Title - Hmm…this is a hard one. I realize that it IS a secret love, but I feel like you could've made it more personal. However, there is nothing wrong with it.   3/5 points.
Foreword-  I really enjoyed the little story in the foreword. Jonghyun's SN is a little cliche, but it works. I like how you described the characters in detail. 9/10 points.

Writing Style - I enjoy the little recaps. It helps remember what happened last chapter. Good job labeling the POV's so I know who's talking. I like how you include links and explain the clothing and everything. It makes it easier to visualize. Your writing style is also pretty easy to follow, I had little trouble reading it. However, like I mentioned, you could take the time to develop the characters more  21/25 points.

Plot - You know what would've gave this store more meat? If you explained the girl's past. WHO messed with her. If that's the case, she shouldn't trust Jonghyun so willingly. I see you mentioned Jay, but maybe you could've expanded that more. Like, you could've explained all the things they did together. I notice that you just write something, but you don't expand on it. (Jessica and Onew dating? That could've made a good backstory.) I agree with the other critique, I think you could slow down the story a little, and take time to develop the story more. It'll really make a difference.  15/20 points

Creativity-  Hmm, I have to agree, the whole childhood friend thing IS  a bit cliche, but you include some original thoughts into here. The lottery for Jonghyun being one of them. 5/10 Points.
Characters and Setting- I like how you explained the relationship between the mom and the character; it feels realistic. Jonghyun's character seems a little…bubbly in my opinion, I mean…normal guys don't usually act like "meanie >:(" Just saying. But, I do admit, it's refreshing since a lot of fics have him as a jerk. I also like the grandma's personality a lot. It bring some comic relief into the story, and those are always good. 7/10 points

Grammar/Spelling/Punctuation- I noticed some careless mistakes. Not putting a space between words, and a few tense errors. Be careful okay?  11/15 points.

Consistency- Lily, you seem to be doing your best to write and update whenever you can. I realize it's not easy to update a lot, but I respect that you take the time to write, apologizing if you feel it's late. Keep up the work! 5/5 points.

Bonus: Lily, you always read my stories and comment, and for that, I award 2 bonus points.
Also, it was fun to read. I wasn't struggling to read the whole thing; I mean I subscribed after all. Plus 1!
Total: 79/100

-------

Wahh so nice :)

P.S. I honestly was going to show more of the characters side like that Jessica and Onew relationship kekeke, just don't think it's time to reveal what really happened yet.. :P Im sucha tease XD Thank you!

-----

Letter to my readers:

       Dear reader who actually thinks my piece of crud (dee story xP) is good,

So sorry for not updating, and for tricking you with what you thought was a new chapter xP

I have been busy writing my new fanfic with my co-author(and cousin) ILiekTodos and on top of

that school started! I'm so sorry, but thank you to all of those who took the time to subscribe (the 26 of you)

and commented. I lurve you ;D

-Lily<333