"I did not raise you like this," Kai felt someone faintly looming over him in midst of his heavy slumber. He could barely open his eyes and with a huge yawn, he turned over so he was on his back. Why does the voice sound so familiar?

      "I'm talking to you mister," The irate voice continued to bellow in his ears and Kai could only beg for peace and quiet at the moment. He scrunched his eyes tighter and wrapped his arms around a pillow. Seconds later however, he felt himself forcefully pulled out of his bed and onto the cold bedroom floor.

       Slightly awake now, Kai glanced up with uncertainty and gulped at the sight of his dad. His face was fuming red and even in the dark, Kai was certain his dad was beyond furious. The digital clock that was perched on top of his desk read 3:44 AM, which only heightened his anxiety. Did he do something wrong again? He couldn't recall any particular event that took place recently that could have made him so mad. Unless what happened yesterday, ...

"What can go wrong? He's not even home yet, hell, when is he ever home to begin with?" Chanyeol snickered, pushing the alcoholic beverage towards him. 

"Shut up," Kai growled and pressed the tip of the bottle firmly to his lips before taking a long gulp. "As if you know anything about my family -"

"Family?" Chanyeol sneered once again and took a sip of his drink. "Tell me the last time he's been remotely good to you ever since your mom left."

      Kai's heart stung at the sudden yet blunt mention of his mom's departure that took place barely three weeks ago. He had been wondering what made her decide she wanted to leave so urgently, what could have possibly been the trigger that made her feel she no longer wanted to stay with them. He didn't even bother questioning his dad because he was sure he was taking it worse. Being married for almost twenty years to your dream woman must have made some kind of impact, relative or not. 

       He saw no point in answering Chanyeol because he was right. He was blatantly telling the truth and though he wouldn't have preferred false hope any better, he held in the irresistible urge to punch him straight in his face. The truth never hurt so bad.

       The rest of the night passed by like a blur, the only thing he could vaguely remember was arriving back at home and nearly tearing the entire house apart. He heard glass shatter around him, tables and chairs tossed as he scavenged through the house, searching for some kind of outlet that could ease the heavy aching in his heart. Nothing worked, nothing could alleviate the irregular and fast pounding in his chest. He knocked out in bed not that long after, only to be discovered by his dad hours later.

    His father's stiff expression hadn't changed since the moment he was tossed merciless out of his bed. His eyes were now dull and emotionless, void of any desire to associate himself with his son any longer. He simply gestured out towards the open door, where Kai could now clearly see the mess he had made the night before. 

    It was a lot worse than he had imagined. Their once beautiful, highly praised, maintained house now looked like a filthy, disgusting pigsty. Shattered glass still stuck fixed into the floor and if Kai didn't know any better, he wouldn't have realized that his father's right leg had blood slightly oozing through the soles of his feet. He glanced back at his dad in anticipation of whatever punishment that fall upon him now that he had fully taken in the disastrous scene. He supposed he would be fine with a heavy beating or a year grounding, it seemed reasonable enough.

    Kai watched as his father staggered out of his room, leaving him no choice but to follow him. He winced as his feet grazed against several sharp pieces of glass but knew better than to complain. After all, it was completely his doing and there was nothing he could do to change that. By now, the silence that had quickly engulfed the two was ominous as ever which was frightening to think about. He followed his father's steps until he abruptly stopped at the door and swung it open with a single hand. What laid in front of the two were steps that led to the exit of the house. Puzzled, Kai scanned his father's face for any clues and was about to speak up until his dad finally opened his mouth. 

       "Out." He managed to hoarsely whisper, his hands shaking in tremor. It was as if he was the one who had made the mess, as if he was the one who was responsible for everything even though it had been Kai. "Leave and never come back." He continued, his mind made up. "-and don't bother looking for me."

       "Appa," Kai immediately opened his mouth to protest, he could feel his throat tightening as he tried to speak. His father had hit him in the past, yelled at him for hours, and even neglected to feed him for a few days once. But he had never, not once, so bluntly told him he could no longer stay with him anymore. Ever since his mom had left, Kai without even realizing, held onto his dad even tighter. He clung onto him because he was scared, so worried of the possibility that he might lose his father as well. The only other 'family' he had. 

        "Don't call me that anymore." His father cut him off bitterly, He nodded weakly towards the door as if signalling him to leave now. As if no matter what his son had to say, would only prove to be impotent because he had made up his mind. And that was all that mattered. 

         Kai bit his lower lip and lowered his eyes as he walked past his dad and down the steps. He knew there was no point in trying to argue with him anymore; the fact that his father was stubborn as hell was something that had stayed the same since the beginning. So he obliged, leaving the house like his father had wanted so at least one person would be happy that night. But secretly, he had wanted his father to call after him and take back all he said and plead him to come back because he was the one at fault and not his son.

         Kai walked down the stairs, waiting to hear those bittersweet words that never came.

        Inches away from exit, Kai turned back and looked up at his dad with darkened eyes. "If that's what you want," He muttered, taking one last look of all he had left before slamming the door shut.

        If that's what you want, then that's fine with me.

         And Kai ran as fast as he could into the night, with nowhere in particular to go to. Because at this point, there was no "home" he could return to. There was no one who would welcome him back with wide-spread arms, no one who would chastise him for his little mistakes or praise him for his accomplishments. Starting that night, he didn't have anyone.

         He stopped running the moment he felt his body crash into a wall he had failed to see. Groaning, he slowly fell to his knees and hugged his legs in pain. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes, not from the collision, but pent up frustration that he no longer had control over.

For the first time in years, Kai cried.