That Day
Forgetting
It was cold, but the sun was out. Flowers were shut into their small pods and people were in layers, covering up from the hasrsh weather.
I forget how cold it was, but I needed gloves. He came again, that day. He had hot chocolate and a silly looking beanie on his head. It was orange and this disgusting green colour. He said it was his winter hat and he liked it a lot.
That was the last day I saw him. I wanted to follow him, but I was bound to that cold metal wheelchair, trapped.
I woke up from that dream months later, screaming in a cold sweat for him, for my Chanyeol. But of course he was already gone. He refuesed to come in, to see me again. I didn't accept that for a while, and when I did, I was home.
I forget how often I'd call him, leaving messages on his answering machine, I just wanted him to say something to me, a hello would do, at that point. I got nothing, of course. But he answered once.
His voice was tired and he sounded angry.
"Hello?" He asked, a frustrated sigh came out of his lips as the phone rattled as he adjusted it against his ear. "Baekhyun?" He asked, my heart banged inside of my ears and I stood there, frozen. "It's you, huh? I'm sorry." He said, before the line went dead and all I could hear was the beep.
He was sorry. Kris was sorry, but was Chanyeol? I didn't know.
I worked hard on getting better. I was visited by so many people that I used to know. I was dependent on so many people, I couldn't even stand to be with them all the time.
Meals cooked, clothes washed, bed made, shoelaces tied, shirts buttoned, jeans zipped, hair brushed, everything was done by someone else for such a long time. I would forget what to do with a toothbrush, that it became dangerous to leave me with the small thing. Luhan would have to brush my teeth, to make sure I wouldn't choke on it.
I wasn't anything. I wanted to see Chanyeol. I wanted to die.
But I kept going, to get better. I was going to show Chanyeol that I was better and I could love him, all over again. It lingered in my head, that Chanyeol was really gone, I'd push it down and into the pit of black that was my mind, saying he'd be mine again, one day.
"He said he doesn't know what to say to you." Kyungsoo said, he'd finished cooking a meal and he was sitting besides me. Kyungsoo doesn't lie, fib, slap a soft word over a bandaid and call it a day, he's honest and harsh. "Maybe it's time to move on." He said. I nodded, but inside of my head, I knew he was wrong.
What if he wasn't wrong? I thought that a lot, but I never gave up. Why would I, when Chanyeol is mine?
Author's Note
So, this is the first chapter. Yes it is short, it's meant to be. Chapters will get longer, as I switch it to present, this is Baekhyun thinking of his past. You can see that there isn't any interaction between Baekhyun and Chanyeol, but there will be, later on.
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