I woke up with swollen eyes again....

I am tired of the same ending repeating over and over....

Why do I always fall to the wrong guy? They do sweet things to me and let me fall on those beautiful words they say. But as usual they only think of me as a friend, a younger sister and the worst someone that could be with them when the person they want to be with is not there to accompany them.

I guess this Christmas will be just like the past 18 Christmases I celebrated, it would be cold and gloomy, at least my friends are there, they could lighten it even just a little....

Hmmm.... I shouldn't let that horrible thing from yesterday ruin the mood for today.

I should do my daily routine now, I should get up from this cold bed, get out from this lonely and boring room, move on, eat the same flavoured cereal that I never get tired of eating, fix myself and leave the house.

 

Since it would be Christmas Eve tonight people are busy on Christmas parties and celebrations, so like the others we have one too and maybe because of depression I volunteered on buying our food and the things we need. I should keep myself busy to forget things....

Anywhere I look I could only see couples expressing their love with each other.....it's kinda annoying!

Even the billboards and the commercial advertisement on those televisions I passed by thinks that they are in love....seriously.

Am I the only person in the world that will celebrate Christmas this way?

It left me no other choice but to just glue my eyes on the ground, I just hope I will not bump into someone....

 

"Oh my gosh! I'm sorry! I am so sorry!" what the hell am I thinking, of course I would hit someone it is too crowded in here and to make it worse my hot cafe latte splashed all over his coat. I apologized and glanced at him but he is in a hurry to even care. 

I suddenly noticed....he's pretty cute, tall and those brown eyes.....aigoo! To be in a hurry in such time, maybe he is late and his girlfriend is waiting angry and irritated. What a waste he's already taken....

This is really the problem with me, I fall in love easily, I make assumptions that i will regret sooner or later, just like what happened recently.

"Yoojeong-ah!" someone called me out of nowhere and how lucky am I to found out that it is him.

I just greeted them then walk in a way that is not obvious that I'm hurrying. Thanks to a pastry shop nearby I could take some time to let them be out of my sight.

Why do I need to see them here? And what's wrong with him acting like I didn't confess my feelings towards him yesterday.

He acted like a boyfriend to me for a week just for me to found out that he has a girlfriend who is on an out of the country vacation! Aish! I can't believe he even existed!.....But again the first thing I did today is to move on, so I should get going.

 

Time flies so fast it's already 1:00 pm and I'm hungry, a delicious pasta would probably ease the pain....

 

As I entered the door I saw the guy I bumped into this morning and like what I said he has a girlfriend.

I sat on a place beside the window, well it's comfortable and I could see this couple...I'm still curious about him.

The girl is so lucky he has a cute boyfriend and he looks nice too. I keep on staring at them until my order came, this food seriously looks delicious...

I tried looking at them again and I saw the guy looking towards my direction, I almost spit everything that is inside my mouth!

I can't concentrate on my food now.....I tried looking again and he's still onto it. I should hurry. Too bad I won't be able to enjoy this delicious pasta…

I asked for the bill and left the restaurant, I took a last look and saw him directing his eyes on me as I walked out...

That was really awkward maybe he's mad about the coffee and thought that I'm such an envious girl for staring at them. Aahhh seriously....

 

Forget that and remember not to ruin the mood....

I should continue looking for these items in the grocery and go straight to that noraebang (singing room)  to prepare things.

 

These are the times when I suddenly miss my family maybe I won't be this sad if I'm with them. I should book a flight to the US before New Year so I could at least celebrate it with them. Maybe if I just didn't insist on studying here in Korea, I wouldn't experience all this. Regret is really always in the end.

 

It’s 5 pm and I’m done buying things, I hope they are already there so I could at least freshen up before our party.

 

“Yoojeong-ah! You’re here give that to me and take some rest.”

“Aahh it’s really tiring, you don’t want to know the things that happened” I complained as I sat on the couch near me.

“That’s why we want you to take some rest and you should also fix yourself you look pale and a bit haggard. How can you find a boyfriend if you’re always like that!”

“Thanks for the advice I’m so happy I have friends like you” I said sarcastically with an annoyed laugh as they laugh with me…..

“I will just go to the washroom!”

 

Beautify myself? I don’t think that would even work on a love idiot like me….

But putting some make up on wouldn’t hurt at least I could be more confident with myself…

This is funny I am actually following their advice… Aigoo what a joke I should go back now…

 

That guy approaching he kinda resembles the guy I keep on bumping into the whole day…..

If only finding the one you are destined to love is just as easy as bumping into someone accidentally, probably almost everyone in the world is in love without any bitterness and insecurities…..

 

Will I ever meet someone that will love me the way I love them? I would love to experience the feeling of being important to someone…. But I understand how life works, I should just wait I know that there is this guy that is meant to be for me and I just hope that I could meet him soon….

“Hi!” the guy approaching suddenly stopped in front of me and greeted so I looked up and I was surprised to see that it’s him.

“Umm hi…” I stuttered and just greeted him back. This left me speechless, what a coincidence.

“It’s you!” he uttered suddenly, maybe he remembered me, the girl who spilled coffee on him. This is embarrassing all bad lucks in a whole day, that’s unfair! I should just pretend that I don’t remember anything.

“I’m sorry? Maybe you got the wrong person.” I said as I tried to hide my face, I’m not so good at lying.

“No, no I am sure that it is you!” he insists. Oh no he probably got something on his mind, is he mad? Well of course that’s hot coffee and who would be happy when something like that happen to you early in the morning. Ah whatever I’ll just go with the flow, I can do this!

“Umm well yeah I guess I’m that girl and-ah… about what happened this morning I’m really really sorry to ruin your day with your girlfriend.” I apologized sincerely looking down, I really feel bad….

He put his hands on my shoulder like his trying to comfort me.

“That’s nothing! But if your conscience won’t leave you, you could always repay me. How ‘bout you meet me later on the rooftop? Yeah that’s right meet me after the clock hits 12. I will be waiting for you! So I’ll just see you there! Ah and yeah that is my sister.... I DON’T HAVE ANY GIRLFRIEND!” he said with a beautiful bright smile on his face. I was so surprised by what he said.

He doesn't have any girlfriend? Then he's hitting on me? That was fast hahaha! Nah that's impossible....

But who is he?....

 

“Yoojeong-ah where have you been? We’re about to start now!”

“I’m sorry I just came back from the washroom.”

 

Should I go there later? What if he is just some scammer who wants to take some money from me? Or some ert!...But he’s too cute too be one…..but! That’s not an exception. But what if he just really wanted to say something? Should I go?

 

“Yoojeong, why are you so quiet it is just 30 minutes before Christmas and you haven’t enjoy yourself yet. What’s bothering you?” should I tell her? If you only knew what’s going on in my mind right now…

“This is nothing I’m just still hungry maybe I should eat some more hahaha!” that fake laugh should solve the problem.

“Hmm ok! Wait we should start our gift giving! Hey everyone!!!”

After the exchanging of gifts we will go home already so we can celebrate with our families…but my family’s not with me it will just make me sad.

Maybe I should go on the rooftop that would buy some time before tomorrow comes and I should repay him somehow, there’s nothing wrong right? No, I mean there is but can’t I try?

 

“Merry Christmas!!”

 

Hmm Merry Christmas everyone…I hope my family are enjoying themselves there…

 

“Yoojeong-ah Merry Christmas? You’re still spacing out eh…. Aren’t you going home yet? If not I guess this is goodbye.”

“Ah yes I still have to go somewhere, goodbye, take care and I’ll see you soon!”

“Bye Yoojeong take care too, don’t worry too much on things okay. You will surely have a wonderful Christmas!” I smiled at what she said then went straight to the stairs.

 

I am actually doing this….

 

“You came!” he said as I opened the door. I am really nervous right now. What are his reasons that he even asked me to go here?

"Yeah I actually came. So can I ask what is it? I mean the repaying thingy..."

"I just want to tell you something and I hope you will listen..." he suddenly became serious. This is awkward....

"That's it? Sure I will listen...so what is it?" I said with a nice smile. 

 

"You know I don't believe in destiny.....but if it's true I really want it to be with you. From now on I'll be there....I'll do all I can not to take my eyes off of you and to make sure that you will never be alone again...." he blurted out looking into my eyes with all sincerity and truthfulness.

My face turned red and my heart is beating so fast, it feels like it wants to get out from my chest.....what is he saying?

"How could you say that?....we just ...we just met each other?" I was really shocked by his sudden boldness. I can't believe that there is actually someone who could confess their feelings to a stranger.

"I've liked you ever since... then you left me but that was before...you're here now and I'm happy with that." he said as he get near me. I want to be scared because of the way he acts but I can feel an attachment as if what he is saying really happened.

"Tell me who are you?"

"I can't believe you don't remember me.....Yoojeong-ah it's me...Yook Sungjae, the one you will love forever but you don't need to worry because I will absolutely love you back!" he said as he cupped my cheeks between his hands.

"Sungjae-ah..." it's him. I remember now, everything from the past is starting to sink into my mind one by one...Why didn't I notice it on the first place....I hugged him tightly to repay for all the years that I forget everything about him and the fact that I left him when we are still young.

 

Now I understand, love really comes on the most unexpected time and place.

Whether you have known that person for a long time or just a simple accident lead you to meet, if it is love no one or nothing can hinder you from finding each other.....

 

This is going to be the best Christmas gift ever....