I thought I would be okay with this...

I though it would be fun.

I'm not that shy. I'm bubbly and friendly and I always was naturally charismatic to the other idols I've met. It was easy. They were just people after all, besides they LOVE a fangirl that doesn't fangirl.

Which is why I decided to do this. Yes. I decided to do this to test my resolve and further my career. But now...

Now...

I'm scared less. I cannot do this. I'm going to cancel the show right now!

I scrambled around my small living room-ish space, which was currently a mess of tangled comforters Choco Pies and chocolate bar wrappers, to look for my phone.

“Stupid Samsung...can never find the damn thing...should have kept my iPhone 6S...” I yelled throwing the comforter on to the loveseat behind me, neglecting the fact that had a CUP OF TEA lying on top of the fabric. Now their was tea everywhere. Now I have to clean a mess.

Sighing I trotted towards the kitchen happy that Korea has heated floors, but pissed that I now have to clean said floor...and the comforter...and my Chocopies! Ugh...life truly hates me.

There it was sitting on the counter...diagonally. Wait...when I left it...it was horizontal and pointing towards the rice cooker.

“Christ!!” I picked up the useless waste of good won and screamed. 6 messages from “Mr. Perfect”. Quickly scanning over the messages I ran to the door.

8:57pm Mr. Perfect – I'm sorry....

I ran with everything I had.

9:30pm Mr. Perfect – It's my fault...this entire thing. I've been too bold...at least too bold for my world...

Towards the cause of all my problems.

10:30pm Mr. Perfect – it. I don't care. I'm coming over. You like deokbeokki right? Just not the spice level I like?

This man that managed to work himself under my skin within the first hour of meeting him.

10:45pm Mr. Perfect – I'm at the store...didn't you say you were running out of Chocopies???

The same man that held my hand.

10:48pm Mr. Perfect – Nina~~Answer me please?

The same man that held me through my panic attack in the SM building earlier today. I held up filming for the day and caused so much trouble for everyone. But I remember those strong arms encircling me tightly, his strong but pleasant scent, the firmness of his chest as he pulled me in...I remember the strength in his voice as he shouted for the rest of the staff to get away from me. He said I wasn't built for this lifestyle...I wasn't ready for it. It being the cameras, the people in your face, the scrutiny, the burden...He was right...and I freaked out at the one person at was trying to help me.

I'm so stupid.

11:15pm Mr. Perfect – Open your door. I'm here.

My phone flashed 11:22pm...only seven minutes ago. He must be there...please?

Normally, I would triple think what I would do, but this was a primal reaction. No thought, all heart, and without reason. If I did not see him...

I would regret it till my last breath.

Placing my hand on the cold metal handle I flicked my wrist down and forced the door open with everything I had. Once I could see into the blindingly white hallway...my heart dropped as I stepped further out into the hallway.

“Nina-noona...” Said a voice from my left. That silky, smooth voice continued in perfect English: “You took so long...deokbeokki is no good cold. Oh, your door is closing...”

“!” I swore kicking my door back open, a tad bit more enthusiastically then needed. The freaking door, banged into the wall so hard, the echo resounded down the reflected back. So naturally, I grabbed Mr. Perfect by his sleeve and pulled him into my apartment without another word, heavy bags and all.

“Shoes off!” I commanded. He smirked sliding off his shoes and socks. “Nobody asked you to do all that.” I snapped, just I'm so emotional right now and I don't have time for idols! This turd just smiles and gives me a blank look like he doesn't understand English. I swear I'm going to snap.

Said idol decides to ignore my rage and walks further into my apartment towards the kitchenette/stove/fridge area and starts unloading his bags. What the ? This is my apartment. This may be your country, but my apartment! MINE! Growling I stalked over to Mr. Tall-enough-that-I-had-to-crank-my-neck-to-glare-at-him folding my arms across my chest.

My brown eyes connected with his gentle dark eyes and there we stared at one another.

“Nina?”

“Jin?”

“Nina-noona?”

“Jinki-hyung?” I saw him visibly cringe at that.

“Stop crying...”