he was ready to throw up.

He opened his phone and stared at the clock. ‘3:30 AM’ he thought and jumped off the bed.

‘What do I do?’ Poor Kris thought as he walked to the bathroom. It was still early for the sun to rise and too early for him to start work. And A LOT earlier for him to die.

Kris wanted to cry. What was the meaning of life, now that he’s starting to imagine things. What’s the meaning of love, now that he’s afraid of chickens and hates them more then he did when he was young?

What if unexpectedly a chicken stabs him in the back? What if he tried to eat a chicken and dies? What if while shooting the movie, he actually dies from that chicken instead of just acting?

There was no hope for Kris anymore. His end was near, and Kris knew it. He felt it, he saw it but he didn’t want it.

“I shouldn’t think too much or I’ll get wrinkles.” He whispered to himself in front of the mirror. Just the thought of him getting wrinkles because of worrying and thinking too much made Kris activate his face.

Suddenly a chicken could be seen behind him with a big knife on her hands. Kris’ eyes widened and he screamed like a girl.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!” He started running around the bathroom while screaming until he finally stopped. “I forgot to apply my mascara.” He chuckled and started applying the mascara in his face. Indeed, he finally found out that he was just dreaming and that his ‘cold city guy’ image shouldn’t break.

After four long hours it was time for him to shoot the last scene.

“I’m sorry!” Wu Fan said while crying. “I know I should eat chickens, but that hurts my poor heart to taste them while they have died fous. You have a life like we do!” Wu Fan shouted at the Mother of Chickens. The Mother of Chickens was now in front of Kris, with a knife in her hands.

“If you won’t eat us, then we’ll eat you.” The Chicken said as she stabbed him.

“NO!!!” Wu Fan shouted and then the camera moved to the shadows of them. The chicken was stabbing Kris and everything turned red when a bit of blood prevented the camera lenses to record any further.

Then, the movie ended with the Mother of Chickens cooking Kris as the little chickens were waiting for it to be done.

“Bonne appétit.” The Mother of Chickens said as the little chickens ran to the delicious food named: Wu Fan.

And so the movie ended, leaving the director with his mouth hanging on the floor.

“I knew you were a great actor, but this was better than any other movie we’ve filmed together!” The director said while grinning as he patted Kris’ back.

“We shouldn’t be afraid of fear.” Kris smiled with his face and was walking to his friends.

“Hey Kris! Let’s eat some chicken!” Onew said while grinning.

“Chicken is not my style.” He replied with a smirked.

“How dare you!” Onew was fuming red and Tao started to cry again.

“But you promised hyung.”

“Maybe next time?” Kris grinned with his famous y face and left the boys killing him with their glares. If only looks could kill, Kris would be a grilled chicken right now.

-After a month-

The same dream has been invading Kris lately. He can’t sleep, and when he thinks he finally found peace, he would wake up because of the thought of the Mother of Chickens eating him up.

“Onew, please come over?” Kris asked Onew as they were talking on the phone. Something was strange about Onew’s voice though. It seemed… like a chicken’s.

“Sure.” Onew said with his chicken-like voice and Kris waited for him patiently.

“Hey Onew, you’re finally he- AAAAAAA” Kris screamed as he saw Onew with the Mother of Chickens in his arms.

“Eat me, please.” The and already cooked chicken said as she waited for Kris to eat her.

“Never! Chicken is not my style.”

“Oppa Wu Fan style!” Chen, Key, Tao, Baekhyun and Xiumin popped their head behind Onew’s back and started dancing Oppa Wu Fan style.

Poor Duzhang Kris started crying and sat on the dinner table. “Yah you. Come here.” He said while drinking a cup of Coke and staring at the already cooked Mother of Chickens.

“I’m dying here! Can’t you see?” Kris shouted at the chicken but the only thing she could say was;

“Eat me. Eat me. Eat me. I’m all yours Kris. Eat me.” Kris his lips and smelled the chicken, when finally he took a bite of the now-delicious chicken.

“This is good!” Kris said as he started eating it all. His teammates started clapping their hands happily and Kris grinned while enjoying the taste of the delicious Mother of Chickens.

“I was going to keep being a cold guy, but chicken is really delicious.” Kris confessed and he grinned at his dear teammates, who were now eating the other chickens like hungry monsters.

“A chic a day keeps the doctor away.” Kris whispered and continued eating the delicious half eaten chicken that was in front of him. ‘I know you want these legs.’ Her legs whispered and he started eating them, becoming ONE with his chicken maniac friends.

-The End-

A/N: So this is my first one-shot ever! What do you think of it? Do you like it? Please comment :3 ♥

I tried my best OTL >.< I hope it was a bit funny...