(Rae In)

I knew another day has started as the heat from the sun radiates on my skin. I wake up to a still unfamiliar place. Very different from the dim lighted room with almost the male scent dominating. It rather smells like Jasmine here. I feel so close to nature.

As I look beside me, I found him, the man I admittedly fell in love with. His face looks vulnerable against the soft fabrics. His white fair skin shines against the sunlight. He is beautiful.

I move slowly to leave the bed silently. I don’t want to ruin this angel’s deep sleep. As I go and look outside the window, I can see people from the beach having their morning sunbathing. It looks like they are having so much fun. I’m not that sociable though I interact a lot for work related stuff, so I don’t think I’ll have so much fun the same way they do if I ever go there and mingle. But somehow, I want to try.

This is Brazil. This is abroad, and I’m not sure if I can visit here some other time again. I feel like I want to try everything and take experiences as much as I can. I want to go to places people always go to. I want to experience having fun like them.

Just yesterday, when we woke up from a nap, we went together to walk on our side of the beach. It was silent in there, so away from the people gathering on the other side of the beach. The wind wasn’t too strong, but enough that I had my hair so messed up when we came back. Taemin kept laughing, like my tangled hair was the most amazing thing he had seen in this world. But it was amusing to see him laugh with the smallest thing. He seemed like a child happy enough to get a piece of candy from his mom.

I chuckle at the thought of his smile. I could only imagine right now that this man is mine for two whole weeks. I can make him laugh like that, smile like that, and I can make him so happy during our stay here.

Ah… the present.

I just remembered about the present his mom was talking about. It was in my luggage? Which one of those bags?

Walking back to the bed, I saw my three bags placed on the other side of the bed. I’ll see what that gift is, and maybe I could show it to Taemin as well when he wakes up. She looked so excited while talking about it, now I am so intrigued.

In the bag where my laptop, some books, and paperworks (Since before we left, I thought this whole trip would be boring), I saw this unfamiliar paper bag carefully placed and I knew I never put it there. Probably it was the gift she was talking about.

So I get it with all anticipation, it was some red colored cloth which is soft and really smooth. This must be goo-

What?

What the hell?

It’s a freaking 2-piece red bikini !! – just like those I’ve seen in his living area when I was cleaning it during the first day.

What the…

Why did his mom put it here?!

“Rae In-ah?”

“D-deehh?!” Immediately, I hide the scary bikini and look at him.

“W-what time is it?” He asks innocently as he looks around and surveys the place as if he is mentally questioning himself why he woke up in a different room.

“Ah, i-it’s… 7am.”

He nods. His face a bit crumpled and in confusion. “Are you okay?” Taem asks as he now stares at me – probably studying my panicking expression.

“O-oh ye-yes.” Jeez. I feel like a criminal being caught committing a very heinous crime. What will happen if he sees these undies? It will be the end of me.

“Is there something wrong?” Finally, Taemin starts to really wake up to his senses. He moves closer to me as he crawls on the bed towards my side. His eyes now start noticing the small pieces of clothes (or if these were clothes?) I am hiding between my thighs. “What are those?”

I maybe acting so defensive but I really don’t know how to prevent him from seeing these little weird stuff. “Ah – nothing, nothing – these are-“

“Is that what mom gave you as a present?” His face brightens as if he just heard a very great news. Suddenly, he jumps from the bed and goes beside me so fast I didn’t even have the time to think what to do next. In a blink of an eye, he snatches them from me and displays it in the air to take a look at it.

The wide smile on his face turned into a frown and if I can see it right, he starts blushing.

Lee Taemin is blushing over seeing a woman’s underwear – well, holding it even?! How? Why in this world would that happen? Why would he suddenly feel embarrassed of doing that? Immediately, he gave those back to me and smiled awkwardly. “W-was that her gift?” I only nod to which he answers back with a sigh. “That’s a bit weird.”

What’s weird? I was not expecting that kind of response. He was supposed to be laughing himself to death now. Just a while ago, I visually imagined him rolling over the floor dying of so much happiness.

“Well, - yeah.” I say and smile back – like nothing awkward is happening and here I am not holding any underwear in my hands.

“Omma’s pretty weird at times. Forgive her.”

“It’s nothing.”

And just as that, you can’t stop the silence from surrounding us both. Yes, I literally counted how many seconds the silence lasted. It was 43 seconds.

And while I was counting the seconds on one part of my brain, the other part was busy thinking how he reacted very differently than I expected. He looked so like a – . As if he has touched no one yet, as if it was the first time in his life that he had seen a red bikini.

Like duh! I saw numbers of red bikinis when I cleaned his house. I’m sure he had seen them – probably even touched them – removed them from all his women’s body.

That was supposed to be like an ordinary thing for him. He could have even put a “this-is-so-mainstream” expression on his face when he saw it a while ago.

This would sound funny, and I might sound crazy and pathetic for thinking about this: Maybe he already imagined me in that two-piece bikini – and he felt so gross that he told himself he would never want to see me in that. So when he saw his mother’s present – he felt so scared – like he realized a nightmare was about to happen just in case I lose my mind and decide to wear it.

Maybe it’s like that.

Of course, I would admit that. I’m far less seductive than the girls he was once involved with. Honestly, I don’t know why he likes me. I’d have to ask him later on then – but certainly not for my looks and my body.

lol. Then probably that’s true love. Whatever.

But as a woman, of course, I feel kind of disappointed. My boyfriend doesn’t want to see me in bikini. Although I won’t wear it anyways, at least, I’d feel a bit flattered to hear some “I’d like to see you in that. For sure you’ll look good.” Kind of cheesy lines.

Unfortunately, Lee Taemin has seen so many girls in bikinis that he can’t lie to himself anymore about which one would look okay and which one would look so unfine.

Nevermind, at least he respects me, right?

Ugh. But I really don’t feel good about it. Wait – so does it mean I want him to disrespect me? Oh no. Of course not!! Just –

Whatever. I don’t want to think about it.

“Hey, do you want some seafoods for breakfast? There’s a seafood restaurant just nearby, right?” He finally talks to break the silence – and he is referring to that restaurant we saw yesterday. They have a huge aquarium where customers can have some fun catching what they like to eat and then they can just have it cooked and served the way they want as well.

“Sounds good, but how about we save that for lunch? I’ll prepare pancakes for now. What do you think?” I suggest since I think if we go there, we’ll probably end up pigging out so it’s best to save it for lunch later. Meanwhile, we can just have soft meal for the morning.

“I like it.” He says, plants a soft kiss on my forehead, and stands up.

“Take a bath.” I say as I stand as well to go to the kitchen – and the red pair of bikini has gone back to its place and I’m sure I’m never gonna touch it again.