I woke up in the middle of the night due to difficulties in breathing, trying to catch my breathing. My eyes were heavy and I could barely open it. I looked outside the window but the sky was hell dark. There was no a glimpse of light. No moon. No stars. I want to sleep but the pain stopped me from sleeping. Every moment when the pain hit me, I told myself, ‘Rin, let go to kill the pain. It is time for you to go.’

But only one thing stopped me. The one and only thing that stopped me from wanted to leave this world. The person is now sleeping by the bed side, holding onto my hand. The person I’ve spent my time with for the past 7 years. Having a brain tumor is like carrying a bomb in your body which will explode anytime. It keeps reminding me, ‘my time is up. I’m going to leave this man soon.’

‘Did I wake you up?’ I looked at Key and he was rubbing his eyes, still blurring in the middle of the night. His smiley eyes had turned into eyes with tiredness. Nothing more.

‘Anni anni. Do you want to drink some water? I’ll go over and get you.’ 

‘It’s okay. I’m fine. Go back home and rest. You have been sleeping in hospital for the past 3 days. I can see you are tired.’ My voice was getting weaker and weaker and ended up with cough.

‘I’m okay dear. I’m the almighty Key, remember? I’m fine. Ohh.. I’ve something for you.’

He walked towards the sofa and took out a photo. It was taken from his Polaroid camera. 

‘Today I walked passed a shop and I saw this star lamp. This picture will be added into our star book collection. Do you like it? I’ll buy and bring to hospital tomorrow.’

‘Dear. Please do not waste money on it. I will not be able to use it.’

‘Please don’t say that. You will be able to use it, okay? ‘

‘I’m leaving soon.’

‘No, you are not going anywhere okay?’

‘I’m trying to hold on. Where is Hye Jin? Is she sleeping?’

‘Yes.'

‘Can I have a look at her?’

‘Wait. I’ll carry her here.’

I wanted to see my daughter so badly. Our one and only child. 

*flashback*

‘I want you to abort this baby away!’ Key yelled at me.

‘No. I won’t!!!’

‘You have to abort this baby only then you can do chemotherapy! Do you know that you will die without going for treatment ??’

‘This is my child. No one is going to take this kid away from me. Not even you!’ 

‘Why are you so stubborn? We can have kids in the future. All I want is you. You are my everything!!’ 

‘This baby is my everything too. I’m the mother. I’ll make the decision. I want to keep this baby!’

Both Key and I started shouting at each other after we knew that we have a kid after our five years marriage. After I knew that my brain tumor was already in third stage, all I want was just to have a baby for Key. At least, he will not be bored after I died. And this creation will be a prove of our marriage. My daily prayers were just to get pregnant and finally my prayer was answered. This child would be the best present from me to him. I want to deliver this baby. 

*end of flashback*

Key brought my daughter in his arms. She was sleeping soundly. She really looks like her father especially her features. Even if she cries, she did sound like her father. Annoying. 

Key helped me to seat up and handed me our daughter. 

‘Baby. Our daughter really looks like you especially her face shape, rough eye brow and small mouth.’ I told Key.

‘Nae. I bet that she is going to be as pretty as you when she grew up.’

‘Baby… Can you promise me something please?’

‘What is it?’ 

‘Get a new wife after I passed away. Give Hye Jin a complete family. Let her take care of you and Hye Jin. I’m sorry for not being able to do my job....as a wife.’

‘Darling, how many times must I say this to you? My only wife is only Lee Tae Rin. My daughter’s mother will only be Lee Tae Rin. Do you understand? You still have to see our daughter to enter kindergarden, primary school, secondary, university, get a boyfriend, get married and deliver a grandchild for you okay?’ 

‘I…… I can’t wait anymore.’ I started tearing up while taking a deep breath.

Key wiped my tears and wrapped his hands around me. 

‘Baby, take your Polaroid camera. Let’s take a family photo.’ That was the last family photo of us. After we took, I just knew that I was very pale with my beanies on and the smile that was on Key’s face was nothing but a fake smile. 


‘Baby. Put Hye Jin back to bed.’ I ordered him again. 

I gave my kiss on Hye Jin forehead. It was my last kiss for my daughter. 

‘Baby. Thank you for loving me and taking care of me. You are really a good husband.’

‘Darling, stop talking. You are tired.’

‘No. Please let me talk. I don’t think I can wait until tomorrow.’

‘Are you not feeling well? Do you want me to get the nurse?’

‘It’s okay. I’m fine. I just want you to hug me.’

Key sat beside me and gave me a hug. I could feel the warmness from his body. I could feel his heartbeat was pounding very fast. I starting tearing up again, wetting his shoulder. I could feel that my shoulder was wet too. My husband cried. 

‘Baby. I’m tired. I want to sleep.’

‘No dear. Please don’t sleep. Please. I’m begging you. Please don’t sleep.’ He yelled.

‘I’m sorry…. I love you.’

‘Baby!!!! NOOOOOO!!!!!! Baby! Please stay awake. I still need you. Our daughter still needs you,’ Key started crying louder and louder. I was tired. I did not know want to respond.

‘Babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’ 

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‘Shut up. I want to sleep. Dear can you sing our love song for me? I want to listen to it.’ I requested. 

‘I’ll sing. I’ll sing! Please listen, I’ll sing.’


You make me smile like the sun, fall out of bed
Sing like bird, dizzy in my head
Spin like a record, crazy on a Sunday night

You make me dance like a fool, forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Oh, you make me smile 

‘Good bye.’ I bid a goodbye. That was the last word I said to him. I closed my eyes while listening to the time of him singing this song. Normally he will sing it cheerfully and happily, but this time he sang with tears. He cried non-stop.

‘Tae Rin, I love you.’ He was hugging my dead body and gave a kiss on my forehead. 

‘I will take care of Hye Jin. I will do a job as father and a job as a mother. See you next life.’ He wiped his tears and kissed my hand for the last time. 

-END OF ONE SHOT FANFICTION - UNFAILING LOVE-