The clouds are grey. Everything seemed really foggy. The world. It seemed to have stopped spinning. Silence. Darkness. Waiting for me ahead. This must be what letting go of your first love must be like. Isn't it? Not a single day goes by, where I don't feel this. Is this not like soap bubbles, the ones in which we played with when we were little, where if we get too close to the surface of the bubbles themselves, that they burst. Is this how first love is? We all must have experienced this before, haven't we.

Why do we fall in love so easily? What is it with our DNAs and falling in love? Are we meant to feel this pain? I just wish I could block off love, with a barrier in my mind. Or is it in my heart? But I am also afraid to become a heartless person. The type who does not have a care to the world. There was a book I have read in my childhood. It was called A Christmas Carol. The story where there is this man who did not have a care to the world. This led to the community not liking him. At the same time as wanting to lock my feelings away, I don't want to be ignored by life itself.

I regret many things that I did not do with her. That I did not say to her. The wrong things I did to her. If I could replay the times where I was with Seyoung, and we were very close...

Yuri pressed the save button, and turned off her laptop. She then stood up from her study table, and moved to her bedroom. It was late at night. The clean breeze floated gently into her room. She peered out the window, and looked out. From high up in her apartment, she saw that the city looked completely different at night. It was fascinating to her.

At school, she tried to conceal these thoughts.She hid them from everyone. She wanted to still be normal. Someone without worries in life. But at home, she felt like herself. It was the only place where she could let out her true feelings, as there was no one there to see it. Every night, she wrote on that laptop about her thoughts. It was about one of the very few things that would keep her sane. She could keep these, and go over them, to see her past in the future. Perhaps avoid these situations. Or even just read it to remember how life was back then.

Yuri smiled, as she approached her bed, and lay down in it, pulling up the blanket up to her neck, and slowly dozed off to sleep.

It was snowing. The city coated in that foamy white fluff. Yuri awoke to the cold, and shivered.
Life was going better for her. She managed to survive, and moved to a better apartment. This was, with the aid of BoA. She considered BoA as her big sister. Always there for her. She pulled off some jobs with BoA and earned herself some money. It was more risky, but was easy money. Way easier than working part time at 3 different restaurants and cafes.

She crossed off the date on her calendar beside her bed. Several months passed. It was like...what? 4 months? 5 months? She has lost track of time. The days go by in a blur. Mid-year exams are coming up. They seemed impossible to conquer. She viewed past papers, and thought they were impossible. It's not like someone like her had all the time in the world to study. She flinched. Her arm was still sore from an accident a few days ago. Yoona... that idiot. Why did she pick a fight with Seyoung? She has no chance. That little . I had to step in to protect her. And for what? An injured arm? She should be more than thankful...

Yuri stepped out an hour later, in a heavy coat, and fresh looks. She wore a beanie on her head, and woollen gloves on both of her hands. Winters in Korea were merciless. Cold. Freezing. She ventured out to the local shopping centre, where she was going to meet up with Seyoung at the local shopping centre. Seyoung seemed to have gotten fond of Yuri. Her personality was still the same. She acted like she did not care, but instead, she actually did.

Yuri apporached BoA, who was waiting out the front of the apartment. "Slept well?"
"Yeah. Much better. I love this apartment." Yuri replied.
"Ahh... glad to help. Come. You're gonna be late. I'm heading over there to meet up with a contact. We can go together." BoA led Yuri to her car, and beckoned her to hop in.

Yuri sat in the front seat of the car, and held her gloved hands over the car's heater. The cold was just unbearable, even though she has been through it many times. When people say that they love the cold, they will change their mind once they've settled in here for one winter.
"The cold's gotcha, hm?" BoA noticed Yuri shivering.
"Yeah. How are you not cold?" Yuri asked.
"Well, I got used to it. That's all. It's not too bad." BoA grinned as she watched Yuri's reaction.
"How can you possibly get used to it?" Yuri asked in awe.|
"Well, I have my ways."

They arrived at the shopping centre, and parted. Yuri hurried to the entrance, and noticed Seyoung standing there, waiting. She smirked when she spotted Yuri. "Eyo, Yuri. You are late, like always."
"Please. I'm on time. You're just early." Yuri grinned.

She had this feeling whenever she was with Seyoung. It felt weird. It could not be coming back, could it?
When they walked in, they did not notice Yoona walk in with Taeyeon and Tiffany. They went different ways, Yuri and Seyoung heading to the cinema, while Yoona, Tiffany and Taeyeon heading to the clothes stores.

"I can't believe that Yuri has not talked to me much for like the past two weeks. It's so unnerving!" Yoona complained out loud.
"Well, you did just pick a fight with Seyoung a few days ago." Taeyeon pointed out the obvious.
"Well, no crap. But I hate it when they both just wonder off into their own little world. Yuri can't have feelings for Seyoung. That would be madness. Ahh... my mind's gonna explode!" Yoona clutched her head in her palms.
"Well. It's obvious you have feelings for her. Just. I don't know. Be chilled. You don't need to pick a fight with Seyoung to show everyone who you like. She is like, very strong as well. How could you have forgotten that..." Tiffany started.
"Stop. Stop. Stop. Please. You guys aren't helping your friend who needs help. Gosh." Yoona whined.

They wondered around for a few hours. Buying clothes. And makeup. Anything they saw looked good.
When they approached the food court, Tiffany pointed out forward. "Hey, is that Yuri and Seyoung?"
Yoona looked up and followed Tiffany's finger with her gaze. There, in front of them, was Yuri and Seyoung, sitting at a table, laughing at something. Yoona felt her heart sink at that sight. She immediately approached them, and stood next to their table.
On her way, she heard bits of their conversation.
"...your training?... you want me... beat you up... need to be able to handle many punches.... you got soft these few years..."

They both looked up from their conversation when Yoona loomed over their table, and stared down at them.
"What do you want?" Yuri asked.
"What do you think? Why are you two together? Why are you here?" Yoona asked quickly.
"Why should we answer to you? You are the one who picked the fight to me. It's a pity that Yuri had to injure her arm to protect the weakling that you are." Seyoung replied.

The three of them stared at each other. Taeyeon and Tiffany decided to stay out of it, and stood away from the trio.
"Let's just go." Yuri stood up and grabbed Seyoung's wrist, and dragged her away from Yoona.
Yoona opened to protest, but decided against it.
She just watched as they both exited the shopping centre.

"That movie was a good movie. Too bad that Yoona had to ruin the day." Seyoung sighed.
"Yeah, I know right." Yuri replied.
"Ah wells, see you soon, matey!" Seyoung headed off and raised her hand as she walked off to say goodbye.
Yuri headed over to BoA's car, and noticed BoA inside, doing something on her laptop. She entered the car, and greeted her.
"Wow, it's nice and warm in here." Yuri exclaimed.

"Yeah, it is." BoA replied. "So, how was it? Fun?"
Yuri nodded, as they headed back to Yuri's apartment. There, she exited, and waved good bye as BoA exited the parking lot. Afterwards, she entered her room, and threw her things on a chair. She took a deep breath and sat at her study table. She then opened her laptop.

A person notices another person. Their eyes meet. This sparks something deep in a person's heart. She then becomes attracted to the other person. Can't get enough of them. It's just like perfection. That word. It's in front of your, all the time. Just, ten metres in front of you. Close enough to get. Yet you can't reach it. It's too far to grab. And when you walk towards it, it also moves away from you. That's what love can be like. You know you want to get that person. They are within your reach. But you can't grab them.

Life is getting better I guess. Seyoung is cool. She hasn't changed. Just that we had a difficult start. But the fact that I'm torn in between Seyoung and Yoona is just too overwhelming. I just wished that they could stop fighting. The winter is too harsh on me already. The snow. The wind. The icy cold that chills me to my bones. They just add to my worries.
Well, you just gotta keep on living, I guess. That's how life works, right?

Haha, love triangles. How classic. How will it turn out? Yoona has been acting up because of this.
Well well...
sorry about the lags in updates. Please don't hate.
School has started for me. So I am loaded with homework :3

Ah anyways, hope you like this story!
~Chirpie~